#221: How to Let Go of Someone You Love (For Anxious Attachers)

#221: How to Let Go of Someone You Love (For Anxious Attachers)

Letting go of someone you love can feel like the hardest thing you’ll ever do — especially if you have anxious attachment patterns. When your nervous system equates connection with safety, walking away can feel more intolerable than staying in pain.

In this episode, I explore why letting go is so difficult, and what actually helps when love, attachment, and fear are all tangled together.

I talk about:

  • Why anxious attachment makes holding on feel safer than letting go
  • How we often confuse feelings with instructions for action
  • Why waiting to “feel ready” or to stop loving someone keeps us stuck
  • The crucial distinction between love and compatibility
  • Why letting go isn’t a feeling — it’s a choice you make again and again
  • How grief, discomfort, and longing are part of the process, not signs you’ve made a mistake

This episode is both a pep talk and a reality check — an invitation to trust yourself enough to choose what’s right for you, even when it hurts, and even when you still love them.

If you’re navigating a breakup or struggling to let go, be sure to check out my free breakup training: https://www.stephanierigg.com/break-up-webinar

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#248: How to Cope With My Ex Being Happy in a New Relationship (Ask Steph)

#248: How to Cope With My Ex Being Happy in a New Relationship (Ask Steph)

In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re talking about how to cope when your ex seems to have moved on soon after your break-up — and is now in a new relationship that appears to be working.This can be an ...

9 Huhti 11min

#247: Is It Your Anxious Attachment... or the Wrong Relationship?

#247: Is It Your Anxious Attachment... or the Wrong Relationship?

In today’s episode, we’re unpacking one of the most common (and confusing) questions for people with anxious attachment: is it me, or is there something genuinely not right in this relationship?When y...

7 Huhti 14min

#246: When Is It a Good Idea to Be Friends with an Ex? (Ask Steph)

#246: When Is It a Good Idea to Be Friends with an Ex? (Ask Steph)

In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re exploring a common question: is it ever a good idea to be friends with an ex?While staying connected can sometimes feel comforting after a breakup, it’s not always ...

2 Huhti 8min

#245: Should Anxiously Attached People Just Avoid Avoidants?

#245: Should Anxiously Attached People Just Avoid Avoidants?

In today’s episode, I’m unpacking why I don’t give the common advice for anxiously attached people to simply avoid avoidant partners.While it might seem like a straightforward way to protect yourself ...

31 Maalis 10min

#244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph)

#244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I’m responding to a question I hear more often than you might expect. Someone has done a lot of work on their anxious attachment patterns, they feel more grounded and secure...

26 Maalis 7min

#243: How to Create Healthy, Balanced Relationships with Nedra Glover Tawwab

#243: How to Create Healthy, Balanced Relationships with Nedra Glover Tawwab

In this episode, I’m joined by therapist, bestselling author, and boundaries expert Nedra Glover Tawwab for a powerful conversation on what it really means to have healthy dependency in our relationsh...

24 Maalis 43min

#242: When Does Self-Improvement Become Self-Sabotage? (Ask Steph)

#242: When Does Self-Improvement Become Self-Sabotage? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I respond to a listener question about the fine line between personal growth and the endless pursuit of self-improvement.While healing, reflection, and growth are powerful t...

19 Maalis 6min

#241: How to Date from Self-Worth

#241: How to Date from Self-Worth

Modern dating can be tough. Between apps, ghosting, and the uncertainty that often comes with meeting strangers outside our social circles, the whole process can be seriously activating — and all the ...

17 Maalis 17min

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