Interpersonal Effectiveness for BPD, Pt. 4: How Strongly Should I Ask or Say No?

In Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), the fourth and final module - known as Interpersonal Effectiveness - teaches you skills to communicate effectively, set boundaries, and maintain relationships while achieving your personal goals.

In this week of TheraHive's course, we'll go over two DBT tools: FAST, and The Dime Game.

FAST is a skill you can use in an interaction where your self-respect should be prioritized. It stands for Fair; Apology-Free; Stick to your values; Truthful.

The Dime Game is a great tool you can refer back to any time, especially with issues where you're unsure who to go to for advice on the situation.

You also don't need to memorize it all. Here's The Dime Game.

In this episode, I’ll go over my reflections on Week 4 of the course, including:

• What kind of things can I used the FAST skill for?
• Am I right to prioritize my self respect sometimes?
• What does it look like to use the FAST skill effectively?
• How do I balance the priorities of both my self respect and my relationships?
• Am I justified in asking for things or saying no?
• Ten things to consider when determining how strongly you should ask or say no
• What does it look like to use The Dime Game to say no to someone?
• What does it mean when we need to put our safety or survival before using the Dime Game?

Thank you to Roland, Alicia, Jesse, and the TheraHive team for having me try out this course!

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TheraHive: DBT Skills Group, Course Info

Need a DBT Skill? DBT Pocket Guide

Blog Post: Dr. Jesse Finkelstein Joins 'Quiet, Not Silent' podcast to Share Insights on DBT

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The Quiet BPD Keep is a recovery-focused community that offers daily affirmations, tarot readings, self-care reminders, DBT skills, books and resources, and more. Age 18+, LGBTQ+ and 420 friendly.

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