The neuroscience of control: Helping kids cope with stress and become self-driven with Dr. William Stixrud
Securely Attached24 Kesä 2025

The neuroscience of control: Helping kids cope with stress and become self-driven with Dr. William Stixrud

Clinical neuropsychologist and co-author of The Self-Driven Child, Dr. William Stixrud joins me for a powerful conversation about how we can raise confident, resilient kids by helping them feel a greater sense of control, without giving up our role as parents.

Together we explore:

  • Why a low sense of control is one of the most stressful experiences a child (or adult) can have, and how we can support our kids in feeling more agentful in their lives.

  • How secure attachment and autonomy are deeply connected—and why attachment must come first.

  • What SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) is and how parents can use techniques from this modality whether your child has anxiety or not.

  • Why Dr. Stixrud started saying "I love you too much to fight with you about homework" and how you can use this too to defuse power struggles and build internal motivation.

  • Tips for how parents can more successfully respond to children's behaviors that they can't control, like tantrums, hitting, or screaming.

  • Why stepping in too often can interrupt neurological processes that help kids learn, adapt, and build resilience.

  • How to support self-driven learning, encourage safe risk-taking, and build a foundation of mutual respect in your family.

If you're looking to reduce conflict and build more trust in your parent-child relationship, this conversation is filled with evidence-based insight and practical tools you won't want to miss!

LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:

👉🏻 https://stixrud.com/

ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

📚 The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives

📚 What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home

📚 The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook

🎧 The Self-Driven Child Podcast

👉🏻 Learned Helplessness at Fifty: Insights from Neuroscience

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 72. Supportive parenting for anxious childhood emotions space how a new treatment for childhood anxiety and OCD is revolutionizing care with Dr. Eli Lebowitz

🎧 244. Understanding parental dysregulation: How to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton

🎧 146. The hidden dangers of an achievement centric approach with Jennifer Breheny Wallace

🎧 206. Picky eating, ARFID, and SPACE: How a new anxiety treatment can help your child be more flexible around food with Dr. Yaara Shimshoni

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