#86: "I want them to just know. I don't want to have to ask."

#86: "I want them to just know. I don't want to have to ask."

In this episode, we explore why this longing is so common, especially for women who learned early on to minimise their needs, stay attuned to others, and keep the peace.

We’ll unpack how the desire for someone to just know is often rooted in a fear of vulnerability, the fear of being seen, needing something, or risking disappointment. And why avoiding asking doesn’t actually protect us… it keeps our real needs unmet.

In this conversation, we’ll explore:

  • What’s really underneath the belief that “if I have to ask, it doesn’t count”

  • How self-abandonment and people-pleasing keep us silent

  • Why asking is not neediness, but self-responsibility

  • The difference between longing for attunement and avoiding vulnerability

  • How reclaiming your voice creates the possibility of being truly met

This episode isn’t about doing more emotional labour.
It’s about learning how to name what you need and allowing others the chance to meet you there.


🎁 Get my FREE masterclass on turning self-abandonment into unshakable self-trust


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🍯Learn how to get your needs met with ⁠NOURISHED⁠


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Episoder(104)

#102: How to Respond to DEFENSIVENESS

#102: How to Respond to DEFENSIVENESS

Does trying to talk to your partner sometimes feel like banging your head against a wall? You come with a genuine concern, and suddenly they're shutting down, deflecting, or turning it back on you, le...

24 Jun 32min

#101: Validation - What it actually is (& what it isn't)

#101: Validation - What it actually is (& what it isn't)

Validation might be one of the most misunderstood skills in relationships and also one of the most important.In this episode, Nathalie breaks down what validation actually is, why so many of us resist...

10 Jun 31min

#100: Self-Trust: Why it's so important & how to build it!

#100: Self-Trust: Why it's so important & how to build it!

In this episode, I go into the one foundation that every other relationship skill is built on: self trust. What it looks like when it's gone, how it got broken, and exactly how to start rebuilding it....

3 Jun 43min

#99: Hard truths we need to accept if we want relationships that last

#99: Hard truths we need to accept if we want relationships that last

Let's cut through the noise and talk about what long term relationships actually require and what we need to accept if we want one that lasts.In this episode we discuss: 🔥 why disappointment in love ...

27 Mai 53min

#98: Intellectualisation - Why knowing better doesn't translate into doing better!

#98: Intellectualisation - Why knowing better doesn't translate into doing better!

You've done the courses, read the books, know all the terms and you're still showing up the same way in relationships. Sound familiar?In this episode, we talk about the pattern of intellectualisation:...

20 Mai 32min

#97: "I stopped trying to bring things up because it never leads anywhere!"

#97: "I stopped trying to bring things up because it never leads anywhere!"

If you've stopped bringing things up in your relationship because it never seems to go well, this episode is for you.The tiptoeing. The rehearsing. The deciding it's just not worth the conflict. It fe...

13 Mai 41min

#96: Why you always lose yourself in relationships & how to stop!

#96: Why you always lose yourself in relationships & how to stop!

In this episode we talk about the most common pattern for women in relationships: Losing ourselves.We do it all the time: The over-giving, the pretending we are fine, the walking on eggshells, the set...

6 Mai 42min

#95: Over-Functioning - When Doing More Gets Us Less

#95: Over-Functioning - When Doing More Gets Us Less

If you're the one holding everything together in your relationship, you're planning, remembering, doing, this episode is for you.Over-functioning isn't a personality flaw. It's a pattern that made com...

29 Apr 47min

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