The Hard Questions That Might Save Your Relationship | Susan Piver

The Hard Questions That Might Save Your Relationship | Susan Piver

Today we have some counterintuitive relationship advice. If you're in a tough spot with your loved one, why would you want to have a deep chat about religion, politics, work, or your eating habits? Wouldn't that just make everything worse? My guest today says asking these hard questions is exactly what you should do. Susan Piver is a fan favorite in TPH-world. She has been a practicing Buddhist for more than a quarter-century. She's a graduate of a Buddhist seminary, founder of The Open Heart Project, and a New York Times bestselling author of many books, including How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life. This month, she's releasing a revised and expanded edition of her blockbuster book, The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask Before You Say "I Do." This book started out as a relationship tool for recently engaged couples, but it's taken on a much broader life. You can use it if your long-term relationship has hit a snag, if you've recently broken up with someone and want to understand why, or if you're single and just want to know yourself better. The book originally came out 20 years ago, but a lot has changed since then, so Susan has gone through and done a big rewrite. In this conversation, we talk about: why hard questions are so key to building or rebuilding the foundation for a healthy relationship; the difference between love affairs and long-term relationships (and how failing to see the difference can tank your relationship); why breakups are rarely caused by lack of love, but instead by something else; and Susan will explore, from a Buddhist perspective, what happens when the boundaries between you and another person begin to dissolve – and what to watch out for when this happens. Also, there's (just barely!) still time to join us in our free Taming Anxiety Challenge. This ten-day meditation challenge will teach you how to understand your anxiety and give you practical tools for coping with the difficult thoughts and emotions that arise when you are anxious. And it's also a great way to kickstart your meditation practice. You can join the Taming Anxiety Challenge by downloading the Ten Percent Happier app: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install. You should be prompted to join the Challenge after registering your account. If you've already downloaded the app, just open it up or visit this link to join: https://10percenthappier.app.link/TamingAnxietyChallenge. Be sure to sign up by June 24! Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/susan-piver-359

Jaksot(970)

Roshi Joan Halifax, 'Turning Towards the Suffering'

Roshi Joan Halifax, 'Turning Towards the Suffering'

Roshi Joan Halifax came to New York City by way of New Orleans in the '60s with a thirst to engage in social justice, protesting "everything related to discrimination," she said, and the Vietnam War. Halifax, whose latest book is called "Standing at the Edge: Finding Freedom Where Fear and Courage Meet," went on to become a Buddhist teacher, Zen priest, anthropologist and a pioneer in the field of end-of-life care who has brought her work into psychiatric programs, penitentiaries and refugee camps.

30 Touko 20181h 7min

Sally Kohn, 'We Need to Fix Hate'

Sally Kohn, 'We Need to Fix Hate'

It was around the time she decided to go on her second meditation retreat that Sally Kohn, a gay, Jewish, community organizer turned political commentator, took a job as a commentator for Fox News. In her TV career -- she's now a commentator for CNN -- Kohn has experienced hateful personal attacks from online trolls and recently faced some backlash over her first book, "The Opposite of Hate: A Field Guide To Repairing Our Humanity," but with her book she has lead a conversation around finding compassion for those who trumpet hate.

23 Touko 20181h 15min

Paul Gilmartin, The Battles in Our Heads, Uncensored

Paul Gilmartin, The Battles in Our Heads, Uncensored

Comedian Paul Gilmartin was the host of TV's "Dinner and a Movie" for 16 years, but smiling and acting happy on-screen often "felt like lifting 500 pounds," he said, as he struggled behind the scenes with depression and even contemplated suicide. When the show ended, Gilmartin launched "The Mental Illness Happy Hour" podcast, which he said has been a valuable outlet that allowed him to work through his claims of being sexually abused by his mother and helping others with their own personal struggles.

16 Touko 201858min

Thupten Jinpa, The Importance of Compassion - LIVE!

Thupten Jinpa, The Importance of Compassion - LIVE!

Dan Harris leads a conversation with Thupten Jinpa, the Dalai Lama's longtime English-language translator and a monk for over 25 years, about the uses for compassion meditation in today's culture in front of a live audience at the Asia Society in New York City. Their conversation was recorded on Feb. 15, 2018, one day after 17 people were killed when a gunman opened fire at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida.

9 Touko 20181h 27min

Catherine Price, Redefining Your Relationship with Your Phone

Catherine Price, Redefining Your Relationship with Your Phone

It was an "out of body moment," Catherine Price said, when she realized her newborn daughter had been looking up at her but she had been looking down on her phone, scrolling through antique door knobs on eBay. It led the "How To Break Up With Your Phone" author to redefine her connection to her device and she now offers her advice on how we can go from an "obsessive relationship" to a "friends with benefits" situation with our phones that's still enjoyable but establishes boundaries.

2 Touko 201855min

George Haas, Regulating the 'Fear Mind'

George Haas, Regulating the 'Fear Mind'

George Haas has worked as a filmmaker, an artist, a doorman at "every major nightclub in New York City" in the '80s, and now he's a meditation teacher in Los Angeles, but even his meditation journey has many turns. "What can I tell you, I'm a seeker," Haas said, as he described how a regular practice helped ease the psychological trauma of a "crappy childhood," got him sober and now he guides others through his attachment theory-based healing practices.

25 Huhti 201847min

Ezra Klein, How We Interact with Politics Matters

Ezra Klein, How We Interact with Politics Matters

Vox's editor-at-large and journalist Ezra Klein, formerly of The Washington Post, has made a name for himself as a political commentator, finding context within the chaos of our political scene and exploring the idea of what a political system would look like if created amidst tribalism. Klein, who hosts the popular podcast, "The Ezra Klein Show," also argues in our interview that it's important to take a step back from social media - Twitter, Facebook, SnapChat and others - and be mindful enough to ask if these things we are obsessed with checking are good for us.

18 Huhti 20181h 24min

Janice Marturano, How to Be a Better Boss

Janice Marturano, How to Be a Better Boss

Janice Marturano was a vice president at General Mills working on the Pillsbury merger deal in 2000 when she lost both her parents, and began a regular meditation practice as a way to soothe stress at work and in her personal life. Noticing the relief a daily practice brought her, and wanting to lead by example, she sought out a way to introduce mindfulness to her coworkers, and by the time she left General Mills to start the Institute for Mindful Leadership, she said more than 700 employees had completed mindfulness leadership training.

11 Huhti 20181h 14min

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