What Makes Love Succeed or Fail? with John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman

This episode is brought to you by Thrive Market, BiOptimizers, BON CHARGE, and Sunlighten. Research has revealed that by staying aware of how we interact with our partners and embracing specific patterns we are less likely to get divorced and more likely to be in a satisfying relationship many years from now. Today on The Doctor’s Farmacy, I’m excited to talk to two leading experts in the field of healthy relationships, Drs. Julie Schwartz Gottman and John Gottman, cofounders of the Gottman Institute. Dr. John Gottman previously served as executive director of the Relationship Research Institute and is a professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington, where he founded the Love Lab. He is world-renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction and has conducted forty years of groundbreaking research with thousands of couples. His work has earned him numerous major awards and he was named one of the top ten most influential therapists of the past quarter century. Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman is president of the Gottman Institute and cofounder of Affective Software, Inc. A highly respected clinical psychologist, she was named Washington State Psychologist of the Year and received the 2021 Psychotherapy Networker Lifetime Achievement Award. This episode is brought to you by Thrive Market, BiOptimizers, BON CHARGE, and Sunlighten. Join Thrive Market today at thrivemarket.com/hyman to receive $80 off your first order. BiOptimizers is offering my community 10% off plus a special gift with purchase. Just head over to magbreakthrough.com/hyman with code hyman10. Right now, my community can go to boncharge.com/HYMAN and use coupon code HYMAN to save 20%. You can save up to $600 on your Sunlighten purchase at sunlighten.com/mark-hyman and mention my name, Dr. Hyman, to save. Here are more details from our interview (audio version / Apple Subscriber version): The top four relationship killers (5:18 / 3:20) The keys to a successful relationship (6:25 / 4:00) Love as a practice (27:09 / 22:50) What makes for a great sex life (31:25 / 27:08) How to have healthy conflict (35:11 / 30:52) Breaking out of reactivity and fight or flight (42:33 / 38:17) The biggest predictor of divorce (48:32 / 44:10) How contempt differs from criticism (50:57 / 46:42) The origins of contempt (53:13 / 48:55) Top relationship hacks (1:00:13 / 54:24) Take the Free Gottman Relationship Quiz and download the Gottman Card Decks app. Get a copy of The Love Prescription: Seven Days to More Intimacy, Connection, and Joy here.