The Hidden Cost of Being the Selfless One

If the word “selfish” makes you uncomfortable… this episode is for you. In this conversation, Zoe is joined by Suzy Reading for a deeply reassuring exploration of what mothers truly need – and why self-care alone is often insufficient. Together, they talk about how so many women have been conditioned to put themselves last, why resting, saying no or asking for help can feel so hard, and how unmet needs often show up as guilt, resentment or snapping at the people we love most. Suzy shares the thinking behind her new book How to Be Selfish, gently reframing “selfishness” as self-advocacy – and offers simple, practical ways to reconnect with yourself, calm your nervous system and let yourself matter too. In this episode, you’ll learn about: Why self-care alone isn’t enough – and how learning to receive care changes everything How motherhood and conditioning pull us away from our own needs (and why that matters) Why guilt, resentment and “shouty mum” moments are signals, not failures Simple, compassionate ways to reconnect with yourself and remember that you matter too 💛 This is a compassionate, validating listen for any mother who feels stretched thin, disconnected from herself, or quietly carrying too much. Remember to subscribe to Motherkind — it helps more mothers find the show and keeps our community growing. Feeling different since becoming a mother? Get clarity on who you’re becoming now and download your FREE Matrescence Cheat Sheet If you liked this episode, listen to this next: 100s of self-care practices tested and the ones that work with The Self Care Club Connect with Zoe: Follow Zoe on Instagram Get Zoe’s Sunday Times bestselling book, 'Motherkind: A New Way to Thrive in a World of Endless Expectations’ This Motherkind episode is sponsored by: Headline sponsor Wild Nutrition, the brand raising the bar for women’s supplements. Want to feel the Food-Grown difference yourself? Get 50% off for three months at wildnutrition.com/motherkind. Ts and Cs apply. For a £100 sponsored job credit, visit Indeed.com/ Motherkind Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices