So You Wanna Have a Threesome? (ft. Gabrielle Alexa Noel)

So You Wanna Have a Threesome? (ft. Gabrielle Alexa Noel)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with writer, sex educator, and polyamorous creator Gabrielle Alexa Noel to talk about the fantasy everyone has — and the one that goes wrong the most: threesomes.

From “unicorn hunting” to couple privilege, from jealousy to communication, this episode breaks down what actually makes a threesome hot and what makes it awkward, performative, or emotionally messy.

Gabby and Alexa unpack why “the third is the star of the show,” why gifting a threesome is a red flag, why kissing rules are often a dealbreaker, and why straight couples may have an easier time swapping than finding a unicorn.


In this episode, we cover:

  • The biggest communication mistakes couples make
  • Why “creating safety” changes everything
  • Kissing rules some couples have
  • “Couple privilege and why it matters
  • Why the third needs to feel special
  • How to DM a third correctly (and what NOT to say)
  • Signs a couple isn’t actually ready
  • Emotional labor being offloaded onto the third
  • Why you should take the third on a date
  • Why swapping couples may be easier than unicorn hunting
  • Jealousy and insecurity during group sex
  • What to do when someone feels left out
  • Aftercare expectations and debriefs
  • Why porn positions aren’t realistic
  • STI prep, condom changes, and fluid bonding
  • Toys in threesomes
  • Single men’s best strategy for getting a threesome
  • Why romance still matters even in casual group sex


Thank you to the best waterproof sex blanket in the market, Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests dry and cozy ◡̈

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Episoder(112)

Former Sex Worker on Hiring a Male Escort, OnlyFans & the Loneliness Epidemic (ft. Coral Osborne)

Former Sex Worker on Hiring a Male Escort, OnlyFans & the Loneliness Epidemic (ft. Coral Osborne)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with Coral Osborne (@theunrealcoralosborne), sexologist, intimacy coach for men, former sex worker, and writer. Coral shares how sex work has ch...

9 Jul 56min

Pussy Worship 101: How to Give (and Receive) Pleasure Like a Pro (ft. Ashley Manta)

Pussy Worship 101: How to Give (and Receive) Pleasure Like a Pro (ft. Ashley Manta)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with sex educator, relationship coach, and OnlyFans creator Ashley Manta for a deep dive into pussy worship, oral sex, receiving pleasure, and w...

2 Jul 51min

Pt.2 - 3 Sluts, 3 Moods: Cream Pies, Pussy Health, & Feeling Chosen (Vee & Elle - Girls Gone Deep)

Pt.2 - 3 Sluts, 3 Moods: Cream Pies, Pussy Health, & Feeling Chosen (Vee & Elle - Girls Gone Deep)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for Part 2/2. Together they explore whether non-monogamy is really about unmet needs, what happens...

25 Jun 41min

Pt. 1 - 3 Sluts, 3 Moods: Postpartum Sex, Polyamory & Childfree Dating (Vee & Elle - Girls Gone Deep)

Pt. 1 - 3 Sluts, 3 Moods: Postpartum Sex, Polyamory & Childfree Dating (Vee & Elle - Girls Gone Deep)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for an honest conversation about sexuality, identity, motherhood, non-monogamy, desire, dating, pl...

18 Jun 45min

The Conversation About Porn We're Too Afraid to Have (ft. Noelle Perdue)

The Conversation About Porn We're Too Afraid to Have (ft. Noelle Perdue)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with porn historian, writer, and adult industry expert Noelle Perdue for a fascinating conversation about pornography, fantasy, sexuality, kink, tech...

11 Jun 56min

The Ethics of Public Sex: Consent, Kink & Social Norms (ft. Tara Michaela)

The Ethics of Public Sex: Consent, Kink & Social Norms (ft. Tara Michaela)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with sex educator Tara Michaela for a nuanced conversation about the ethics of public sex, public play, PDA, kink visibility, consent, social norms, ...

4 Jun 55min

Her Nudes Were Leaked. Now She Helps Victims Get Justice (ft. Norma Buster)

Her Nudes Were Leaked. Now She Helps Victims Get Justice (ft. Norma Buster)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Norma Buster, sex positive victims rights advocate, Chief of Staff at CA Goldberg Law, survivor of image-based abuse, and online sex worker, for...

21 Mai 57min

Inside a Real Open Marriage: Hiring Sex Workers, Outsourcing Anal & Adding Novelty (ft. Kate Shelor)

Inside a Real Open Marriage: Hiring Sex Workers, Outsourcing Anal & Adding Novelty (ft. Kate Shelor)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with hypnotherapist, content creator, and non-monogamy advocate Kate Shelor for an unfiltered conversation about open relationships, outsourcing fant...

14 Mai 59min

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