I viewed closeness as danger

This week, Emma is going down the rabbit hole about the villain origin story of all our abandonment and self-esteem issues: the words we speak (and don’t). From bullying and humiliation to rejection and why one throwaway comment from a 12-year-old can take 20 years to unlearn — Emma is breaking down how the brain prioritizes threats over compliments and how those middle-school identity formation years end up influencing who we date and how we cope.

Emma also tells the high school story she’s never really unpacked publicly — the one that confirmed her abandonment wounds, trust issues, and hyper-independence weren’t personality traits so much as survival skills.

If you’ve ever laid awake at night thinking about something someone said to you in seventh grade while your adult brain is like…hello?? We’re still doing this??? then welcome. You’re not alone.

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