62: Oh, the Jews' Manatees! (The Book of Numbers)
Apocrypals19 Huhti 2020

62: Oh, the Jews' Manatees! (The Book of Numbers)

One thing you have to say for the Book of Numbers, Theophiloi: it is exactly what it says in the title. Well, most of it is, anyway. Mixed in with all the census totals and step-by-step MapQuest directions to the Promised Land, though, is some truly wild stuff, including the return of one of our favorite Biblical tropes, the talking animal that no one seems to think is odd in the slightest. Join us, but make sure to brace yourself for a whole lot of skantent.

Topics of discussion: The Devil's Bible (Wizard Magazine), the Devil's Bible (Codex Gigas), horse_ebooks, "Petition Pit," Scholars and Clowns, the two wolves inside us, clown eggs, James O'Barr's The Crow, a large Jamie Madrox of frog, the P editor, a mysterious animal that is either a sea cow or a Lady Rainicorn, Nazarite vs. Nazarene, the Aaronic Benediction, the Lord's invention of ska, an extremely clutch joke made to my wife, Nachos Galacticos, something that is definitely not an idol, Mt. TERF, God just making a bunch of disembodied mouths and then going to bed, Ac***a Gr**e, some wild nasty idol worship in Peor, Rimmon-Perez, a home for Slayer.

Hymnal: "Let Me Ride That Donkey" by 69 Boyz, "Waterloo" by Stephen Mann of English Martyrs Church (https://www.youtube.com/user/Principal45)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals

Jaksot(126)

69: Thirst Corinthians (The Lives of St. Mary of Egypt and St. Pelagia)

69: Thirst Corinthians (The Lives of St. Mary of Egypt and St. Pelagia)

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68: Scent of a Jesus (The First, Second, and Third Apocryphal Apocalypses of John)

68: Scent of a Jesus (The First, Second, and Third Apocryphal Apocalypses of John)

Welcome to your Not-So-Dirty Thirties, Theophiloi! For as it is written, in the New Jerusalem, we will all be at the age where it's time to start thinking about getting an IRA, and realizing that we c...

12 Heinä 20201h 36min

67: Bad Things to Call Your Mother (The Book of Bartholomew)

67: Bad Things to Call Your Mother (The Book of Bartholomew)

Having a bad day, Theophiloi? I mean, yes, of course you are, we all are in These Unprecedented Times. But hey, let's look on the bright side! At least angels aren't poking out your eyes, cutting out ...

28 Kesä 20201h 27min

66: JeSuS With Two Cool Ses (The Acts of Thomas and his Wonderworking Skin)

66: JeSuS With Two Cool Ses (The Acts of Thomas and his Wonderworking Skin)

Pack your bags, Theophiloi, because we're going on a trip to India with Thomas, the Second Christ, who works hard and flays harder. Thanks to Dr. Tony Burke and his new book, New Testament Apocrypha V...

14 Kesä 20201h 17min

65: Adonai is Ichiban! (The Book of Deuteronomy)

65: Adonai is Ichiban! (The Book of Deuteronomy)

Can you believe we're stuck in this elevator together, Theophiloi? I guess there's nothing we can do but pass the time with the clip show episode of Torah while we wait for the power to come back on. ...

3 Kesä 20201h 51min

64: Spiritual Warfare Is Good, Actually (Bible Adventures and the Wisdom Tree catalogue)

64: Spiritual Warfare Is Good, Actually (Bible Adventures and the Wisdom Tree catalogue)

It's our Nintendo 64th episode, Theophiloi, so we're taking a break from our usual Book study to dive into the least canonical Bible-adjace content we can! Not approved by the church, not approved by ...

18 Touko 20201h 50min

63: Wist Not To Whom Ne Whither (The Lives of St. Roche and St. Guinefort)

63: Wist Not To Whom Ne Whither (The Lives of St. Roche and St. Guinefort)

You know who doesn't come off very well in Bible, Theophiloi? Dogs. This week, though, our canine pals get a little bit of redemption as we dive into the hagiographies of two sterling examples of Son ...

6 Touko 20201h 39min

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