The Science Behind Your Need to Please

The Science Behind Your Need to Please

If you've ever been called a "people pleaser" or found yourself constantly putting others' needs before your own, what you're experiencing may actually be a trauma response called fawning. In the new book Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back, clinical psychologist Dr. Ingrid Clayton explains this often overlooked alternative to fight-flight-freeze, an effort to appease threats by trying to make oneself more appealing. Whether in relationships, work, or family dynamics, understanding this pattern can help you reclaim your voice and authentic self. 📱 Follow The Next Big Idea Daily on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen 📩 Want more bite-sized insights from the best new nonfiction delivered straight to your inbox? Sign up for our Book of the Day newsletter

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S23 E4: The Security Trap (Ben Ansell)

S23 E4: The Security Trap (Ben Ansell)

Today, Ben explains why democracy and security are such uneasy bedfellows. • Ben Ansell is professor of comparative democratic institutions at Oxford and author of “Why Politics Fail” • Want to go beh...

6 Heinä 202313min

S23 E3: The Solidarity Trap (Ben Ansell)

S23 E3: The Solidarity Trap (Ben Ansell)

Why is it so hard to create a sense of national unity and civic responsibility here in the Divided States of America? • Ben Ansell is professor of comparative democratic institutions at Oxford and aut...

5 Heinä 202315min

S23 E2: The Equality Trap (Ben Ansell)

S23 E2: The Equality Trap (Ben Ansell)

Why has the American political system failed to arrest accelerating inequality, and is there anything we can do about it? • Ben Ansell is professor of comparative democratic institutions at Oxford and...

4 Heinä 202316min

S23 E1: The Democracy Trap (Ben Ansell)

S23 E1: The Democracy Trap (Ben Ansell)

As you may have noticed, modern democracies aren’t doing so hot. In country after country, income inequality soars while solidarity plummets. Resentment simmers while national unity cools. In places l...

3 Heinä 202317min

S22 E5: Take the Scenic Route and Give Yourself Grace at the Finish Line (Shelby Stanger)

S22 E5: Take the Scenic Route and Give Yourself Grace at the Finish Line (Shelby Stanger)

In her final mini masterclass, Shelby warns you not to be so focused on reaching the finish line that you may miss the epic views along the way. • Shelby Stanger is the host of REI’s “Wild Ideas Worth...

30 Kesä 202312min

S22 E4: Use Humor to Deflate Fear (Shelby Stanger)

S22 E4: Use Humor to Deflate Fear (Shelby Stanger)

When scaling a steep rock wall or surfing gnarly waves, it’s easy to let fear get the better of you, but today, Shelby explains how you can use humor to stay loose. • Shelby Stanger is the host of REI...

29 Kesä 202311min

S22 E3: Map Your Trail, but Start as Soon as You Can (Shelby Stanger)

S22 E3: Map Your Trail, but Start as Soon as You Can (Shelby Stanger)

Before you embark on a wild adventure, you obviously need to do some planning. But don’t go overboard. Give yourself a deadline, and get to work. • Shelby Stanger is the host of REI’s “Wild Ideas Wort...

28 Kesä 20239min

S22 E2: Have a Strong Why (Shelby Stanger)

S22 E2: Have a Strong Why (Shelby Stanger)

If you have a strong why for pursuing a wild adventure, you’re more likely to find a way to get it done. • Shelby Stanger is the host of REI’s “Wild Ideas Worth Living” podcast and the author of “Will...

27 Kesä 202314min

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