230: What if you discovered you were the enemy?

230: What if you discovered you were the enemy?

“It’s just terror, it’s just fear with no object…It’s so purely guttural and instinctive it’s almost like the prey of a tiger…the moment that it knows it’s about to be ripped apart.”


Today's episode featured Neil Woods. You can find out more about Neil by going to neilwoods.net, where you can also find links to his two books: Good Cop, Bad War and Drug Wars, with more about his own experience and about the War on Drugs in Britain. To find out more about his organization, LEAP, or Law Enforcement Action Partnership, go to lawenforcementactionpartnership.org.

Producers: Whit Missildine, Andrew Waits

Episode Summary: Growing up with a sense of heroic duty, a man becomes a cop fighting the drug war, when the sobering realities of his job lead him to profound awakening.

Social Media:

Instagram: @actuallyhappening

This Is Actually Happening Discussion Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/201783687561039/

Website: www.thisisactuallyhappening.com

Website for Andrew Waits: andrdewwaits.com


Content/Trigger Warnings: near death, violence, suicide, mention of sexual assault, mention of gang rape, domestic violence, explicit language

Wondery Plus: All episodes of the show prior to episode #130 are now part of the Wondery Plus premium service. To access the full catalog of episodes, and get all episodes ad free, sign up for Wondery Plus at https://wondery.com/plus

Support the Show: Support The Show on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/happening

Shop at the Store: The This Is Actually Happening online store is now officially open. Follow this link: https://www.thisisactuallyhappening.com/shop to access branded t-shirts, posters, stickers and more from the shop.

Intro Music: "Illabye" – Tipper

Music Bed: Ambient Themes by Nigel Coutinho

Services

If you or someone you know is struggling with the effects of trauma or mental illness, please refer to the following resources.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

National Alliance on Mental Illness: 1-800-950-6264

National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

Crisis Text Line: Within the US, text HOME to 741741

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jaksot(320)

151: What if he made you think you were crazy?

151: What if he made you think you were crazy?

“I was sure that this was his mental illness and not something wrong with me until I started hearing it in my head. And that was when I started to think, 'maybe I’m actually going crazy'.”Producers: S...

24 Maalis 202048min

150: What if you were trapped in a cycle of abuse?

150: What if you were trapped in a cycle of abuse?

“My earliest memories as a child were fear and anxiety…I was never able to control the situation and that unknown just haunted me.”Producer/Editor: Whit MissildineEpisode Summary: A girl straddles man...

10 Maalis 202052min

149: What if you committed child sexual abuse?

149: What if you committed child sexual abuse?

“I misused my position of power to get my needs met…How is it that if we’re called by God to this ministry we could possibly do such a destructive thing?”Producers/Editors: Nigel Coutinho, Stephanie L...

25 Helmi 20201h 5min

148: What if you killed someone?

148: What if you killed someone?

“We have so much less control than we think we do….Death is really close at hand and we do not do ourselves often any favors by forgetting that.”Producer: Whit MissildineEpisode Summary: Firmly establ...

11 Helmi 202059min

147: What if your best friend was dying?

147: What if your best friend was dying?

“It’s much better to try to move forward with your life and accept that things are nebulous, and there are no clear answers.”Producer: Whit MissildineEditors: Sara Marinelli, Whit MissildineEpisode Su...

28 Tammi 202048min

146: What if you thought your mother was a robot?

146: What if you thought your mother was a robot?

“I completely lost touch with reality. You can’t rely on those around you, and you can’t rely on what’s within you. That’s the most terrifying thing in the world.”Producer: Whit MissildineEpisode Summ...

14 Tammi 202046min

145: What if your best friend met a tragic fate?

145: What if your best friend met a tragic fate?

“I’m the kind of person where I like to know answers. I don’t like secrets I don’t like surprises…I really want to know what brought him to that. I really want to know why.” Producer: Whit MissildineE...

17 Joulu 201941min

144: What if you suffered from postpartum depression?

144: What if you suffered from postpartum depression?

“All those thoughts were going through my head like you’re worthless, you’re a loser, you’re a failure, you can’t be happy, you can’t feel love…just this feeling of profound failure.” Producer: Whit M...

3 Joulu 201951min

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