Chemistry Isn’t Compatibility: How to Choose Better Partners in Love and Work - w/ Matt Higgins

Chemistry Isn’t Compatibility: How to Choose Better Partners in Love and Work - w/ Matt Higgins

The psychology of healthy relationships: hidden rules behind better marriages, better teams, and better choices. In this episode, I sit down with legendary investor Matt Higgins to dissect the psychology of lasting relationships. It turns out that a staggering number of startups and marriages implode for the exact same reason: we mistake thrilling friction for long-term compatibility. We are remarkably bad at predicting who will actually help us bail water when the ship sinks. Rather than seeking our exact opposites to fill our gaps, evidence suggests we should hunt for a deeply unsexy but highly effective alternative: overlapping values. From the unexpected wisdom of arranged marriages to the quiet triumph of marrying your best friend, this is a delightfully sideways look at forming our most vital alliances. Why seeking your exact opposite is a fantastic recipe for mutual resentment The fascinating psychology behind why the fish always rots from the head in bad leadership How to utilize genuine self-awareness to build cheerfully boring, drama-free partnerships Listen in to discover the surprisingly positive science of selecting people who won't drive you mad. SPONSORS 🌳 ⁠⁠Acorns⁠⁠ Smart way to grow your money $5 welcome bonus ⁠⁠⁠Acorns.com/PSYCHOLOGY⁠⁠ NEW SHOW - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠How to Change the World: The History and Future of Innovation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn about the evolving story of the human species and our ideas told in chronological order. The podcast is full of fun facts, surprising stories and philosophical insights. Found on all major podcast players: Spotify - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1Fj3eFjEoAEKF5lWQxPJyT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Apple - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-change-the-world-the-history-of-innovation/id1815282649⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ YouTube - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HowToChangeTheWorldPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ --- UPGRADE to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Premium⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠: 🏖️ Ad-free listening 🤘 Support the show 🔓 Exclusive AMAs and bonus content ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠GrowthMindset.Supercast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Growth Mindset Psychology: Sam Webster explores the psychology of happiness, satisfaction, purpose, and growth through the lens of self-improvement. 📺 Watch - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube (Growth Mindset)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🛜 Website - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Growth Mindset⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📧 Email - GrowthMindsetPodcast (@) gmail.com CHAPTERS 00:00 Why Startups and Marriages Fail02:50 Arranged Marriages in Bangladesh and burning the boats06:43 Identical vs Shared Values10:33 How do you know someone is the one?12:24 Attachment Styles and Self-Awareness17:57 How do you mentor a CEO to become more self-aware?19:14 Wrap up Topics Covered Psychology of relationships and dating Choosing the right startup co-founder The difference between chemistry and compatibility Why startups fail from founder conflict Attachment styles in business and love Developing self-awareness and vulnerability as a leader The importance of shared values in marriage How to find a life partner Overcoming ego and improving emotional intelligence Matt Higgins business and investing advice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Episoder(508)

The Psychology of What Matters: How to Stop Wasting Time

The Psychology of What Matters: How to Stop Wasting Time

A psychological guide to choosing priorities, resisting urgency, and spending time well. Time is the universe’s most brilliant and inescapable invention, relentlessly marching forward whether you are...

7 Apr 23min

The Neuroscience of Growth Mindset: How to rewire your brain

The Neuroscience of Growth Mindset: How to rewire your brain

The human brain is a wonderfully absurd little organ. It powers civilization, invents jazz, and still somehow convinces you that being bad at something once, means you should never try again. In this...

31 Mar 36min

Are You Thinking Your Thoughts, Or Are They Thinking You?

Are You Thinking Your Thoughts, Or Are They Thinking You?

You like to think of yourself as someone who thinks for themselves. But what if the ideas running through your head aren't really yours — what if they found you, infected you, and quietly rewrote your...

24 Mar 34min

The Psychology of Never Feeling Good Enough (Even When You Clearly Are)

The Psychology of Never Feeling Good Enough (Even When You Clearly Are)

Hedonic adaption busily sweeps our wins under the rug like they are a nuisance. We look at how to fight back against your own psychology. I once ran further than 99.9% of humans ever will. Then wen...

20 Mar 23min

7 Weird Life-Changing Skills that are Strange to Work On

7 Weird Life-Changing Skills that are Strange to Work On

Nobody tells you that curiosity is a skill. Or that humor can be built. Or that the way you think is quietly deciding everything. Most of us are running on borrowed opinions — System One thinking dre...

17 Mar 59min

Why Having a Backup Plan Is Making You Fail - Burn the boats with Matt Higgins

Why Having a Backup Plan Is Making You Fail - Burn the boats with Matt Higgins

In 1519, Hernán Cortés landed in Mexico and promptly set fire to his own fleet. By any conventional measure of military logistics, this seems profoundly counterproductive. It wasn't. Matt Higgins — S...

13 Mar 44min

Why You Have Great Ideas but Never Actually Do Anything With Them

Why You Have Great Ideas but Never Actually Do Anything With Them

We are spectacularly good at having ideas and remarkably reluctant to do anything with them. It turns out that the distance between "I've got it!" and "here it is" is not a step but a rather long, oc...

10 Mar 22min

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