The Daily Stoic17 Huhti 2019

Don’t Worry About Being Respected

In a conversation on “You Made It Weird with Pete Holmes” about Martin Luther King Jr., the screenwriter and director Adam McKay talked about the distinction between two words (and concepts) that we commonly conflate:

Have you noticed the difference between dignity and respect is a big one? People that fly off the handle and get angry too much always talk about, ‘I’m not being respected.’ But respect is something you can’t control, right? Dignity is inside you, dignity is yours.

This is a brilliantly made point, and it aligns perfectly with Stoicism. Remember, to the Stoics the two big categories that everything had to be sorted into were the things that were up to us and the things that are not up to us.

Although it is nice to be respected, that really isn’t something that is up to us. But acting with dignity? Maintaining our own standards—our self-respect? That’s ours. Always. Even when we are under duress, facing adversity, or someone is attempting to humiliate us—dignity remains firmly in our control, provided we don’t give it up.

This is what made Cato such a towering figure to Seneca and Marcus Aurelius and generations of Stoics. He didn’t care what other people thought about him, what they said to him, what they did to him. Sometimes public opinion lined up with his moral compass, sometimes it didn’t, but he never let that sway him from following what really mattered. Even when they showered him with curses or tried to kill him, he stuck fast. As McKay would go on to say in the interview, while we “can’t really control what they’re doing...we can control how we react.” It’s hard to describe Stoicism better than that phrase.

Because that’s what dignity is about. That’s why it’s much more important than “respect.”

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tämä jakso on lisätty Podme-palveluun avoimen RSS-syötteen kautta eikä se ole Podmen omaa tuotantoa. Siksi jakso saattaa sisältää mainontaa.

Jaksot(2982)

No, This Is The Mission | Kindness Is Always The Right Response

You thought you were supposed to be doing this. You thought your job was to do that. But then what happened? Life happened. Stuff happened. Other people happened.📕 Pick up a copy of the 10th Annivers...

12 Touko 8min

It Can Change Everything | A Real-Life Example of How to Build a Coaching Tree

Great leaders don’t just build winning teams, they build people who can go on to lead without them. In today’s episode, Ryan talks about the idea of “growing a coaching tree” and what it means to crea...

11 Touko 25min

We Owe It All To Them | What Marcus Aurelius Learned From His Mother

In honor of Mother’s Day, Ryan talks with Donald Robertson about the powerful influence Marcus Aurelius’ mother had on his life and philosophy. Even though Stoicism is usually talked about as a philos...

10 Touko 13min

Rock Bottom, Recovery, and Starting Over at 40 | Jon Gustin

Jon Gustin got sober at the beginning of 2023, but as he explains in today’s episode, getting sober was not the end of the struggle. It was the beginning of finally facing everything he had spent year...

9 Touko 22min

The Stoic All the Stoics Admired

Cato’s life was his philosophy, and the Stoics never stopped looking to his example. In today’s episode, Ryan explores why Cato the Younger became one of Stoicism’s most admired figures, and what his ...

8 Touko 30min

BONUS | 6 Stoic Rules of Arete (Excellence)

Arete. To the Greeks, it meant excellence. It was the ultimate expression of human greatness—moral, physical, spiritual. It’s what the Stoics were chasing. It’s what you’re chasing today. But how do w...

7 Touko 3min

It Can’t Think About You | How to Be a Better Friend, According to the Stoics

These are impersonal forces. This is fortune and fate. It’s not targeting you. It’s not favoring or picking on you. 🎟️ DAILY STOIC LIVE | Ryan Holiday is coming to a city near you! Grab tickets here ...

7 Touko 15min

You Think You Want Autonomy. You Don’t. | David Epstein

You think you want more freedom, but too much of it can work against you. In this episode, Ryan talks with David Epstein about why constraints can actually make us better. They discuss how deadlines s...

6 Touko 20min