Magpie Minds: Collecting, Obsessing and Regulating in Neurodivergent Kids with OCD

Today we are talking about OCD. For so many of us in neurodivergent families, “OCD” doesn’t look like a TV stereotype. It looks like dishwashers that have to be stacked just so, teddies arranged in invisible themes, and kids who can’t settle until every collection is complete. In this episode I sit down with my daughter Eva to explore our shared “operating system”: my dishwasher rules and Star Trek comic sets, her Builder Bears, dinosaurs and engine-obsessed brain, our two-week Minecraft phases, and the painful lessons of Roblox scams. I unpack what’s really going on underneath these quirks, and how you can start working with, not against, your child’s systems – protecting them online without shame, honouring their rituals without letting them run the house, and using shared special interests as one of the strongest bridges to connection in a neurodivergent family. EPISODE REVEALS Often, OCD acts as a regulating tool; it helps to bring order and control. It is a regulation tool rather than your child being difficult. Joining your child´s world instead of dismissing things as phases can help to bring you closer and gives you a chance to have fun collecting or playing together. Creative outlets are a good way for young people to express themselves, process experiences and regulate their emotions. A calm, peaceful home is not created by “fixing” behaviours, understanding what is going on in your child´s brain and adapting where needed works better, overall. BEST MOMENTS "If that is not done correctly, I can't even look in that drawer, which is weird because I'm quite messy person." "Our family hasn't been trying to fix each other. It's been taking the time to understand, adapt, to empathise, and to connect." "That deeper understanding has strengthened the bond between us, and I genuinely believe it's one of the biggest reasons we're as close as we are today." "It helps me regulate my emotions if I post something sad." RESOURCES Evas channel: https://youtube.com/shorts/vX4xOtMG95w?si=uqWJ-TF8zzWrRMIS Famisafe Parental control App Link: https://wondersharesoftware.pxf.io/ParentingAUDHD What to Do When Your Child Shuts Down: Real-World Parenting Strategies for Neurodivergent Kids Who Shut Down, Refuse School, or Just Stop communicating with you: https://amzn.eu/d/0fBIfbhR CLIFF´S SERVICES Are you struggling with anxiety and want support from someone who has been there and come out the other side? - Message Cliff here and take advantage of his founding members offer: https://m.me/cliff.kilmister CONTACT ME Instagram: @cliff_kilmister08 Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/cliff.kilmister X - @KilmisterCliff YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@ParentingAutismandADHD HOST BIO Cliff Kilmister is a dedicated parent, advocate, and cat whisperer with firsthand experience raising a child with autism, ADHD, and Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). Having navigated the challenges of school refusal, meltdowns, and sensory sensitivities, Cliff brings an empathetic, real-world perspective to the podcast. When he's not helping his child thrive, he’s dodging the evil stares of his three cats, who are plotting to take over the world (fortunately, they still haven’t figured out how to use the tin opener). Cliff offers practical advice, expert insights, and personal stories to help families facing similar struggles. Cliff is focused on connecting with professionals and networks to raise awareness about the growing need for the education system to adapt to the increasing neurodiverse population. Join the community on Patreon to share experiences, access exclusive content, and work together for change! This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/