Why Your Fantasies Are Sexually Healthy

If you've ever felt ashamed of a sexual fantasy, I want you to know that having one isn't a sign that something is wrong with you — it's actually a sign of a healthy sex life. Fantasies can reveal what you truly crave, deepen your connection with a partner, and completely transform your relationship with your own desire. But most of us were never taught how to think about them, let alone talk about them out loud. In this episode, I'm breaking down what your fantasies actually mean, why you don't need to act on all of them, and exactly how to bring one up with a partner without it feeling terrifying. In this episode, you'll learn: • What the most common fantasies reveal about your psychological needs — and why the ones that embarrass you the most are usually the most telling • My step-by-step framework for communicating a fantasy to a partner (even if you've never done it before and have no idea where to start) • What to do if you can't seem to fantasize at all — including why a history of trauma or a conservative upbringing can shut down your erotic imagination, and how to gently rebuild it More Dr. Emily: • Shop With Emily! Explore Emily’s favorite toys, pleasure accessories, bedroom essentials, and more — designed to support your pleasure and confidence. Free shipping on orders $99+ (some exclusions apply).5 • Interested in 1:1 Coaching with Emily? Go to sexwithemily.com/coaching to apply! • Sex With Emily Guides: Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides. • The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure • Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website • Let’s get social: Instagram | X | Facebook | TikTok | Threads | YouTube • Let’s text: Sign up here • Want me to slide into your email inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. Timestamps: 0:00 - Intro 1:47 - The Most Common Fantasies (Group Sex, BDSM, Voyeurism & More) 3:50 - Listener Fantasy List: What YOU Shared on Instagram 6:12 - How to Bring Up a Fantasy to Your Partner (The Who, What, Where, When, Why Method) 8:24 - Fantasy vs. Fetish: What's the Difference? 9:09 - Caller Update: Tracy's Throuple Story 15:44 - "Is It Wrong to Fantasize About Someone Else While in a Relationship?" 17:33 - How to Find a Couple for a Threesome 20:32 - Latex Fetish & Pegging: How to Get Your Partner on Board 24:12 - How to Make the First Move Without Falling into the Friend Zone 28:26 - Foot Fetishes 101: How to Blow His Mind 31:03 - When Trauma Blocks Your Fantasy Life Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Episoder(1601)

Debunking the Biggest Myths About Sex and Desire

In this episode, I'm busting the biggest myths that are quietly running your relationship and your intimate life… the idea that men want it all the time, that women don't think about it nearly as much...

24 Jul 0s

How to Ask Your Body What It Actually Needs

In this episode, somatic practitioner Dolly Josette (aka The Pleasure Muse) is teaching us something that changed my life… how to actually listen to what our bodies are trying to tell us. We walk thro...

21 Jul 0s

Why the Spark Always Fades (& What Actually Lasts)

Throwback to one of my favorite conversations! That "spark" you're chasing? It might not be attraction… it might be a trauma response. I sat down with Dr. Scott Lyons to break down the difference betw...

17 Jul 1h 4min

How To Know What You Really Want in Bed

Today, we're diving into pillar four of Sex IQ: self-knowledge. This is the pillar that ties everything together, because once you understand your body (embodiment), your health, and how to collaborat...

14 Jul 35min

What I Wish I Knew About Sex in My 20s

In this episode, I'm going back to my 20s and telling you everything I wish someone had told me about sex back then. The reality is that almost nobody has a clue in their 20s, and we're all just figur...

10 Jul 44min

Why Self-Acceptance is the Key To Better Sex

In this episode, I'm covering the fifth pillar of Sexual Intelligence: self-acceptance. This is the pillar that ties everything else together, because no matter how embodied, healthy, collaborative, o...

7 Jul 34min

What I Wish I Knew About Sex in my 30s

In this episode, I'm breaking down everything I learned about sex and relationships in my 30s… because this decade taught me lessons my 20s never could. I used to think if the chemistry faded, the rel...

3 Jul 24min

The Secret to Magnetic Chemistry in Long-Term Relationships

Are you and your partner really collaborating in bed, or just going through the motions? In this episode, I'm diving deep into the third pillar of Sexual Intelligence: Collaboration. I break down why ...

30 Jun 34min