Episode 163 - The Hidden People Pleasing of High Achievers

Episode 163 - The Hidden People Pleasing of High Achievers

There is a version of people-pleasing that hides behind competence, ambition, professionalism, and being the person everyone can count on. In this episode, I’m unpacking the patterns that show up in high achievers and what happens when competence becomes part of your identity. If the traits that brought you success are slowly starting to feel exhausting, it doesn’t mean you need to stop striving completely. It means there is a different way to experience achievement, one where you can be highly capable while also being supported, loved, helped, and truly known in reciprocal relationships. Here’s what I cover:


  • Why people pleasing in high achievers is often brushed off as “just being professional”
  • The childhood experiences that teach women that being useful is what makes them lovable
  • How competence can become a cage that leaves high-achieving women feeling lonely and resentful
  • The invisible contract women believe in when they keep overfunctioning and overdelivering
  • The sneaky ways people pleasing shows up through perfectionism and emotional responsibility
  • How to start supporting the younger part of you that learned that needing things was unsafe


Find Sara here:

sarafisk.coach

pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

instagram.com/sarafiskcoach

facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching

tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

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Episode 173 - The Motivational Triad: Why Avoiding the Hard Conversation Feels So Good

Episode 173 - The Motivational Triad: Why Avoiding the Hard Conversation Feels So Good

Is there a difficult conversation you know you need to have but keep putting off? You may have noticed that every time you decide to wait, you feel a little better even though you’re avoiding somethin...

19 Elo 30min

Episode 172 - Are Your Thoughts Keeping You Stuck?

Episode 172 - Are Your Thoughts Keeping You Stuck?

How often do you have thoughts like, "I hate doing this," "I'm bad at this," or "What's the point?" and brush them aside? We often push through our days without stopping to question the stories runnin...

29 Heinä 22min

Episode 171 - The Small People-Pleasing Behaviors That Add Up

Episode 171 - The Small People-Pleasing Behaviors That Add Up

Most women are familiar with what people-pleasing looks like. You say yes when you mean no, avoid conflict, or never ask for what you need. But some of the most exhausting people-pleasing doesn't happ...

22 Heinä 21min

Episode 170 - The People-Pleasing Conversation I Had With My Teenager

Episode 170 - The People-Pleasing Conversation I Had With My Teenager

People-pleasing tendencies start much earlier in life than many of us realize, and there comes a point when children need to begin unlearning those behaviors so they don't carry them into adulthood. I...

15 Heinä 19min

Episode 169 - What I’m Working On Right Now: What Will They Think of Me?

Episode 169 - What I’m Working On Right Now: What Will They Think of Me?

We all assume other people have it more figured out than we do. But beneath so many of our struggles is the same familiar good girl question: How am I going to be perceived? In this episode, I'm shari...

8 Heinä 19min

Episode 168 - What is Your Silence Teaching Your Relationships?

Episode 168 - What is Your Silence Teaching Your Relationships?

We often think of relationships as something we have: a marriage, a friendship, a relationship with our parents. But relationships are more like living things—they have their own patterns and ecosyste...

1 Heinä 17min

Episode 167 - The Skill That Improves Every Difficult Conversation

Episode 167 - The Skill That Improves Every Difficult Conversation

Most hard conversations don't start with an invitation. They start with something that sounds more like a verdict: You never listen to me. You don't respect my time. You don't care about my feelings. ...

24 Kesä 26min

Episode 166 - There is No Time Limit to Talk About It

Episode 166 - There is No Time Limit to Talk About It

How often do you finally realize what you want to say hours, days, months, or even years after a misunderstanding or disagreement? Some people need time to process, but it's easy to think you've misse...

10 Kesä 25min

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