His Girl Friday Movie Night: Alt-Valentine’s Romantic Comedy in a Vintage Theater (For Sleep or Love)

We’re back in the old movie house for a vintage alt-Valentines romcom. Arrive early for the trailers — what I would play at some alt-Valentines film festival. Plus, decades-old Valentines‑flavored messaging it's going to be grand.

Look, my daughter asked if I was doing a special episode for the upcoming "holiday," and I was like, "What holiday?"

"Valentines, did you get mom something."

“I am now,” Valentine’s… aka **** Halloween. Another holiday to unleash sugar onto our loved ones and watch them climb the ceiling...

Our feature film is His Girl Friday, which stars Cary Grant as ruthless newspaper editor Walter Burns. You are already familiar with Grant's character as the “Get Out” meme.

Rosalind Russell, the pride of Waterbury, CT, plays Hildy Johnson, star journalist. And I need to pause for a second — the movie is based on the play The Front Page, which has two male leads. In His Girl Friday Russell plays that lead and walks out of production for defining the cinematic accomplished female journalist (think Margot Kidder as Lois Lane).

So if Russell is not the pride of Waterbury, CT, she should be.

And for heaven’s sake, don’t try to figure out what the deal is with the giant cross marking the eastern side of the Brass City skyline (do you imagine a knee-high ghost town might creep you out)?

From Waterbury, let’s take I‑84 west and then north on the Thruway (or the Taconic Parkway if you’re in the mood for beauty and can drive 55) to Albany, the pride of New York. Heh — I’m still a 518-er by heart. Long live Fish Fry spots and Altamont Fair.

Any movie where Albany, NY, figures prominently is my kind of movie. In His Girl Friday, Albany winds up being the destination all along. Walter Burns’ motivations in the movie are to rescue Hildy Johnson from a languished life in Albany, NY. And after winning Hildy back, Walter immediately takes her to Albany for their honeymoon. The film is fast-paced and even breaks the fourth wall a few times. Good stuff — two Ironweeds up.

In the spirit of tough ladies (but unfortunately not Albany-centric), we have our first trailer for Some Kind of Wonderful: “…this is 1987. Did you know that a girl can be whatever she wants to be?” Mary Stuart Masterson’s character asks, as she deals with some doofus named Ray. Gawd, I had such a crush on that character growing up — Stoltz, you idiot.

And as mentioned at the top, a slew of other trailers I would consider alt-love stuff (in one case, explicitly because of the soundtrack). And, of course, I’m alt-signaling. I loathe Valentine’s Day. Besides selling chocolate and flowers, the holiday seems designed to exasperate loneliness and force wide one’s wallet.

I don’t know about y’all, but I’m still wrestling with the debt of the trinity of expensive American holidays just last year. Did that giant turkey dinner or flat screen under a gayly lit fake tree not say, "I love you?"

PS: Hamilton needs more Albany — Alexander married in with the Schuylers. The Burr “Dangerous Man” letter that boiled over the Burr feud was printed in the Albany Register — a ****** Van Rensselaer is mentioned in that letter. You couldn't get more Albany without a beaver and Henry Hudson.

Bleh — Albany should steal the logo of Alexander Hamilton doing the “Oh, oh, oh, what a feeling” Toyota jump off the top of the Hamilton star. Put it on the welcome to Albany sign with: "actually we killed Alexander Hamilton."