One and Done: Raising an Only Child, Not a Lonely Child14 Loka 2020

9. Accepting our family size and letting go of a fantasy

"When single child families idealize what they don't have: how the fantasy of larger families can poison our happiness and development" by Lauren Sandler arrived right on time for Jamie, who was struggling with intrusive thoughts about the second child that isn't here. This episode is the journey to get closer to being more fully present with the child who is here, moving from the "bargaining" stage of grief into a genuine and deeper acceptance of the reality and the gifts of being a single child family. Links and show notes with time stamps are below.

Link to the article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/one-and-only/201302/when-single-child-families-idealize-what-they-dont-have?amp

Send us a voicemail about being/having an only child! https://anchor.fm/oneanddone/message

E-mail us your thoughts at PopernackPodcasts@gmail.com.

You're welcome to join the Facebook group One and Done: Raising an Only Child, Not a Lonely Child.

Until [5:10] or is is about the future direction of the show and an invitation to get involved/give feedback. We're also looking especially for folks who are one and done by choice and/or very content with their family size. Basically as many different voices and experiences as possible would be great/help all of us get perspective. [5:10:30] Jamie realizes she's actually been in the "bargaining" stage of grief and will share the recent insights that helped her move more toward acceptance. [7:40] story of being at the beach this weekend, missing phantom children and wanting to be present and enjoy the child we have. Acknowledging that those feelings are real but wanting to be in reality in the moment. [10:10] moving into a discussion of Lauren Sandler (only child with an only child) and her article which helped Jamie so much, giving permission to let go of the fantasy. We do this on our own time table and the process is different for everyone. [14:40] How being an only child can be a good and helpful thing to one's development, from lived experience.

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Jaksot(12)

12. Raising an independent only child /reviews of books about only children/ announcement

Reviewing the most popular books about only children, advice on how to help your kid become independent, and an announcement about the show. Until 2:50 is the announcement, 2:50 on is book reviews, wi...

31 Loka 202031min

11. Mental health, faith, and having an only child (cont'd from episode 10)

"There are no small things." We continue with information and reframes around mental health, executive dysfunction, and faith, as it pertains to parenting one child. The first part is about depression...

22 Loka 202029min

10. When it's hard: self-compassion and perspective for parenting an only child in an isolated world

Some reframes to help us parents of onlys have more self-compassion and perspective on this awesome endeavor we're undertaking. And since it's episode 10, we are celebrating by giving away 10 copies o...

21 Loka 202016min

8. Raising an Only Child with a Partner: 3 Ways to Stay Connected

Our onlys are our focus; sometimes we forget significant others. Kathy shares 3 ways to stay connected to our partners and the movie that helped her marriage through a rough spot. We value our single ...

9 Loka 202010min

7. Big age gap? Try this hack.

When your kid has much older or younger siblings, including potentially half and step siblings, how can you help create the conditions for a positive relationship? Jamie shares personal feelings and e...

30 Syys 202013min

6. Struggles and Comebacks

In this vulnerable, funny, & practical episode, Kathy shares some relatable true stories about people’s reactions to her having one child. She offers thoughts on how to deal with uncomfortable convers...

23 Syys 202013min

5. 7 Keys to Parenting an Only Child

[3:10] 1. Chill out. [5:15] 2. Take care of ourselves. [6:15] Geeking out about active listening. [7:53] 3. Active listening. [14:09] 4. Family traditions and norms. [18:20] 5. Community. [20:12] 6. R...

17 Syys 202027min