SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

Tonight the Swingset opens the mailbag... but does so carefully, as it's -20F outside. Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Bex Caputo, and Lunabelle answer your listener questions!

Question 1:

My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. We have amazing sex, but I can't seem to get satisfied sexually. We have sex/oral sex at least twice a day, but it seems like the more I orgasm, the more I crave it. He's slightly below average size, and I don't have any problems with his size because he knows what to do with it, but he's very self-conscious about his size. I'd love to bring up the topic of polyamory to him, but I'm afraid he'll feel like I want to do it just to be with someone bigger. In fact, I'm 100% positive that is what he would think. I've always felt that I might be bisexual. I'm fascinated with being with a woman, but I don't know how he'll react. Of course, it's every guys fantasy to have a threesome, but because of his self-consciousness, I don't think he'd be interested. I won't lie, being with someone bigger is also a curiosity of mine. He has a phobia (?) of someone bigger changing the way my vagina feels to him, so even if he were interested in swinging, I don't think he'd want me to be with another man.

I love him very much, but I feel like there are a lot of things I want to experience and I'm not getting any younger (I'm 36). I don't want to break up over it, because I'm very happy with him, but I'd also like to see what his thoughts are about it. How can I bring it up in a subtle, non-threatening way that might make him more interested?

Question 2:

My spouse and I are considering divorce. We love each other so much, but 15 years of marriage has left it's scars. We both have other partners, and breaking up with them, or closing our relationship at all is not on the table. These relationships are long standing, and breaking up would hurt multiple people and breed resentment. Besides, the openness of our relationship is not the issue. Do you have any advice for maintaining secondary relationships while the primary is in trouble? How to maintain boundaries when your whole life is up in the air?

Hope that's not too long! I love your podcast, and I especially love listening to it at work, where everyone thinks I'm a sweet normal and slightly boring office manager.

Question 3:

We are always taught to think of ourselves as being sexy but we won't look at ourselves and imagine ourselves as being sexy individuals. One of the problems that I've seen recently is you look at profiles or even advertise it for things even the desire takeover is we talked a get-together of sexy people or people say we are looking for other sexy couples.

The man that couples look it up and see that she is a BBW or I am a short chunky guy we no longer fit that is sexy category and both know hurts her feelings hurt our feelings.

Why is it that BBW it's almost turned into a niche versus just a description of an individual? It's almost like you're not an individual you're a BBW so you don't fit into this category and I've seen this very very bad in the swingers world.

So my question would be for you all is have you seen this how open are you to BBWs in your opinion of BBWs and how suggestion would you make to BBWs to get themselves more confident comfortable and energetic about the lifestyle itself?

Lunabelle mentioned her post, "I Like Big Toys and I Cannot Lie".

Ginger mentioned the Unfuckwithable video.

Dylan mentioned Elle Chase's book, Curvy Girl Sex .

Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this 2019 for Life on the Swingset's eighth trip to Desire! Visit swingsetdesire.com for more information!

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will get you invited to a private chat with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings, and listen to episodes commercial free, and with outtakes!

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

Dylan Thomas is available for for podcast consultation and production work. If you're interested, visit www.dylanthethomas.com.

Jaksot(431)

SS 113: CatalystCon East Decompression - Sexy Parties, Porn Stars, and Prostate Orgasms!

SS 113: CatalystCon East Decompression - Sexy Parties, Porn Stars, and Prostate Orgasms!

We all had unique experiences at CatalystCon East, we met different people, attended different sessions, sucked different cocks, cuddled with different people, met with various porn stars, and created our own breakthrough moments. We also passed up an opportunity to use the latest Njoy prototype. We truly are horrible people. Also, the hotel couldn't wait to rid themselves of our presence. We made so many friends over the weekend, why couldn't the hotel staff be some of them? Oh Cooper, my mistake, you DID make a friend over a discussion about anal play. Well done. Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Check out these Black Dragon ZERO Nitrile Gloves for latex-FREE goodness! Follow @CatalystCon on Twitter and check out #ccon Follow @thedylanryan on Twitter Follow @Wylddelirium on Twitter and check out #ccontrans Follow @Hernando_Chaves on Twitter and check out #cconmale When bad science kills, or how to spread AIDS (References to the flawed Male Circumcision studies)

11 Huhti 20131h 8min

SS 112: CatalystCon East Decompression - From Boy Kissing to Blanket Forts

SS 112: CatalystCon East Decompression - From Boy Kissing to Blanket Forts

We all had unique experiences at CatalystCon East, we met different people, attended different sessions, kissed different boys, assembled different blanket forts, and... occasionally we all got in the hot tub together, sat in the lounge together, and you know... gave our presentation. We spend the time chatting about all that stuff with a little touch of lament at the end for what could have been if for not being limited to sixty minutes. Boy, it sure is a good thing we don't have to worry about that here, right? ...   right? Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Check out this Hemp Bondage Rope by Lover's Knot! Follow @CatalystCon on Twitter

5 Huhti 20131h 10min

SS 111: In Bed With the Swingset II - Recorded Live at CatalystCon East

SS 111: In Bed With the Swingset II - Recorded Live at CatalystCon East

Cooper, Ginger, Shira, Dylan, Miko, Ophilia, and The Professor (tm) all get in one hotel room before their CatalystCon East session, hop on a couple beds, drink some wine, and have a casual conversation of how much they love each other in this episode of Life on the Swingset, The Podcast! We discuss how consistently impressive Ginger's panty selection is, and we touch... just barely touch on some of the mail that we've received and responded to, while Dylan falls completely off his rocker and rants about religion and politics the likes of which you've never heard on this podcast. If it helps, it's surrounded by heaping amounts of sexiness, flogging, under the shirt play, plenty of flirting, and a very, -very- unhappy Cooper Beckett. Are you not entertained!? Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Follow @CatalystCon on Twitter A New Inquisition: The Vatican targets US nuns

1 Huhti 20131h 32min

SS 110: Sex With Benefits: Progressive Swinging, Recorded Live at CatalystCon East!

SS 110: Sex With Benefits: Progressive Swinging, Recorded Live at CatalystCon East!

We attended CatalystCon East last week. CatalystCon, as described by Dee Dennis the founder and creator, is a conference created to inspire exceptional conversations about sexuality. It is about reaching out and stimulating those who attend to create those important conversations in their own communities, changing how we as a society talk and treat sexuality.  It is about stimulating the activist that is within all of us and sparking transformation in the way our friends, neighbors, children and even politicians discuss one of the most important aspects of humanity. In our session titled; Sex With Benefits: Progressive Swinging, we define progressive swinging, explain why we describe ourselves and our style of swinging as progressive swinging, and state its overarching goal: To unite the various non-monogamous communities under one larger community. We may not all speak as one, but we can be there for each other and work towards the kind of acceptance the LGBT community fought so long and hard for. Also Ginger gets flustered and loses her thoughts easily. Dylan "explainabrags" more. Cooper talks about being an accidental activist. Shira plays the role of "token poly snarky girl". Enjoy the live recording of our session! Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Follow @CatalystCon on Twitter

25 Maalis 20131h 12min

SS 109: Reflections on Swingset Kinkery

SS 109: Reflections on Swingset Kinkery

We brought Miko Technogeisha on for a discussion on our own personal kinks, and... ended up derailed when Dylan inevitably decided to use Ginger's bedroom habits for his own personal scene. Upon attempting to get back on track Cooper sets up a second scene involving some fictional magical characters at a fictional wizardry school and...  Ginger steps out for a few! After the break we go into what it can feel like for a "less kinky" person to encounter a "very kinky" person and all around just chat about how much fun it can be, to be kinky. [powerpress] Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Check out the Bondage Basics Leather Ankle Cuffs by Kink Lab! You can follow @technogeisha on twitter!

20 Maalis 20131h

SS Special - Cooper's Mea Culpa

SS Special - Cooper's Mea Culpa

My name is Cooper Beckett, and I am a loudmouth. I'm extremely opinionated, and I use my little podcast as a soap box for my opinions. I'm also a snarky bastard, who enjoys giving shit to all. Just ask Dylan. This weekend, I got two emails, both taking me to task for my grumpery. I have snarked about "breeders" because I have no interest in having children. I have never seen this term as an insult, and have no issue whatsoever with children, or those who bear them. I like kids, I like people with kids. As a definite minority amongst those in a family way, I will jab, but never with malice. And I will apologize for the term breeders. On two other topics, I have been called intolerant. That of the religious, and Republicans. I will admit to painting broad swaths of the religious with the same brush, the same can be said for my opinions and feelings about Republicans. I am an atheist and a Democrat, I have never hidden this fact. To our listeners who are religious, especially Christian, and to those who are Republican, I apologize for my often harsh words toward your affiliations. I recognize how strongly these beliefs can be held. I have often said that all beliefs should be tolerated, so long as they don't infringe on other people. Right now, my state of Illinois is moving forward to allow gay marriage. The only people to speak against it were the religious. Are there religious folk who are sex positive? Who promote freedom, equality, tolerance? Absolutely. Are there republicans who also espouse the same beliefs and strengths that I stand for? Definitely! I know many people that fit into one or both of these categories. They are my friends, they are my lovers, they are my family. I will never apologize, however, for my intolerance of intolerance. Rest assured, when I complain about the religious, I'm complaining about those who use their beliefs in God as a bludgeon for shaping policy that makes cohabitation without marriage illegal in Virginia, prohibits or impedes access to birth control, and by and large, keeps marriage equality from being a right for ALL Americans. I’m complaining about the institutionalized cover-up of thousands upon thousands of child sexual abuse cases in the Catholic church. When I complain about the Republicans, I complain about those who opposed the Violence against Women Act, who stand in the way of repealing the Defense of Marriage Act. And those responsible for all of the above God bludgeoning. These are not beliefs, this is intolerance. Beliefs are for you. Intolerance is for the world. I stand against those spreading blatant lies about contraception, and conception, about women’s bodies being able to shut down rape, about the validity of science, and a misconception of what the term “theory” actually means. Tolerance is a noble attribute, and one I strive for in myself with every person I encounter. I’m reasonably sure that the listeners of our podcast don’t fit into those categories that I am complaining about, and if they do, I would be very curious to hear them talk about how they reconcile these beliefs with their interest in our aberrant sexuality. But all that said, I adore my listeners, and the thought that I’ve upset or hurt anyone with my glib comments causes me pain, and again I apologize to them. Every word I speak that doesn’t have a citation should always be treated as my opinion, which is no more valid than any other opinion, even if mine is sometimes louder. To crib from our intro, I am most certainly biased, but I will always speak honestly and earnestly, and as a staunch defender of all safe, sane, and consensual sexual and relationship practices that occur between adults, I will never pull my punches. Thank you

13 Maalis 20134min

SS 108: Gang-Bang the Mailbag 7 - Politics, Time, Consent, & Swinging

SS 108: Gang-Bang the Mailbag 7 - Politics, Time, Consent, & Swinging

We're taking another dip into the calm waters of the lake of reader submitted questions for our seventh Gang-Bang the MailBag episode! After what seems like thirty minutes of business and random thought salad, we discuss being a discerning connoisseur of swing partners, trying to find time to really meet minds with a group of progressive swingers while having limited amounts of time, discussing the old #1 rule that women make the rules, and politics and self-selection in finding playmates. Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Check out the Stand-To-Urimate "Spoon" Packer STP!

5 Maalis 20131h 18min

SS 107: Parenting & Non-Monogamy: Sex Positive Parenting Continued with Guest Airial Clark

SS 107: Parenting & Non-Monogamy: Sex Positive Parenting Continued with Guest Airial Clark

Many of us in the lifestyle are parents and can sometimes feel alone when addressing issues regarding child development and age-appropriate ways of discussing sexuality. Airial Clark wowed us so much the last time she was on, we asked her to come back! Today, Dylan stumbles over trying to figure out how not to repeat the "find your father's pornos" way of discovering sexuality, Shira appreciates the depth of knowledge Airial has on non-monogamous households and the benefits and extra issues that come with it, while Cooper just cracks a few jokes and laughs about breeders. Check out the Smitten Kitten Online and use our discount code, "swingset" for a 10% discount! Check out the Stronic Eins Rechargeable Pulsator by Fun Factory. STRONIC EINS! Check out Airial Clark's site, The Sex-Positive Parent and follow her on Twitter @airialclark. Come see us at Catalyst East! RSVP via Facebook and let us know you're coming! Use Discount Code: swingset for 10& off your ticket!

25 Helmi 20131h 3min

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