Attending to the Stories Behind Trauma Cycles in Marriage w/Dan & Becky Allender, 8-9 Pairing

Attending to the Stories Behind Trauma Cycles in Marriage w/Dan & Becky Allender, 8-9 Pairing

Giving space for suffering and holding space for one another, as well as working through life and generational trauma in marriage are essential practices for long-term couples. Almost everyone has been through something hard or incapacitating by the time they are married for any number of years. Today Christa is joined by the esteemed Dr. Dan Allender and Becky Allender, co-founders of The Seattle School/The Allender Center, who in their 8-9 pairing have helped hundreds of thousands of people to overcome issues of trauma of all kinds. They share tips in general and reveal some of their own restorative narratives in their marriage, as well as how to suffer alongside each other and address one's own trauma triggers, which are especially helpful when contempt arises. Dan has authored Healing the Wounded Heart, The Cry of the Soul, and more and Becky has authored Hidden in Plain Sight: One Woman's Search for Identity, Intimacy, and Calling. Together they also offer marriage retreat intensives, courses, and more! Watch on YouTube here! The Allender Center specializes in training pastors, therapists, group leaders, lay counselors, and community and business leaders to understand their own stories to more deeply enter the lives of those they are called to love and serve. We come alongside to equip and develop skills for wading into the difficult waters of heartache, trauma, and abuse. Find their resources, books, and marriage retreat info here. https://theallendercenter.org/ Find Dan's podcast here! Use the code ENNEAGRAM15 to get 15% off of one of their marriage video courses here! To work through your relationship needs, make sure to visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Listener Requested Interview Flip: Christa’s Work in Marriage &  Family Systems  w/Hannah Hardin, 4

Listener Requested Interview Flip: Christa’s Work in Marriage & Family Systems w/Hannah Hardin, 4

In this special listener-requested episode, the tables turn! Christa's daughter Hannah (the graphic designer behind Enneagram and Marriage) takes over as host to interview Christa about the questions ...

26 Helmi 41min

How Your Type Processes Conflict (Attachment Series Finale) w/Jeff Cook, 1

How Your Type Processes Conflict (Attachment Series Finale) w/Jeff Cook, 1

In this final episode of the attachment series, Christa sits down with another Enneagram expert, Jeff Cook, Enneagram Type 1, philosopher, former pastor, and co-host of the popular Around the Circle E...

23 Helmi 1h 4min

What Secure Attachment Actually Looks Like (And What To Do to Get It!)

What Secure Attachment Actually Looks Like (And What To Do to Get It!)

In this episode, Christa breaks down one of the most hopeful concepts in attachment theory: earned secure attachment. You are NOT stuck with the attachment style you developed in childhood. Whether yo...

18 Helmi 31min

Don't Settle for Lonely: Relationships Your Soul Needs Now w/Alli Patterson, Type 8

Don't Settle for Lonely: Relationships Your Soul Needs Now w/Alli Patterson, Type 8

In this episode, Christa sits down with Alli Patterson, type 8 (8-1 pairing), teaching Pastor at Crossroads Church, author of Blueprint for Belonging and How to Stay Standing, and founder of the Ignit...

16 Helmi 55min

Valentine's Special: Attachment Styles Meet Enneagram for Every Type ❤️

Valentine's Special: Attachment Styles Meet Enneagram for Every Type ❤️

In this episode, Christa continues the February series on Attachment Styles Meets Enneagram by walking through all nine types and exploring two critical questions: How do you attach well to yourself, ...

11 Helmi 28min

This Little Fire of Mine: Addressing Doubt as You Build a Bolder Faith w/Kendall Mariah, Type 3

This Little Fire of Mine: Addressing Doubt as You Build a Bolder Faith w/Kendall Mariah, Type 3

In this conversation, Christa sits down with Kendall Mariah, author of the brand-new book This Little Fire of Mine: How Flickers of Doubt Can Spark a Bolder, Brighter Faith, to explore what happens wh...

9 Helmi 45min

Attachment: Anxious Meets Avoidant - The Most Common (and Painful) Dance in Marriage

Attachment: Anxious Meets Avoidant - The Most Common (and Painful) Dance in Marriage

In this mini but important episode, Christa tackles the most common, and most painful, dynamic in marriage: the anxious-avoidant pairing. If you've ever felt like you're constantly chasing your spouse...

4 Helmi 17min

Using Your Voice in Marriage: The Cost of Being Too Quiet w/Colette Jane Fehr, Type 7

Using Your Voice in Marriage: The Cost of Being Too Quiet w/Colette Jane Fehr, Type 7

What if the real reason marriages fail isn't a lack of connection but years of staying silent and avoiding conflict? Licensed marriage and family therapist Colette Jane Fehr joins us in an attachment-...

2 Helmi 41min

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