SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

Tonight the Swingset opens the mailbag... but does so carefully, as it's -20F outside. Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Bex Caputo, and Lunabelle answer your listener questions!

Question 1:

My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. We have amazing sex, but I can't seem to get satisfied sexually. We have sex/oral sex at least twice a day, but it seems like the more I orgasm, the more I crave it. He's slightly below average size, and I don't have any problems with his size because he knows what to do with it, but he's very self-conscious about his size. I'd love to bring up the topic of polyamory to him, but I'm afraid he'll feel like I want to do it just to be with someone bigger. In fact, I'm 100% positive that is what he would think. I've always felt that I might be bisexual. I'm fascinated with being with a woman, but I don't know how he'll react. Of course, it's every guys fantasy to have a threesome, but because of his self-consciousness, I don't think he'd be interested. I won't lie, being with someone bigger is also a curiosity of mine. He has a phobia (?) of someone bigger changing the way my vagina feels to him, so even if he were interested in swinging, I don't think he'd want me to be with another man.

I love him very much, but I feel like there are a lot of things I want to experience and I'm not getting any younger (I'm 36). I don't want to break up over it, because I'm very happy with him, but I'd also like to see what his thoughts are about it. How can I bring it up in a subtle, non-threatening way that might make him more interested?

Question 2:

My spouse and I are considering divorce. We love each other so much, but 15 years of marriage has left it's scars. We both have other partners, and breaking up with them, or closing our relationship at all is not on the table. These relationships are long standing, and breaking up would hurt multiple people and breed resentment. Besides, the openness of our relationship is not the issue. Do you have any advice for maintaining secondary relationships while the primary is in trouble? How to maintain boundaries when your whole life is up in the air?

Hope that's not too long! I love your podcast, and I especially love listening to it at work, where everyone thinks I'm a sweet normal and slightly boring office manager.

Question 3:

We are always taught to think of ourselves as being sexy but we won't look at ourselves and imagine ourselves as being sexy individuals. One of the problems that I've seen recently is you look at profiles or even advertise it for things even the desire takeover is we talked a get-together of sexy people or people say we are looking for other sexy couples.

The man that couples look it up and see that she is a BBW or I am a short chunky guy we no longer fit that is sexy category and both know hurts her feelings hurt our feelings.

Why is it that BBW it's almost turned into a niche versus just a description of an individual? It's almost like you're not an individual you're a BBW so you don't fit into this category and I've seen this very very bad in the swingers world.

So my question would be for you all is have you seen this how open are you to BBWs in your opinion of BBWs and how suggestion would you make to BBWs to get themselves more confident comfortable and energetic about the lifestyle itself?

Lunabelle mentioned her post, "I Like Big Toys and I Cannot Lie".

Ginger mentioned the Unfuckwithable video.

Dylan mentioned Elle Chase's book, Curvy Girl Sex .

Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this 2019 for Life on the Swingset's eighth trip to Desire! Visit swingsetdesire.com for more information!

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will get you invited to a private chat with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings, and listen to episodes commercial free, and with outtakes!

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

Dylan Thomas is available for for podcast consultation and production work. If you're interested, visit www.dylanthethomas.com.

Jaksot(431)

SS 083: The Pick-Up In Non Monogamy with Cunning Minx

SS 083: The Pick-Up In Non Monogamy with Cunning Minx

The Pick-up, we discuss vanilla pick-up culture briefly while moving into how to be picked up, how to message people online, and meeting people in real life. The concept of a codex, or a user manual (RTFM!) for potential hookups and dating partners to use comes up and we spend a lot of time figuring out what goes into it and what it actually means. While we lose a Ginger this episode, we pick up a Cunning Minx and have a great time!   Minx's User Manual Cunning Minx on Twitter Polyamory Weekly Join the Swingset crew at Desire Resort & Spa from November 3-10, 2012!

6 Elo 20121h 10min

SS 082: Geeksexuality - Making Porn, Bisexual Males, Bush, & Quantum Physics

SS 082: Geeksexuality - Making Porn, Bisexual Males, Bush, & Quantum Physics

We are joined by Ned & Maggie Mayhem, geeksexual porn stars who's mantra is to just be themselves in porn. We gush over them a while, Cooper admits their site is the first porn site he's ever paid for. The discussion leads to making porn, bringing toys into the bedroom, male use of the Hitachi Magic Wand, male bisexuality in porn, and identifying as queer.

23 Heinä 20121h 7min

SS 081: Open SF Debrief III - Learning to Speak Up, Browsing SF, and a Farewell Lunch

SS 081: Open SF Debrief III - Learning to Speak Up, Browsing SF, and a Farewell Lunch

We finish our debrief from our experience at Open SF Non-Monogamy Conference. We discuss seminars we attended, Dylan laments falling asleep, Cooper explains how The Brown Eyed Girl took them all out for a spin around town and how he learned to ask for what he wants, we break in the middle for a little discussion on companies who take public stances on issues, and we end with a farewell lunch on Monday with Pepper Mint.

16 Heinä 201253min

SS 080: Open SF Debrief II - Magic Brownies, Presentations, Hot Tubs, Flirting, & Sex

SS 080: Open SF Debrief II - Magic Brownies, Presentations, Hot Tubs, Flirting, & Sex

We continue our debrief from our experience at Open SF Non-Monogamy Conference. We discuss seminars we attended, including Charlie Glickman, Tristan Taormino, and the presentation we gave. Cooper gets a magic brownie and tries to pick up a Brown-Eyed Girl, and talks about how incredibly charming The Professor is. The gang goes on a San Francisco odyssey to find a hot-tub in the hills, and Dylan gets a girl.

9 Heinä 20121h 4min

SS 079: Open SF Debrief I - Dom/sub, Sex Parties, & San Francisco

SS 079: Open SF Debrief I - Dom/sub, Sex Parties, & San Francisco

The gang begins their full debrief from the Open SF Non-Monogamy conference. Cooper experiences both Dom and sub play in a single night, and processes his feelings on Domination, humiliation, choking, as well as being flogged, spanked, and fondled. Dylan holds court and plays Cards Against Humanity with friends. Ginger and the Prof discover the fuck monster at the Pink Play Party. Shira brings a two boys to their first play party.

2 Heinä 201255min

SS 078: In Bed With The Swingset - Flirting, Drinking, Safe Words, A Sex Toy Box, & Chaos

SS 078: In Bed With The Swingset - Flirting, Drinking, Safe Words, A Sex Toy Box, & Chaos

The Swingset crew is drinking in bed together at the Open SF conference. For a good long while we giggle and talk of almost nothing. Dylan shamelessly flirts with the ladies. We move on to talking about Dom/sub play, and Cooper's fears getting into it. The discussion leads to relationship safe words and the Get Out of Jail Free Card in dealing with relationship conflict. We talk aftercare and then dig into Cooper's sex toy box while Dylan just wants to make out with Ginger's thigh.

23 Kesä 20121h

SS 077: Sex With Benefits – Progressive Swinging – Live From The Open SF Conference

SS 077: Sex With Benefits – Progressive Swinging – Live From The Open SF Conference

The Swingsetters are live in San Francisco at the Open SF Conference on non-monogamy to discuss Progressive Swinging, where swingers are gradually sliding down the spectrum toward long term relationships, and even !!GHASP!! love. We take questions from the audience and Cooper gets all riled up.

15 Kesä 201259min

SS 076: Gang-Bang The Mailbag III – Jealousy in Open Relationships

SS 076: Gang-Bang The Mailbag III – Jealousy in Open Relationships

We return to the mailbag, still full after last week to discuss a number of jealousy related issues. A newly poly girl is uncomfortable with her husband dating his monogamous ex girlfriend, what is the difference between different flavors of non-monogamy, is jealousy healthy, does it show your partner that you care?

4 Kesä 201251min

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