Tortured By Your Kids w/ Tom Papa | Your Mom's House Ep.690

HIGH AND TIGHT!! On this week's episode of Your Mom's House, Tom Segura and Christina P discuss cologne, stinky foods, alpha vs. beta males, and more! They take a look at another "special girl," a dude that wants to show Donald Trump a good time, another video from the gag couple, a cool guy dating coach, and a round of Christina's TikTok curations. Also, a Mommy used Joe's "Good Morning Julia" lines to score a date on Tinder, and a new YMH staffer challenges Chad for his title of "Smartest Person at Studio Jeans." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

27 Apr 20221h 32min

JEANS UP!! On this week’s episode of YMH, Tom Segura and Christina P discuss the stupidest holiday: 4/20, as well as amusement park fatalities, Gwyneth Paltrow’s and other celebrity diets, and Biden’s newly appointed government official who is also a pup play enthusiast. Also, there’s a new jukebox in Studio Jeans and Tom’s not happy about how it’s being used. They watch videos of a Cool Guy who is “not Jewish,” and update from Unk Shine, a dude defending the R word, and some “Horrible or Hilarious” clips.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

20 Apr 20221h 34min

It's another week in the Mommy Dome and Tom Segura and Christina P open on a cool lady who doesn't like dogs and Tom tries to guess what Christina's secret kink is! Can you guess what it is? We discuss gross dads with nasty habits at restaurants, we laugh at some Horrible or Hilarious, and we have our second round of the Smart Off of Chris VS Chad! Christina pitches a Would You Rather and we take a look at Christina's TikTok curations for the week! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

13 Apr 20221h 35min

Main Mommies Tom Segura and Christina P are hungover from a night of hardcore drinking! Any nurses looking to get into a relationship with a cool guy? We discuss the need for a perfect smile, pigs from Tunisia, and how models these days are getting grosser. We talk about Burnt Crystals, take a look at a wile video instead of text from a cool guy, and we see what Kevin Samuels is up to.  Then Chris Distefano enters the mommy dome and can't believe how good everyone looks! Check out his YouTube and/or Netflix special for something the day this drops! Chirssy Specials drops some news on a brand new standup special he's releasing, we get an update on Titi Jerry and Chris's dad, and we discuss the best homeless populations. Then, Tim runs Chrissy Hypotheticals and Christina through his four levels of hell. What are your answers? Then, we run Chris through all the heavy segments he's missed! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Apr 20221h 57min

Welcome back to the Mommydome with Tom Segura and Christina P, where there's a Margaritaville inside! Christina visited Tom on the road with the kids and she's surprised how BORING he is on the road. We have an opening clip that really upsets Christina, Enny reclaims his hot sauce power, and we discuss peener problems. We read some follow up emails from mommies about the Texan in Russia, Victoria's Secret models, the guy opening car doors of unlocked cars, and the famous old drunk from Killarney. Christina comes up with a difficult Margaritaville-based Would You Rather, there's an incredible update on the Chad VS Chris feud, and we watch Christina's latest curation of TikToks! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

30 Mar 20221h 34min

The third leg of Tom's I'm Coming Everywhere tour is here! Get tickets at https://tomsegura.com/tour and use code TOMMY to access the pre-sale starting Wednesday, at 10am local Are your jeans pulled over your head? Tom Segura and Christina P open the show on a really special girl who isn't like other girls! Christina reveals she has a new kink that she is unwilling to reveal, we talk about Tommy Lasorda's SlimFast commercials and commencement speech for Tom's confirmation, and we discuss Netflix's "Inventing Anna." There's a #YMHexclusive about real bidets, Horrible or Hilarious gets kicked up a notch, and we discuss completely insane amusement parks with dangerous rides. We welcome baby Zollo to Austin, which means the entire crew is now in Texas! And we finish off with taking a look at Christina's most recent TikTok curations! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

23 Mar 20221h 27min

IS HE DOWN?!?! Tom Segura knows he said "okay" to Charo, but that doesn't mean he accepted the bet, and Hot Ones's Sean Evans agrees with Enny: Hot sauce is the best! Tom and Tina weigh in on the Russia-Ukraine war, and watch a video of a Texan who has decided to join the Russian forces. Then, they take a look at a guy who browns his pants while driving, which leads to a conversation about F'ing when you need to brown. Also, we have another video of Luke Bryan hunting and it is just as good as the first one. The Main Mommies also discuss CP's favorite show "Euphoria" and the new Victoria's Secret model who has Down syndrome. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

16 Mar 20221h 25min

JEANS UP!! On this week's YMH, Tom Segura and Christina P discuss husbands watching their wives give birth, the BTK killer, peener size, and "Ozark." They watch a batch of "Horrible or Hilarious" videos and new videos of Fedsmoker buying cigarettes and fighting with a church band. Then, Chris Larson faces up against the newest YMH staffer, Chad, to see who the smartest person at YMH is. The Main Mommies quiz them on basic knowledge and U.S. citizenship questions, and the victor is surprising!   Jenny Pentland is a writer, childhood friend of Christina's, and Roseanne Barr's daughter. Her new memoir is called "This Will Be Funny Later." She joins Jean and Jean to discuss memories from growing up with Mommy Tina, watching her mom, Roseanne Barr, rise to fame, being babysat in the back of The Comedy Store, Tom Arnold joining her family, and her life now raising five boys. She wraps up by watching Christina's TikTok curations and Tom's "Horrible or Hilarious" clips. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Mar 20221h 45min