What BPD Identity Loss Actually Feels Like (and How We Rebuilt a Sense of Self)

How do you actually build a sense of self with BPD?

In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Carys, Solène, André, and Katja continue the conversation on identity, this time focusing on what’s helped us move toward a more stable sense of self. Still through the lens of the Alternative Model for Personality Disorders (AMPD), we’re looking at identity as something you can actively shape over time.

Under the AMPD, difficulties with identity are considered part of impairments in self functioning, alongside self-direction. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.

If you’ve ever felt empty, disconnected, or like you’re constantly reinventing yourself… this is the part where we talk about what starts to change that.

We talk about:

• how chronic emptiness and dissociation connect to identity

• relying on relationships or external validation to define who you are

• the difference between emptiness and boredom (and why that matters)

• finding purpose, values, and small anchors that make you feel more “real”

• learning who you are without labeling yourself as “broken”

• building identity through creativity, feedback, and lived experience

• integrating different parts of yourself instead of rejecting them

• why identity takes time and doesn’t form all at once

This is part of our Season 7 series where we’re breaking BPD down in a more real, human way while also connecting it to newer ways of understanding personality.

In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explained what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. If you missed them, check them out:

Part 1

Part 2

⸻

🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨

🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________

About Us:

The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!

________

Disclaimer:

This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.