Your Identity Was Never Just Yours

Have you ever done the work — named the trauma, grieved the losses, started releasing the shame — and then looked up and thought… who am I? That disorientation isn't a problem. It's actually the beginning of something important.

In this episode, Jessica opens the June identity theme by introducing one of the most foundational questions in healing: where did your sense of self actually come from? Drawing on attachment theory and her clinical experience, she walks through the difference between your core self — the parts of you that were always there — and your adapted self — the version of you that learned how to survive. Most of us have spent so long living from the adapted self that we've lost touch with the core entirely. This episode is your invitation to start noticing the difference.

In This Episode

• Why identity doesn't form in a vacuum — and who was shaping yours before you had any say
• What attachment theory tells us about how we learned to see (or not see) ourselves
• The clinical distinction between your core self and your adapted self
• Jessica's personal story of performing the "Pinterest mom" identity — and what it cost her
• Why every major life transition is both disorienting and an invitation
• What's coming next in the June series

Resources & Links

🌿 Free worksheet — Core Self vs. Adapted Self: healingismyhobby.com/newsletter

📬 Newsletter: healingismyhobby.com/newsletter 📩 Contact Jessica: healingismyhobby.com 📸 Instagram: @healingismyhobby ▶️ YouTube: @healingismyhobby 🛋️ Clinical practice: jessicacolarcolcsw.com | @jessicacolarcolcsw

identity healing, who am I, core self vs adapted self, attachment theory, identity development, trauma and identity, adapted self, healing journey, self-worth, identity after trauma, childhood roles, people pleasing, performing identity, inner child work, IFS therapy, self-discovery, anxiety and identity, LCSW podcast, mental health podcast, therapy podcast for women, healing is my hobby, Jessica Colarco