7. “My parents keep expecting us to pay for them”

7. “My parents keep expecting us to pay for them”

Barry is a first-generation Pakistani immigrant. His wife, Maria, is also Pakistani and was born and raised in the United States. Cultural expectations are making it difficult to get aligned on their joint finances. Barry has grown up living under a set of unwritten cultural rules whereby the son is expected to take care of his parents financially. They’re paying for family dinners and charity donations right now, but Barry strongly suspects his parents are anticipating moving in with them after they retire. Maria has been biting her lip so far. She wants financial freedom, but knows she cannot change Barry. He must acknowledge – and possibly reprogram – the dialog around money between him and his family. Some of this episode will sound confusing if you’re listening to it from a Western perspective, but these cultural scripts that Barry grew up with are very real. (Imagine if I told you that it “might not make financial sense to purchase a house” – that rattles the Western cultural code many people grew up with, which is why they get so angry when I point it out!). It’s unsettling and uncomfortable to challenge. I know because I’ve been in the same situation as Barry, juggling different expectations from Indian parents. Barry needs to move from “convincing” his parents to fully owning his financial decisions and vocalizing that with love and firm boundaries. Listen to our conversation to hear what that looks like for them and how they plan to compromise between their financial goals and family expectations. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin Produced by Crate Media.

Jaksot(258)

49. “Our housing expense unexpectedly went up $2K when we bought our first home” (Part 1)

49. “Our housing expense unexpectedly went up $2K when we bought our first home” (Part 1)

Elena and Eric are both 25. They live in Toronto, and they make $160k as a household. They love going to EDM festivals and spend thousands of dollars every year traveling to them—it’s their Rich Life!...

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48. “My husband needs a better job, but he hates the idea of earning more”

48. “My husband needs a better job, but he hates the idea of earning more”

Kara and Sean make $150k annually, with $100k of that coming from Kara’s salary in healthcare. They have a baby daughter, and Kara would like to take a step back in her career in order to spend more t...

21 Kesä 20221h 13min

47. “We make $500k. Why are we carrying a balance on our credit cards?”

47. “We make $500k. Why are we carrying a balance on our credit cards?”

Ashley and Charles are in their early forties and have been married for six years. Together, they have five children from previous relationships. They live in a high-cost-of-living area—but, collectiv...

14 Kesä 20221h 27min

46. “The ghost of FIRE still haunts our money mindset—we can’t enjoy money”

46. “The ghost of FIRE still haunts our money mindset—we can’t enjoy money”

Carolyn and Gavin have been married for ten years. They have three small children and bring in about $130k annually—with a healthy $500k in investments. So what’s the problem? Once we look closer, spe...

7 Kesä 202254min

45. “She tells me that it’s my fault we can’t live the life we want to live”

45. “She tells me that it’s my fault we can’t live the life we want to live”

Sarah earns more than Andrew. They’re unmarried but imagine a future together, or would like to. The problem is that Andrew’s existing money scripts (and $65k in debt) have him frozen—unable to spend ...

31 Touko 20221h 11min

44. “Trust in the universe and it (or my partner) will provide”

44. “Trust in the universe and it (or my partner) will provide”

Today’s couple is actually on the same page when it comes to their Rich Life, but they’re not making much progress toward it. Alex brings in $70k from a full time job. Charlotte runs their joint busin...

24 Touko 20221h 2min

43. “Our $300k income is variable and declining but we aren’t adjusting our lifestyle”

43. “Our $300k income is variable and declining but we aren’t adjusting our lifestyle”

How do you manage your finances when your monthly pay is inconsistent? Vince makes around $300k a year in the mortgage industry, while Kasey focuses on raising their kids at home. Despite that rather ...

17 Touko 20221h 10min

42. “We’re worth $5.7 million but we’re arguing over the price of chocolates for Valentine’s day”

42. “We’re worth $5.7 million but we’re arguing over the price of chocolates for Valentine’s day”

Making a lot of money is surprisingly easy. But if you’ve lived with too little of it most of your life, getting over the fear of spending it can be another story completely. Nicole and Michael have a...

10 Touko 20221h 15min

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