Ask Uncut: Can I Date an Ex Con? Is Sugar Babying Cheating? & My Husband Won't Take Off His Onesie

Hey Lifers!
Welcome back to Ask Uncut, where we answer your deepest, darkest and burniest questions.
This week Laura kicks off with a nit-related trauma flashback (there may or may not be an epidemic).
Vibes & Unsubscribe

Britt - motion sickness setting. Go into your settings -> accessibility -> choose motion -> select Vehicle Motion Cues -> turn it on
Laura - unsubscribe from appliances that require apps
Vibe - Refa s carat face roller

Then we get into it:

Q1: CAN I DATE A CRIMINAL?
I work at a bank. About a year ago, this tall hot man came in; not objectively hot, but there was something about him, you know. He came to my counter, and when I asked for some ID, he said he didn't have any. I asked for a phone number, and he said he didn't have one. I asked for an address, which he also didn't have. Understandably, I was confused, and he went on to say that he had just gotten out of prison and needed help accessing his accounts. I was able to help him and he was very polite and very grateful. Of course, I went home and googled his name, but I couldn't find anything. Over the next month or so, he came in a bit as we were sorting through all his bank accounts. We would have a nice chat each time. He seemed like a really nice guy. Then I didn't see him for months, until… I was scrolling through Tinder one night last week and I saw him on there. He had liked me, so I liked him back. Now he has messaged me and said he would like to take me out for a drink. What do you think I should do?

For context, I'm 40 years old. I live in a regional town where the pool is very small. I was with my ex-husband for 20 years until a few years ago, when I found out he'd been having a year-long affair. I've worked on myself and I love my single life, so I'm not desperate to meet someone, but it's been three years now, so it would be nice if it was with the right person. I've dated here and there, but no one worth giving up my single life for yet. I also have two children, a tween and a teen, so they're quite independent now. I have never introduced anyone I've dated to them, and I would only do it if I knew it was really serious. My question is, should I go on a date with this guy not knowing what he was in prison for? If I do go out with him, do I have to ask what he was in prison for, or is it too risky? Help!

Q2: IS SUGAR BABYING CHEATING?
Is sugar babying cheating? I know the pod has dabbled in the wide realm of cheating and where each thing falls on the spectrum, so I would love your opinion on this. I personally think it is, but I am just an outsider looking in.

There is a girl I work with, and in the past, when she was single, she had done some sugar babying and had sugar daddies pay for some really expensive things for her. For example, cosmetic surgery (pop off, queen, to be honest). Now, apparently she had stopped when she started dating her current partner, though this can't be confirmed or denied, it's just her word. For a little background on her and her relationship: she moved away from her current partner to a different state for work at the beginning of this year, and he's going to be joining her next year. I have come to find out that since moving, she is sugar babying again. I did not find this out by admittance, but by another coworker finding her on a sugar-baby-seeking website. After discovering that, a lot of things that she's said or done started to become a little clearer, and it's obvious she's doing it again. I can guarantee the boyfriend does not know about this. Also for context, I don't have any idea what the depths of her sugar babying are. I'm pretty sure she's been on some dates since being in the new state; however, I'm unsure if anything physical has happened , just dates, or even just online stuff.
Is this cheating, or is some aspect of it fine?

Q3: MY HUSBAND SAYS HE NEEDS A "RESET" BEFORE HAVING KIDS
My husband and I are in our mid-30s and have been together since uni. The last six years have been relentless, moving home from Europe during Covid, buying at the peak of the market, significant financial stress, family conflict over property, and now infertility. We're both emotionally exhausted. He still wants children but says he doesn't feel the same desperation to have them anymore, and he feels he needs a "reset" before becoming a parent. I understand he's burnt out, but I am terrified of waiting. I have suggested taking a break from work or seeing a therapist, but he won't commit to either. I feel stuck between respecting that he needs space and feeling like time won't be on our side if we spend too long in indecision from not doing IVF. How do we navigate this without ending up resentful of each other?

Q4: AM I THE ASSHOLE FOR HATING MY HUSBAND'S ONESIE?
This is a bit of a silly one, but genuinely wondering if I am the asshole for hating my husband's onesie. I know they're super popular and warm, and Aussie homes are not great for winter, but oh my god, my husband literally lives in his fucking onesie. He gets all dressed up for work, which I love, and then within two seconds of getting home, he's in his onesie with no shirt underneath and just a pair of tracks. He sleeps in his onesie, does the whole breakfast routine with our kids in it, and gets ready for work 15 minutes before leaving the house and then he's back in his onesie within five seconds of coming home again in the evening. Also, the added laundry headache with his incessant wearing of it is a pain in the ass because he won't wash it. He knows I hate it, but he just says he's cosy. He definitely has other warm home clothes. I even got him thermal tops to wear under his usual hoodie. It gives me the ick so bad, and I'm finding my husband less attractive because all he wears is a onesie. How do I get over this?

Timestamps

• 0:00 — Intro: the great nit epidemic debate & a hairdresser horror story
• 6:00 — Vibes & Unsubscribes
• 14:48 — Q1: Can I date a criminal? A bank teller, a man fresh out of prison & a Tinder match
• 24:46 — Q2: Is sugar babying cheating if it happened before the relationship?
• 36:28 — Q3: My husband needs a "reset" before we have kids — after 6 brutal years
• 47:56 — Q4: Am I the asshole for hating my husband's onesie?

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