Six Different Ways to Say NO

Hear it Here - adbl.co/3To6NDu00:01:27 In 2019, Matthew Berry and Steven Brown did research on the vocal tones 00:06:14 Jo Emerson is a confidence coach 00:07:10 Watch Your Body Language 00:08:33 Maintain Comfortable Eye Contact 00:09:26 Dress the Part 00:10:38 Develop Your Personal Sense of Poise • Assertiveness is something you can fake till you make! Be mindful of your body language (stand tall and take up space), maintain comfortable eye contact, fine-tune your personal sense of style (whatever that is), and practice the habits of a poised, composed person (such as gracefully accepting compliments).#EyeContact #GenuineConfidence #JoEmerson #MatthewBerry #KarenPine #StevenBrown #BeingAssertive—OrAtLeastHowToFakeItTillYouMakeIt #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #StandUpForYourselfPhoto by Vlada-Karpovich and Pexels

28 Helmi 202313min

Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3shIydQ00:03:35 Psychologist Dr. Ann Vertel uses reflective listening in her practice00:04:35 How to Master Reflective Listening 00:13:48 Psychologizing—A Peculiar Kind of Invalidation • When we listen empathically and reflect, we go quiet and still within ourselves so we can receive as accurate a picture of the other person’s account as possible. We use mirroring and paraphrasing without questioning, leading, or starting a new thread. • We can reflect either content, feeling, or meaning, but should always remain non-directional and non-judgmental.#Empathic #EmpathicListeners #Invalidation #Jung #DrAnnVertel #Psychologizing #Reflecting #BeStillAndReflect #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #TrainYourEmpathyPhoto courtesy of George Becker and Pexels.

21 Helmi 202320min

Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/3GAwNag00:03:29 “But I thought you meant X!”00:07:00 Preconceived Attitudes.00:12:34 Judgment and Premature Evaluation.00:15:11 Other Bad Communication Habits to Avoid.00:17:12 Constantly Interrupting.00:19:10 Using Qualifiers.00:20:22 Equating Your Experiences.00:20:27 “I know exactly how you feel!"00:22:24 Waiting Instead of Listening.00:23:14 Fluff and Filler Words.Barriers to good conversation include assumptions, strong negative emotions like anger and aggression (which inspire defensiveness), preconceived ideas and prejudice, fear, inflexibility and a need to control, premature evaluation and judgment, and other negative conversational habits like interrupting or one-upping. #AmazingCommunicationSkills #BadCommunicationHabits #BadConversationalist #BadHabit #CommonHabitualConversationalTraps #Communication #CommunicationBreakdown #CommunicationHabits #CommunicationSkills #ConversationalNarcissism #ConversationFlow #DistortCommunication #EffectiveCommunication #FillerWords #Floundering #Fluff #GoodCommunicator #HumanInteraction #ManipulativeCommunicationStyle #PrematureEvaluation #PsychologicalBarrier #PsychologicalBarriersToCommunication #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoachingPhoto courest of PICHA and Pexels

14 Helmi 202326min

Hear it Here - https://www.audible.com/pd/B094NZS81Q/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWU-BK-ACX0-258377&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_258377_pd_usAsking questions is an active way to deliberately elicit information from a person, but they need to be targeted and not too obvious. A few seemingly casual hypothetical questions can reveal a person’s deeper values, perspectives, and goals, for example asking what their favorite movie is, what they would save from a fire, or what animal they see themselves as.#Answer #Answering #DustinWood #Questions #Rorschach #AskedAndAnalyzed #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoachingPhoto Courtesy of Leeloo-Thefirst and Pexels

7 Helmi 202323min

Hear it Here - adbl.co/3To6NDu• Everyone has a right to have boundaries. Try to reframe how you think of boundaries—they are there to protect and prioritize what’s important, and not shut someone out or offend them. Trust your own feelings and judgments instead of avoiding them.• State your boundary and don’t overexplain or ask permission. Then, if a boundary is violated, follow up with appropriate action. A big part of healthy boundaries is respecting other people’s boundaries, too.Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#Acquiescing #Assert #Boundary #Boundarysetting #Communicate #Peoplepleasers #Peoplepleasing #EveryoneNeedsBoundaries...IncludingYou! #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching

31 Tammi 202317min

• The best mindset to adopt in order to become a better communicator is the one that will best allow you to connect, meet your needs, solve problems, and express yourself. • Begin by asking yourself what your default communication style is: aggressive, passive-aggressive, or manipulative. None of these styles actually achieves the ultimate goal of communication, however. • The way you communicate is a choice. Assertive communication is the ability to express needs, wants, thoughts, and feelings directly without disrespecting or controlling others. Mature conversationalists are self-controlled, balanced, relaxed, open, and respectful.• Communicating well is simple and easy, but we need to remove the formidable psychological barriers that stand in the way. With awareness, we can remove them and improve our communication skills.#AggressiveCommunicator #Assertive #AssertiveCommunicator #Communication #CommunicationStyle #Communicator #Manipulation #Manipulative #ManipulativeCommunicator #Nonverbally #Passive #Passiveaggressive #PassiveAggressiveCommunicator #PassiveCommunicator #TheBasicsAreNotSoBasic #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching

24 Tammi 202320min

• Body language signals cannot be interpreted in isolation. Rather, first seek a baseline of behavior to help interpret a particular new observation – a baseline helps you identify incongruent behavior and spot a deception. • Look for mirroring, pay attention to overall energy, and remember that body language is dynamic, so you need to gather as much data as possible. Then consider this data in context of history and the current environment. • The voice is a part of the human body and speed, timbre, volume, pitch, and degree of control can signify emotional state. The body is a whole, with verbal and nonverbal mingling together. • Reading “message clusters” helps us organize isolated observations, and note whether they are aggressive, romantic, assertive, deceptive ad so on, in aggregate. #Aggression #Assertive #Clusters #Context #Deceit #Deceptive #DondersInstitute #HumanBody #Nonverbal #PaulEkman #PNAS #Pouw #Submissive #TheHumanBodyIsAWhole—ReadItThatWay #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching

17 Tammi 202329min

• Use mirroring, paraphrasing, or reflecting to show active listening. • Body language can be empathic too, and when your body mirrors another person’s, this is a way to show physical “active listening” of the body.• To show that your body is listening, face the person, make comfortable eye contact, and seek to concur with “yeses” or head nods. Then mirror their words, voice, posture, or other idiosyncrasies. • When mirroring, be mindful of the gender or cultural context, and only reflect what is positive. Avoid mirroring strong negative emotions (panic, anger, depression) and instead model a sense of calm by slowing down and taking a deep breath; the other person may then mirror you. Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#DrKerstinUväsMoberg #Empathy #Gueguen #Heres #Listening #VanBaaren #TheBodyCanListen #Too #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #Mirroring #Paraphrasing #ActiveListening

11 Tammi 202317min