My Happy Place Was When My Whole Family Was Asleep So I Could Finally Drink Properly — And Nobody Knew

Episode 65 | Ashley Howard — The Secret Drinker Nobody Suspected: A Straight A Student, a Fitness Coach & 3 Years Sober

In this compelling episode, Jimmy sits down with Ashley Howard — certified recovery coach, life coach, and health and fitness entrepreneur from South Carolina — whose story of secret, private drinking behind the perfect public image is one of the most quietly relatable the podcast has ever featured.

Ashley grew up in Pennsylvania as the daughter of a hard-working single mum who was rarely home. A straight A student, a sports star, always ticking the boxes — and from age 14, secretly drinking at parties on weekends, then going home and sliding back into her model student life as if nothing had happened. Nobody suspected a thing. That pattern — performing perfectly in public while crossing lines in private — would define the next two decades.

By 19 she was arrested for underage possession of alcohol. By 21 she had a DUI. Both were brushed under the carpet. She got the job anyway, met her husband on a work trip, built a thriving fitness coaching business, had two children — and quietly, steadily, shifted from social weekend binge drinking to something far more private and deliberate. Her happiest time of day became when her whole family was asleep and she could finally drink the way she actually wanted to drink. Two, three, four drinks every night, alone on the couch, protecting the image of the health and fitness coach who had it all together.

Then in one year, Ashley lost her brother to drug complications and her father to lung cancer from 40 years of smoking. Two deaths from preventable causes. And still she didn’t connect it to her own relationship with alcohol, because she told herself: I don’t do drugs. I don’t smoke. It took nine more years.

The turning point came on a trip to Scotland for a wedding — watching a friend who’d always been a big drinker thriving without alcohol and still being the life of the party. The voice in her head got loud. She came home, got through Christmas with family, and on January 8th 2023, sat down on the couch, turned to her husband, and said the words she’d been terrified to say out loud: I want to be done with alcohol forever. I’d like your help. They cleared the house that night.

She used the 75 Hard fitness challenge as her public cover story while she quietly did the inner work. Six weeks later she posted her story on Instagram. Then a few reels went viral — five million views — and her inbox was flooded with people saying this is my story too. She got certified as a recovery coach, built a free online community, and now helps women who look exactly like she did: healthy, driven, successful on the outside — and secretly dependent on alcohol to get through the night.

You can find Ashley on Instagram at:

https://amzn.eu/d/074zO5jE

And her website at:

https://www.ashleyhowardcoaching.com

Sober Motivation with Brad McLeod

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/sober-motivation-sharing-sobriety-stories/id1650658049

Annie Grace - This Naked Mind

https://amzn.to/4u1tK0n

Annie Grace - The Alcohol Experiment

https://amzn.to/43zCwrI

Laura McKowen - Push Off from Here

https://amzn.to/4uG2mGB

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.