34. The Father Wound: Body, Money and Love with Nicolas Canon

In this episode, I'm joined by Nicolas Canon, international teacher and best-selling author and teacher of grounded spirituality and relationship wisdom.

In this conversation, we go deep into the father wound: the stories, fears and conditioning we build as children in reaction to how our father showed up. Nicolas explains why the wound is rarely about what dad did and almost always about who we decided to become because of it, from the shy kid who shrinks to the tough guy who armours up.

We explore how the father wound shows up in the body, from lower back pain to autoimmune conditions, and why money slips through your fingers when there is no container to hold it.

We look at why women who grew up with angry fathers so often choose the nice guy, what happens to respect and polarity when there is too much pleasing, and why a people-pleasing man cannot lead.

Nicolas shares how his own marriage recreated his parents' marriage, and why every relationship dance is co-created.

We speak about the difference between repair and reconciliation, why "you are the perfect father for me" is the foundation of healing, and an exercise to find the strength hiding in everything you judge about your parents.

We also touch on why overthinking is a symptom of under-feeling, and why the search for God, gurus and religion is so often a search for the father.

This is a grounded, honest and deeply human conversation, with plenty of laughter and some tender moments. A story of abuse is shared in the middle of the episode, so please take care of yourself while listening.

Please let us know what you thought of this conversation.

Join Nicolas's Heal the Father Wound workshop on October 22nd:

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About Leen S:

Leen is a Belgian born, International Facilitator with traditional roots in yoga, tantra & conscious relating. She brings us closer to our bodies, our life force energy and a new way of relating through heart healing and soul recognition.

Her magic lies in being a shameless permission slip for eros and joy to awaken in all. Leen stands for conscious relationships where emotional maturity, safety and vulnerability meet the fire of passion.

As a certified Sex, Love and Relationship VITA coach, breath-work facilitator and 500 hours certified tantric Hatha Yoga Teacher, Leen has been guiding thousands of people to awaken to the power of their pleasure and orgasmic nature for the last 9 years.

Chapters:

00:00 Welcome, Nicolas Canon, and a deep exhale

05:17 What the father wound really is (spoiler: not what dad did)

06:41 When love had to be earned

11:05 How the father wound lives in your body

17:16 Why money slips through your fingers

23:49 The shy guy and the steroid guy: same wound, different armour

26:20 Women, their fathers and the nice guy

31:29 Where polarity goes to die: too much pleasing

36:01 The way through: it is always co-created

40:32 Repair is not reconciliation (content note: abuse story)

43:33 "You are the perfect father for me"

47:59 What you judge most in your parents is your next level

58:22 How Nicolas recreated his parents' marriage

01:06:18 The bully, the victim and the tyrant who thinks he is the victim

01:08:06 The divorce conversation and the moment of fate

01:12:46 Truth liberates: the real definition of intimacy

01:18:12 Is the search for God really the search for the father?

01:23:56 The cosmic joke of being human: complete and still seeking

01:25:47 Where to find Nicolas