EP239 - Want to Feel More Confident in the Bedroom? with Erica Lemke-Pembroke
Sexology20 Heinä 2021

EP239 - Want to Feel More Confident in the Bedroom? with Erica Lemke-Pembroke

Welcome to episode 239 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Erica Lemke-Pembroke to the podcast. In this episode, we discuss Erica’s journey to getting to her place of confidence, the importance of self-love and self-respect and how you can build your confidence to feel sexier.

Erica Lemke-Pembroke, MA, is a certified life coach, licensed, specialty-certified New Life Story ® wellness coach and sexual confidence coach. Erica has a master's degree in community counseling with a concentration in marriage and family therapy. She also holds a bachelor's degree in kinesiology and a certificate in gerontology. Her desire to work with clients from a holistic perspective has been a driving force throughout her life. Guiding others to connect with themselves: body, mind and soul came from a lifetime of creating this within herself.

Erica became certified as a life coach through Coach Training Alliance, and deepened her studies with a license, specialty-certification as a Mentor Coach and New Life Story ® Wellness Coach. This furthered her studies in neuroscience, strategic coaching and positive psychology. Combining these disciplines with her passion for keeping one's sensuality and sexuality integral to the whole person, Erica continues her mission to helping women become their most sexually confident selves.

Erica is a Californian currently living in Utah. She enjoys intimate conversations about sex, everything outdoors, dancing every single day, creating Haiku poetry and spending quality time with friends and family.

In this episode, you will hear:

  • A look at Erica’s journey to getting to her place of confidence
  • The pressure we feel to look a certain way to be sexy
  • How sexy is more about how you feel than how you look
  • How you can build your confidence to feel more sexier
  • Signs to look for if you’re struggling with low confidence
  • The importance of self-love and self-respect
  • How does a lack of confidence show up in the bedroom?

Find Erica Lemke-Pembroke Online

https://feelsexyagain.com

Dating Anxiety Checklist

https://oasis2care.com/dating-anxiety

Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio

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EP452 - Relationship Anarchy: Breaking the Norms

EP452 - Relationship Anarchy: Breaking the Norms

Welcome to Episode 452 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Roy Graff who speaks to me about relationship anarchy, consensual non-monogamy, and the importance of communication in alternative relationship structures.In this episode, Roy shares his deeply personal journey from decades of serial monogamy to embracing polyamory as an orientation and ultimately finding resonance in the philosophy of relationship anarchy. We explore the difference between open relationships and ethical non-monogamy, the role of emotional maturity, and how boundaries and communication can transform romantic connections. Roy Graff is a Psychosynthesis Relationship Counsellor based in London, UK. Drawing on his training and over nine years of experience facilitating workshops and group work, Roy supports clients in exploring the full spectrum of their physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual dimensions. His practice is inclusive and affirming of Gender, Sex, and Relationship Diversity (GSRD), welcoming LGBTQ+ individuals and those in non-monogamous relationships. In addition to his counselling work, Roy is a relationship coach specializing in alternative and non-traditional relationship dynamics, helping individuals and partners build resilience, improve communication, manage conflict, and deepen empathetic, conscious connections.In this episode, you will hear:·      Roy’s Journey From Serial Monogamy To Polyamory·      How Relationship Anarchy Challenges Social Norms·      The Difference Between Ethical And Unethical Non-Monogamy·      Why Communication Is The Foundation Of Alternative Relationships·      Navigating Jealousy And Emotional Triggers·      The Role Of Boundaries In Polyamorous Dynamics·      Strategies For Sharing Information About Other Partners·      Understanding The “Relationship Escalator”·      How Solo Polyamory Works In PracticeThank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

19 Elo 41min

EP451 - Coloring Outside the Lines: Freedom in Polyamory

EP451 - Coloring Outside the Lines: Freedom in Polyamory

Welcome to Episode 451 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Dr. Joli Hamilton who speaks to me about navigating non-monogamy, jealousy, and building healthy polyamorous relationships.In this conversation, I invite Joli to share the very human, very messy path she took from a long-term monogamous marriage into consensual non-monogamy. We talk about how a simple crush, paired with new language for polyamory, sparked courageous but complicated conversations, the pitfalls of working with clinicians who default to monogamy, and the painful social narratives that cast open-relationship exploration as “cheating” even when no boundaries are crossed. Dr. Joli Hamilton is the relationship coach for couples who color outside the lines & founder of The Year of Opening. She is a depth psychologist, TEDx speaker, best-selling author, and AASECT (pronounced ay-sect) certified sex educator. Joli co-hosts the Playing with Fire podcast. Joli’s been featured in The New York Times, CNN, Vogue, Cosmo, and NPR. She’s spent the past two decades studying and reimagining what love can be if we open our imaginations to possibility. Joli helps people create non-monogamous partnerships that are custom-built for their authentic selves, no more shrinking, pretending, or hiding required.In this episode, you will hear:·      From Monogamy To Non-Monogamy: A Real-Life Origin Story·      Why Honesty Without Skills Still Hurts·      The Therapist Fit Problem In CNM·      Naming Feelings vs. Trying To Erase Them·      Jealousy Happens - Bans Make It Worse·      Agreements, Not Assumptions·      Breakup And Aftercare In Polyamory·      Parenting And Cohabitation Considerations·      Nervous System Tools For Regulation·      Defining Your Own CNM Script Over Time Thank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex. Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

12 Elo 46min

EP450 – Monogamish: Exploring Intimacy and Freedom

EP450 – Monogamish: Exploring Intimacy and Freedom

Welcome to Episode 450 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Carrie Jeroslow who speaks to me about exploring monogamish relationships, communication, and relationship diversity.In this conversation, Carrie unpacks the term “Monogamish,” originally coined to describe a space between strict monogamy and fully open relationships, and shares how transparency, not secrecy, became the cornerstone of her own early experiences with non‑monogamy. We talk through the realities behind the “ish”: clunky starts, learning curves, aftercare, and the deep inner work that jealousy often invites.International Best-Selling Author and Relationship Diversity Advocate, Carrie Jeroslow, is passionate about bringing intentionality into intimate relationships by releasing the programming of what we’re taught relationships SHOULD be and shifting to what we really WANT them to be. This highly personal process requires getting to know one's ever-evolving self as intimately as possible. She believes that when we learn and accept who we truly are, we can be more authentic in our relationships with others, which brings an unparalleled sense of joyfulness and fulfillment to our lives as a whole.In this episode, you will hear:·      Defining Monogamish·      Honesty Over Secrecy·      Aftercare And Debriefs·      Becoming Intimate With Jealousy·      Updating Inherited Beliefs·      Boundaries You Can Revisit·      Move At The Slowest Partner’s Pace·      Culture, Labels, And Flexibility·      Communication As A Core Skill Thank you to our sponsor WIFEY, the premiere adult entertainment platform that breaks down stigmas around modern relationships, and fosters an open, shame-free space to talk about love, trust, and sex.Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

5 Elo 41min

EP449 - Sex and Self-Image: A Pleasure Journey

EP449 - Sex and Self-Image: A Pleasure Journey

Welcome to Episode 449 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I’m excited to be joined by Jackie Goldschneiderwho speaks to me about eating disorders, body image, recovery, and how all of this intersects with sexuality and pleasure.In this conversation, Jackie shares the raw, unglamorized realities of living with anorexia for two decades, much of it while in the public eye. We explore her “inherited food trauma,” the cultural pressure of the 90s, and how secrecy, rules, and constant tracking kept her illness alive. Jackie opens up about the pivotal moment at 45 when health scares and a second rock bottom pushed her to choose recovery, tell her husband, and assemble a true treatment team to address the mental, physical, and emotional layers of healing.Jackie Goldschneider is an author, activist, speaker and a longtime cast member of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.  Before joining the show, Jackie was an attorney and freelance journalist, and has contributed extensively to publications including Good Housekeeping, HuffPost and Scary Mommy, and wrote a weekly parenting column for New Jersey's The Record newspaper for several years. Her debut memoir, The Weight of Beautiful, was published by ‎Simon and Schuster in September 2023. Since then, Jackie has been a nationally recognized advocate for eating disorder recovery.In this episode, you will hear:·      Inherited Food Trauma And Early Body Shame·      Fifteen Years Of Anorexia Hidden In Plain Sight·      Strategic Eating To Outsmart Cameras And Castmates·      Recovery As A Lifelong, Nonlinear Commitment·      Malnutrition’s Toll On Hormones, Estrogen, And Libido·      Therapy, Dietitian, And MD: A Three-Person Care Team·      Boundaries Around Body And Food Comments Are Essential·      Reclaiming Pleasure, Playfulness, And Nakedness In Sex·      Breaking Secrecy By Confiding In A Loved One Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Spice Up Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

29 Heinä 31min

EP448 - Connection and Pleasure: Reclaim Lost Desire

EP448 - Connection and Pleasure: Reclaim Lost Desire

Welcome to Episode 448 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Dr. Kate Balestrieri, who speaks to me about navigating low desire and reigniting intimacy in long‑term relationships.In this conversation, Kate and I normalize the reality that everyone, including sex therapists, experiences fluctuations in sexual desire. She shares the multifaceted story behind her own temporary drop in libido, touching on burnout, perimenopause, pandemic stress, and relationship “growing pains.” Dr. Kate Balestrieri, Psy.D is a Licensed Psychologist (Clinical and Forensic) in CA, FL, NY and IL. She is a Certified Sex Therapist, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist – Supervisor, and PACT III trained couples’ therapist. The Founder of Modern Intimacy, a nationwide therapy practice, Dr. Balestrieri is a passionate advocate for mental, relational and sexual health. Throughout her work, Dr. Balestrieri focuses on helping people build resilience and recovery from what ails them to move from a position of pain or discomfort to one of thriving, holistically in their lives. Dr. Balestrieri is the author of What Happened to My Sex Life? A Sex Therapist’s Guide to Reclaiming Lost Desire, Connection and Pleasure, and is the host of the Get Naked with Dr. Kate podcast.In this episode, you will hear:·      Normalizing Fluctuating Desire·      Multifaceted Roots Of Low Libido·      Love–Lust Divide In Long‑Term Bonds·      Stress And Burnout As Desire Dampeners·      Role Of Novelty And Mystery·      Dangers Of Obligatory Or “Pity” Sex·      The 30% Orgasm Gap Explained·      Embodiment And Pleasure Practices·      Rekindling Passion With Intentional Effort It’s back, our L.A. Love Lab – Matchmaking Event! Happening Saturday, October 4, 2025 in Manhatten Beach, California with Dr. Moali and Dr. E…we hope you can join us and let us work our matchmaking magic on you! Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Upgrade Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

22 Heinä 26min

EP447 - The Mother of Sex Coaching: Wanting Love, Finding Yourself

EP447 - The Mother of Sex Coaching: Wanting Love, Finding Yourself

Welcome to Episode 447 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Dr. Patti Britton, who speaks to me about her new memoir Chasing Sex, the life events that shaped her as a pioneer in sex coaching, and how we can all cultivate pleasure and transcendent intimacy at any age.In this heartfelt conversation, Patti traces the winding path from her “little girl named Patti” to the globally known “Dr. Patti.” She opens up about the matriarchs who modeled sexual confidence, the traumas she survived, and the counter-culture influences that called her to sexology. You’ll hear how writing her memoir became a race against time to preserve her stories, and why she now gifts readers “52 Lessons for Life” drawn from those pages.Dr. Patti Britton is a nationally board-certified, world recognized Clinical Sexologist, known as the “Mother of Sex Coaching”. She’s the author of hundreds of articles, book chapters, forewords, and five major books in sexology. She is a proud member of the LA writers’ community, having studied Method Writing for over 20 years. She is published in several anthologies with a variety of her stories. Her memoir, Chasing Sex, Wanting Love, Finding Myself was released in 2024 from Balboa Press.In this episode, you will hear:·      Dr. Patti Britton’s Matriarchal Role Models·      From Trauma to Thriving: Finding an Authentic Sexual Voice·      Why She Wrote Chasing Sex in Her Seventies·      Pleasure Framed as a Fundamental Human Right·      The Five-Level Touch Continuum Explained·      Transcendent Sex vs. “Good Enough” Sex·      Aging, Orgasm, and Embracing New Erotic Scripts·      Tips for Men: Shift From Performance to Sensation·      Keeping Desire Alive Through Novelty and Play·      Patti’s Free “52 Lessons for Life” and Ongoing Legacy It’s back, our L.A. Love Lab – Matchmaking Event! Happening Saturday, October 4, 2025 in Manhatten Beach, California with Dr. Moali and Dr. E…we hope you can join us and let us work our matchmaking magic on you! Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Upgrade Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on InstagramPodcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

15 Heinä 48min

EP446 -  Feminist Porn: Producing Pleasure

EP446 - Feminist Porn: Producing Pleasure

Welcome to Episode 446 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I’m excited to be joined by Inka Winter, who speaks to me about her journey from surviving a sex cult to pioneering feminist, female-gaze erotica that centers women’s pleasure and authentic consent.Inka Winter is an erotic filmmaker and founder of ForPlay Films, an independent, all-woman porn production company. Spending her formative years living in an alternative artist commune in Austria gave Inka a critical eye for what constitutes sexy, consensual female pleasure and set the foundation for her creative endeavors in erotic filmmaking. Her background in costume design and styling informs her aesthetic and translates to the editorial feel of her films.In our conversation, Inka opens up about growing up in an Austrian commune that devolved into an authoritarian sex cult. She describes the rigid hierarchy, the separation of children from parents, and the constant pressure to conform to cult-mandated ideas of “free love.” We discuss the lingering impact of early exposure to sexual activity, the leader’s eventual arrest, and the complex process of unraveling trauma, reclaiming agency, and seeking reparations decades later.In this episode, you will hear:·      Childhood In Authoritarian Sex Cult·      Leader’s Arrest & Commune Collapse·      Processing Trauma Through Therapy·      Documentary Mirror Of Lived Reality·      From Fashion Design To Erotic Filmmaking·      Defining The Female Gaze On Screen·      Consent-Driven, Performer-Led Scenes·      Holistic Porn As Sex Education·      Debunking Porn “Addiction” Myths·      Empowering Women’s Pleasure & Fantasy Free Resources for Your Erotic Awakening: If you are searching for Dr. Moali’s recommendations for steamy reads, erotic audio, and ethical porn that will help you feel sexually energized, this is for you.Book an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Upgrade Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

8 Heinä 41min

EP445 - How to Have Mindful Masturbation

EP445 - How to Have Mindful Masturbation

Welcome to Episode 445 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I'm excited to be joined by Darshana Avila, who speaks to me about mindful masturbation as a form of self-care and erotic exploration. In this conversation, Darshana and I dive into why so many of us default to the same quick, goal-oriented masturbation routine and how that habit is wired into our neural pathways. We explore the power of slowing down, setting an intention, and treating solo pleasure as a ritual, complete with an opening, body-centered exploration, and a conscious closing.Best known for her contributions to Netflix's Sex, Love & goop, trauma informed,pleasure centric, culturally relevant erotic education is Darshana's sweet spot. Supporting women & queer community, individually or alongside their partners, is her deepest passion She's a certified Somatic Experiencing Practitioner & Sexological Bodyworker, guiding & serving through her private practice, public speaking & online offerings.In this episode, you will hear:·      Defining Mindful Masturbation·      Neural Pathways And Habit Loops·      Intentional Rituals For Solo Sex·      Full-Body Touch Before Genitals·      Navigating Boredom And Plateaus·      Sensate Focus Vs. Visual Stimulation·      Fantasy As A Creative Arousal Tool·      Scheduling Familiar And New Practices·      Challenging Inner Critic Narratives·      Pleasure As Personal And Collective Liberation Check out our YouTube for new videos dropping twice a weekBook an Appointment with Dr. Moali  Upgrade Your Social Media Feed AND Your Sex Life: Follow Us on Instagram Podcast Produced by Vaudeo ProductionsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

1 Heinä 38min

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