252. "I’m 35, in debt, and spend everything I make"

252. "I’m 35, in debt, and spend everything I make"

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich talks to Lina, 35, and Mike, 28, a married couple living in South Florida with their 8-month-old son. Despite earning almost $200,000 annually, they've been entangled in debt since their wedding three years ago. They consistently make plans to conquer their financial woes but never follow through. Their debt has soared to over $750,000, and their fixed costs devour 98% of their take-home pay, leaving them with zero savings. Lina attributes their financial struggles to unexpected events, like her pregnancy, which led to her cutting back on work and an increased focus on comfort and convenience, regardless of the cost. Mike, an accountant, has largely deferred to Lina, resulting in a fractured approach to their shared finances. They both use "comfort" as a justification for their spending, avoiding "sacrifice," yet this mindset is driving them toward a financial cliff. Can Ramit help them confront their real numbers, bridge their communication gap, and finally unite as a financial team to build a rich life? In this episode we uncover: • Why Lina's comfort-first approach to spending is unsustainable • Mike’s "happy wife, happy life" approach to finances • The shocking reality of their $750,000 debt despite a high income • How Mike's "accountant" background has not helped their personal finances • The startling hidden costs of their lifestyle choices • Lina's upbringing with generational wealth and its impact on her money mindset • Mike's immigrant experience and its influence on his spending habits • The unspoken divide in their financial expectations and responsibilities • Ramit's direct challenge to their "comfort over sacrifice" mentality • A dramatic suggestion to overhaul their financial situation • Their raw and vulnerable discussion about making tough decisions • The moment Mike and Lina finally confront their financial reality Chapters: (00:00:00) Introduction (00:04:01) "We make plans and we never follow through" (00:09:00) Understanding their "comfort vs. sacrifice" mentality (00:18:40) Mike's "happy wife, happy life" approach (00:34:50) Unpacking their debt (00:40:11) "If we're a plane, we're about to crash" (00:46:00) Lina's privileged upbringing & generational wealth (01:00:21) Mike's immigrant story and mom's sacrifices (01:26:02) Confronting their high fixed costs and potential solutions (01:17:01) Mike and Lina's dramatic confrontation about spending habits (01:21:00) The power of a shared vision for their future (01:32:14) Follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: Leesa | Go to https://leesa.com for 20% off mattresses PLUS get an extra $50 off with promo code RAMIT, exclusive for my listeners LMNT | Get a free 8-count Sample Pack with any LMNT order at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT DeleteMe | Get 20% off all consumer plans when you go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit and use promo code RAMIT at checkout Factor | Go to https://factormeals.com/ramit50OFF and use code RAMIT50OFF to get 50% off your first box, plus free breakfast for 1 year ZocDoc | Go to https://zocdoc.com/ramit to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Get Money Coaching with Ramit • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you or your partner get stressed spending $150 on dinner, or are covering up spending, I’d like to help. Apply to be coached for free on this podcast at iwt.com/apply

Jaksot(259)

10. “Money is overwhelming so we find instant gratification elsewhere”

10. “Money is overwhelming so we find instant gratification elsewhere”

Jacques and Jennifer are stuck in a money rut. They are trapped by their $40,000 debt. Jennifer feels overwhelmed with money talk, and Jaques doesn't want to say no to his wife. When he comes home fro...

21 Syys 202145min

9. “I hid thousands of dollars of credit card debt from my husband”

9. “I hid thousands of dollars of credit card debt from my husband”

Jordan wasn't raised to talk about money. She constantly saw her mom withhold money matters from her dad, and now, history is repeating itself. Jordan has hidden her debt from her husband, Dan, twice....

14 Syys 202142min

8. “My wife is spending too much money”

8. “My wife is spending too much money”

Natalia prioritizes experiences over finances. She doesn’t want to miss out on life, so if she wants to visit her family, she doesn’t wait to check their budget -- she gets on a plane. Andres, on the ...

7 Syys 202145min

7. “My parents keep expecting us to pay for them”

7. “My parents keep expecting us to pay for them”

Barry is a first-generation Pakistani immigrant. His wife, Maria, is also Pakistani and was born and raised in the United States. Cultural expectations are making it difficult to get aligned on their ...

31 Elo 202147min

6. “We can’t afford to live in NYC, but my wife doesn’t want to leave the city”

6. “We can’t afford to live in NYC, but my wife doesn’t want to leave the city”

Jessica grew up wealthy in New York City. She can't imagine her life anywhere that's not within walking distance to the coffee shop, the best schools, and her parents (who live two blocks away). Her h...

24 Elo 202146min

5. “I paid off $50,000 of debt, but I still feel guilty buying toothpaste”

5. “I paid off $50,000 of debt, but I still feel guilty buying toothpaste”

Sheena has paid off a huge chunk of her student debt. Peter wants to plan a trip to Japan for their 10th anniversary and decorate their apartment, but Sheena’s first reaction is, “How will we afford i...

17 Elo 202137min

4. “My wife didn’t know I had $450,000 of debt until yesterday”

4. “My wife didn’t know I had $450,000 of debt until yesterday”

John has a lot of debt. Wendy knew about the $450k he owed when they started their relationship, over ten years ago, but she only found out what the current number is the day before their call with me...

10 Elo 202149min

3. “My husband is going broke, but he won’t let me help”

3. “My husband is going broke, but he won’t let me help”

Calvin feels he needs to be the “man of the house” and pay for everything. There’s just one problem: He can’t afford it. Every month he’s in the red, leading him to be anxious around money. Chantha li...

6 Elo 202146min

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