182. Sparks vs Chemistry: How To Build Chemistry & Stop Chasing Instant Attraction (throwback)

182. Sparks vs Chemistry: How To Build Chemistry & Stop Chasing Instant Attraction (throwback)

In this throwback episode, I’m breaking down the difference between sparks, chemistry, and compatibility and why chasing the spark can actually hurt your dating life. We’ll talk about what the spark really is (spoiler: it’s brain chemicals), why it fades fast, and what matters more for a long-term relationship. I share the three biggest myths about sparks, plus tips for building real chemistry and knowing when to keep dating someone, even if you're not feeling butterflies out of the gate. This episode originally aired on 2/13/2024.


MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

* How to Not Die Alone by Logan Ury

* Ep. 27 – How To Tell If Someone Is A Good Match

* My course: How to Identify Your Needs


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DATING COURSES

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Jaksot(263)

241. Dating With Different Cultural Backgrounds w/ Marina Iakovleva

241. Dating With Different Cultural Backgrounds w/ Marina Iakovleva

I'm chatting with Marina Iakovleva, creator of Dating Beyond Borders, who's spent 12 years exploring how people date around the world. We're discussing everything from why Scandinavians have sex befor...

27 Helmi 53min

240. Stop Confusing Connection for Compatibility (Dating Dilemmas)

240. Stop Confusing Connection for Compatibility (Dating Dilemmas)

What happens when you have an amazing connection, but the relationship itself is kind of a bust? In this episode, I'm answering four dating dilemmas that all highlight the common dating mistake of con...

24 Helmi 35min

239. Singles Events, Setups & Lessons From Vetting 800 Men w/ Alli Goldberg

239. Singles Events, Setups & Lessons From Vetting 800 Men w/ Alli Goldberg

Alli Goldberg (back for round 2!) is the creator and host of Love Isn't Blind, the live dating show where the men can't speak, and she's now hosted nearly 100 shows across 10 cities. That means she's ...

20 Helmi 49min

238. When to Say "I Love You" (And Should You Say It First?)

238. When to Say "I Love You" (And Should You Say It First?)

I'm sharing my experiences with saying "I love you" for the first time, from awkwardly blurting it out in a noisy subway station to intentionally saying it over the phone. I'm covering the signs you'r...

17 Helmi 26min

237. Surviving the Worst Parts of Dating w/ Rory Uphold

237. Surviving the Worst Parts of Dating w/ Rory Uphold

I'm chatting with Rory Uphold, a writer and the author of The Final Girl's Guide to the Horrors of Dating, a book that uses the horror movie framework to help people navigate modern dating. We're disc...

13 Helmi 57min

236. When to Move In (And What No One Tells You About Living Together)

236. When to Move In (And What No One Tells You About Living Together)

You know you want to be with your partner for a long time, but how do you know when to move in? Today I'm sharing everything I've learned about moving in with a partner, from knowing when you're ready...

10 Helmi 34min

235. Dating Red Flags That Predict Domestic Inequity w/ Laura Danger

235. Dating Red Flags That Predict Domestic Inequity w/ Laura Danger

Author and educator Laura Danger (@thatdarnchat) brought weaponized incompetence and the nag paradox into the mainstream, and today she's here to talk about how these dynamics can show up way before y...

6 Helmi 53min

234. "His Best Friend Is A Woman. Is That A Red Flag?"

234. "His Best Friend Is A Woman. Is That A Red Flag?"

Feeling uneasy about your partner's friendship with someone of the opposite sex? You're not alone. In this episode, I'm breaking down what that jealousy actually means, when it's a you problem vs. a r...

3 Helmi 24min

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