EP377 - Boosting Confidence and Intimacy: Strategies for Improving Self-Image

Welcome to episode 228 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Leonor de Oliveira, MSc to the podcast. In this episode, Leonor de Oliveira speaks to me about the issue of sexual boredom, looking at hypersexuality and how infidelity can affect sexual boredom.     Leonor de Oliveira, MSc in Psychology, is a Clinical Psychologist credited by the Portuguese Board of Psychologists and Sexual Therapist by the Portuguese Society of Clinical Sexology. Currently integrates Porto University’s Centre for Psychology as a researcher, and the Doctoral Program in Human Sexuality as a student. Her main research topic is sexual boredom and its relationships with individual, relationship, and systemic aspects. She runs the social media account on Instagram @prontoadespir, where she promotes evidence based sexual education and advocates for sexual rights. Outside of the sexuality field she has mainly worked in the context of crisis intervention and short-term therapy in EAP settings.    * The literal translation of “Pronto a despir” is “ready to undress” - a word play with the French expression “Prêt-à-porter” that means “ready to wear”. This project started as a blog in 2014 and last year made its comeback on Instagram.    In this episode, you will hear:     How did Leonor become interested in sexual boredom?  The importance of love and connection   Creating space for passion and sexual excitement  How is sexual boredom defined?  The need to show up to help overcome sexual boredom   Looking at hyper sexuality   Why novelty and stimulation may not be enough to improve sexual boredom  The ways infidelity can affect sexual boredom   Discussion around the movie “Unas” and it’s portrayal of these issues       Find Leonor de Oliveira Online  https://www.instagram.com/prontoadespir      Free Masterclass  In this Masterclass we will:    Identify the main source of intimacy dissatisfaction in your relationship  We will first discuss the most common causes of intimacy dissatisfaction in relationships and then explore the roots of these issues.    Tackle your specific intimacy challenges  We will guide and walk you through addressing identified problems and explore the most effective ways to improve connection with your partner.    https://sexologypodcast.com/masterclass/      Giveaway  We have 5 copies of Dr Kerner’s new book to giveaway! To enter the competition and win a copy, simply subscribe to Sexology Podcast, write a review on iTunes, Stitcher etc and send a screenshot of the review to - https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast/.     Winners will be announced on our email newsletter on May 11th, 2021.      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

4 Touko 202136min

Welcome to episode 227 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome back Dr. Ian Kerner to the podcast. In this episode, Dr. Kerner talks to me about his new book; So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare and Learning to Repair Our Love Lives, overcoming psychological sexual rigidity, expanding into verbal foreplay and ways you can bring new sexual ideas to your partner.    Ian Kerner, PhD, LMFT is a licensed marriage and family therapist and nationally recognized sexuality counselor who specializes in sex therapy, couples therapy and working with individuals on a range of relational issues. Ian is the New York Times best-selling author She Comes First (Harper Collins), which has been translated into more than a dozen languages. He regularly consults for articles in major publications such as The Atlantic and The Economist, and he also writes on the topic of sex for CNN Health.     He is the co-director of the sex therapy program at the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy, one of New York's oldest and most respected not-for-profit mental health training and treatment facilities. In addition to being a Clinical Fellow of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT), Ian is certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists and he is also a member of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research (SSTAR) and The American Family Therapy Academy (AFTA). Ian was born and raised in New York City, where he maintains a private practice and lives with his wife and two sons, and their beloved dogs, Jitterbug and Oscar.     In this episode, you will hear:     How many couples can’t remember when asked, when the last time they had sex was  Can sexual chemistry be created if there’s never been much attraction?  Looking at psychological sexual rigidity  Learning to adapt and change your erotic template  The need to have good foreplay to allow for better sex  Expanding into verbal foreplay   Not setting yourself unrealistic expectations   How our busy lives effects our sexual well-being   Ways you can bring new sexual ideas to your partner  Understanding not to give up straight away and give things time  Knowing these issues are common and something everyone struggles with         Find Dr. Ian Kerner Online  https://www.iankerner.com      Free Masterclass  https://sexologypodcast.com/masterclass/    In this Masterclass we will  Define “Boredom” as it relates to your Intimate Life  We will explain the latest research findings on boredom in the bedroom as, more often than not, it is not as simple as feeling tired of monotonous routine. Identify the main source of intimacy dissatisfaction in your relationship  We will first discuss the most common causes of intimacy dissatisfaction in relationships and then explore the roots of these issues. Tackle your specific intimacy challenges  We will guide and walk you through addressing identified problems and explore the most effective ways to improve connection with your partner.    Giveaway  We have 5 copies of Dr Kerner’s new book to giveaway! To enter the competition and win a copy, simply subscribe to Sexology Podcast, write a review on iTunes, Stitcher etc and send a screenshot of the review to - https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast/.     Winners will be announced on our email newsletter on May 11th, 2021.      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

27 Huhti 202136min

Welcome to episode 226 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Dr. Nan Wise to the podcast. In this episode, Dr. Nan talks to me about her book, Why Good Sex Matters, how you can learn to access your pleasure and analyzing the difference between sexual stimulation and satisfaction.     Dr. Nan Wise is a certified sex therapist, certified relationship specialist, neuroscience researcher, and author of Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life. Driven by the desire to understand how the brain operates to create moods and behaviors, she returned to academia and completed her Ph.D. in 2014. Her dissertation work, Genital stimulation, imagery, and orgasm in women: an fMRI analysis, resulted in three published studies. Her research has addressed gaps in the scientific literature regarding the neural basis of human sexuality, and as a result, garnered international attention.    Dr. Nan's clinical approach addresses how the brain/body/mind operates, highlighting the key role that our evolutionarily wired-in, core, embodied emotions play in our physical and mental well-being. Imbalances in these core emotional systems contribute to anxiety, depression, stress-related disorders, and sexual dysfunction--all of which can impair our ability to experience pleasures- in and out of the bedroom.  This inability to experience satisfying pleasures-- the state of "anhedonia"- - contributes to what she has called the pleasure crisis, evidenced by soaring epidemics of mood disorders, stress-related illnesses, and a widespread sexual recession.  As Dr. Nan teaches, the ability to experience healthy pleasures--those that feel good and are good for us-- is not a luxury, but a necessity for overall well-being.     Dr. Nan has discussed the pleasure crisis on  The Today Show as well as contributed her expert opinion to outlets such as The BBC, National Geographic, The Atlantic, Time, Women’s Health, The Washington Post, HuffPost, Well + Good, Romper, Bustle, and has a regular column in Glamour, Ask Dr. Nan in which she addresses sexual health and relationship topics. She lives in West Orange, NJ.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Dr. Nan became interested in this field to write the book   Analyzing Anhedonia - The inability to feel pleasure  Learning to access your pleasure  Why your brain is your ally when improving your sexual pleasure  Looking at the difference between accessing pleasure and sexual pleasure  Overcoming low desire  Why some people are ambivalent towards pleasure  Fulfilling your sexual potential   The difference between stimulation and satisfaction       Find Dr. Nan Wise Online  https://askdoctornan.com      Free Masterclass  https://sexologypodcast.com/masterclass/    If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

20 Huhti 202135min

Welcome to episode 225 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Chris Germer, PhD to the podcast. In this episode, Dr. Germer talks to me about self-compassion, the power of kindness and how you can learn to let go of your expectations.    Chris Germer, PhD is a clinical psychologist and lecturer on psychiatry (part-time) at Harvard Medical School.  He co-developed the Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) program with Kristin Neff in 2010 and MSC has since been taught to over 150,000 people worldwide.  They co-authored two books on MSC, The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook and Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program.     Chris spends most of his time lecturing and leading workshops around the world on mindfulness and self-compassion.  He is also the author of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion; he co-edited two influential volumes on therapy, Mindfulness and Psychotherapy, and Wisdom and Compassion in Psychotherapy; and he maintains a small private practice in Arlington, Massachusetts, USA.    In this episode, you will hear:     What is self-compassion?   How most people are compassionate to others than themselves  How self-compassion is a skill anyone can learn   The importance of asking yourself – What do I need?  Looking at the shame spiral   How self-compassion is the antidote to shame   Why people who are self-compassionate experience better sexual satisfaction   How you can break your cycle and become self-compassionate   The power of kindness and how it empowers you   Why quick fixes “3 Steps to fix your sex life etc” are not congruent with self-compassion   Learning to let go of your expectations         Find Chris Germer, PhD Online  http://www.chrisgermer.com      Free Checklist - 25 Ways to Increase Desire  https://oasis2care.com/opt-in    If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

13 Huhti 202129min

Welcome to episode 224 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Dr. Jordan Tishler to the podcast. In this episode, Dr. Tishler tells us how he became interested in working with cannabis for sex, the impact it has on sexual experiences and the best ways you can pursue using medical cannabis.    Dr. Jordan Tishler is a Cannabis Specialist.  Through his training in Internal Medicine and years of practice as an Emergency Physician, Dr. Tishler brings his knowledge, reason, and caring to patients here at inhaleMD, and through his advocacy work at the local and national levels.     Dr. Tishler graduated from both Harvard College and Harvard Medical School, trained at the Brigham and Women’s Hospital, and is faculty at both the Brigham and Women’s Hospital and Harvard Medical School.  He has spent many years working with the underserved, particularly providing care for Veterans.  Having treated countless patients harmed by alcohol and drugs, his observation that he had never seen a cannabis overdose led Dr. Tishler to delve deeply into the science of cannabis safety and treatment.     Dr. Tishler is a frequent speaker and author on a variety of topics related to the medical applications of cannabis. He is the President of the Association of Cannabis Specialists which aims to educate clinicians, lawmakers, and the industry about best practices and needed tools for proper patient care.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Dr. Tishler became interested in this line of work   Can you be addicted to cannabis?  How we can reap the benefits of cannabis in a safe way   Is cannabis a gateway drug?  The impact cannabis has on sexual experiences   Looking at the different ways in can affect people   Why orgasms shouldn’t be the only goal for good sex  The difference between low libido and erectile dysfunction   Do CBD oils work?  The best ways you can pursue using medical cannabis         Find Dr. Tishler Online  https://inhalemd.com     Bedroom to Fizzle  I’m thrilled to announce a wonderful opportunity for Sexology's listeners. Bedroom Fizzle to Sizzle is a new course for couples I have been developing. Through this four-week, online program you will learn the skills needed to sexually reconnect with your partner and establish a lasting and fulfilling sex life. And from now until April 10th we are offering a chance for our listeners to become Founding Members.    Founding Membership includes:    Early access to the course  Private 20-minute one-on-one consultation with me, so we can tailor the course for your personal needs  For a limited time, get the course at the discounted price of $97, normally $197.00    This digital course will break the cycle of sexual avoidance and frustration for many couples. This is my passion and what wakes me up early every morning with my mind racing a million miles a minute.    Become a founding member - https://sexology.samcart.com/products/e-course-founding-members     If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

6 Huhti 202140min

Welcome to episode 223 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome A.B. Kelleher to the podcast. In this episode, A.B. Kelleher speaks to me about his book Little Green Pills, how he became interested to write the book, learning to cultivate your imagination for better sex and analyzing why shame stops people from cultivating their sexual fantasies.    A.B. Kelleher is the author of Little Green Pills - It all started in a clinical trial to help women with low libido. But when a black-market version of synthetic testosterone starts spreading like wildfire, the effects don't stop with amped-up love lives.     As a sexual revolution that makes the 1960s look like Victorian England sweeps the US, and social roles radically shift, the government creates the Reproductive Health Administration (RHA) to suppress trafficking in Little Green Pills. As the newest iteration of the "War on Drugs" fails miserably, life for RHA Director Eric Veritan is about to get dangerously interesting.    In this episode, you will hear:     How A.B Kelleher became interested in writing Little Green Pills  The relationship between sex drive and testosterone   How sex can make almost anything more interesting!  Approaching erotica for the first time with Little Green Pills  Learning to cultivate your imagination for better sex  How you can best augment your fantasies   Why some people feel ashamed for what turns them on   Analyzing shame stories and what stops people from cultivating their sexual fantasies   How medical treatments alongside therapy can work great to improve your sex-life    OMGyes   Thank you to our sponsor OMGyes! OMGyes.com is a website devoted to sexual pleasure for people with vulvas and their partners. OMGYES conducts and publishes the first-ever nationally representative large-scale studies about specific pleasure strategies, in partnership with Indiana University and Kinsey Institute researchers.     See for yourself and get a discount at – https://OMGyes.com/sexology      Clinicians, therapists and nurses get free personal access to OMGYES. Just email therapists@omgyes.com from your work email address with a link to your professional profile.    Find A.B Kelleher Online  Little Green Pills on Amazon  Book Giveaway – littlegreenpills@mail.com     Find Dr. Moali online    http://www.sexologypodcast.com    Free Book - 25 Ways to Increase Desire  https://oasis2care.com/opt-in    Find me on social media  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care       If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

30 Maalis 202131min

Welcome to episode 222 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome Bianca Hughes to the podcast. In this episode, Bianca talks to me about the myths and misconceptions around genital herpes, navigating sexuality with religion and learning to make peace with your diagnosis.    Bianca specializes in perfectionism, helping people embrace their imperfections and authentically be themselves. She helps clients work through concerns of self-worth, unhealthy relationships, identity, or feeling overwhelmed. Her approach within therapy is direct but open, meeting clients where they are, providing them freedom to change when they’re ready. She believes in empowering and equipping people with skills, tools, and resources they can utilize for life.     In addition, her passion is to eliminate mental health stigmas, which are prevalent within the black community. As well as eliminating the gap between Christianity and therapy. Bianca is a licensed professional counsellor in Georgia, podcast host, speaker and authenticity coach.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Bianca became interested in working in this area  How Bianca found the courage to tell her story   The myths and misconceptions around genital herpes  Analysing the risks of genital herpes   Ways in which you can share with a potential partner you have genital herpes  Understanding that STI’s are very common  How Bianca navigates her sexuality with her religion   Why women should fully embrace their sexual power  Learning to make pace with your diagnosis   Distinguishing between identity and diagnosis... You are not you’re diagnosis    OMGyes   Thank you to our sponsor OMGyes! OMGyes.com is a website devoted to sexual pleasure for people with vulvas and their partners. OMGYES conducts and publishes the first-ever nationally representative large-scale studies about specific pleasure strategies, in partnership with Indiana University and Kinsey Institute researchers.     See for yourself and get a discount at – https://OMGyes.com/sexology      Clinicians, therapists and nurses get free personal access to OMGYES. Just email therapists@omgyes.com from your work email address with a link to your professional profile.    For Further Listening Confidently Living with Genital Herpes with Bianca Hughes Find Bianca Hughes Online https://www.biancakhughes.com/ https://www.instagram.com/authenticallybeyou   Find Dr. Moali online    http://www.sexologypodcast.com    Find me on social media  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care       If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

23 Maalis 202129min

Welcome to episode 221 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm delighted to welcome back Tara Galeano to the podcast. In this episode, Tara talks to me about her new book; “Rediscovering My Body”, how sex can be a form of healing and looking at the processing that needs to take place to heal sexual dysfunction.    Author Tara Galeano has worked with women for over two decades to get their sexy back. She knows that there is pleasure in the body, beyond our wildest dreams, and every woman can access it. In the "Rediscovering My Body" book, Tara teaches women how to show up for pleasure in their lives. She rediscovered her own body after leaving her twenty-five-year marriage. Realizing that she had given so much of herself away, she knew that she needed to come back to the body's inherent wisdom.     Through reconnecting with her body, Tara was able to understand what was right and pleasurable for her, how best to proceed from this wisdom, and most importantly, how to teach these lessons to other women who are clamoring for the same truths so that they too could transform their lives and reclaim their sensuality. Now Tara has embodied this path and is moving forward to share this with women everywhere!    In this episode, you will hear:     Why Tara decided to write her new book “Rediscovering My Body”  Learning to deal with residual emotions   How sex can be a form of healing   The way in which self-love fosters healing   The barriers that get in the way of women experiencing embodiment   How you can change the conversation you have with your body   Reacquainting with your body   Understanding the need to have patience and give yourself time   Overcoming frustration   Working on open communication with your partner  Acknowledging and working on emotions that can resurface   The processing that needs to take place to heal sexual dysfunction         OMGyes   Thank you to our sponsor OMGyes! OMGyes.com is a website devoted to sexual pleasure for people with vulvas and their partners. OMGYES conducts and publishes the first-ever nationally representative large-scale studies about specific pleasure strategies, in partnership with Indiana University and Kinsey Institute researchers.     See for yourself and get a discount at – https://OMGyes.com/sexology      Clinicians, therapists and nurses get free personal access to OMGYES. Just email therapists@omgyes.com from your work email address with a link to your professional profile.    Find Tara Galeano Online  https://rediscoveringmybody.com     Find Dr. Moali online    http://www.sexologypodcast.com    Find me on social media  https://www.instagram.com/sexologypodcast  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care      Sex Quiz for Women  https://oasis2care.com/sexquiz/     If you are interested in booking a video counselling session with Dr. Moali  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

16 Maalis 202128min