Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson22 Jun

The Secret to Happiness: How to Feel Loved with Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky

Forrest is joined by one of the world's leading happiness researchers, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, to discuss the real secret to happiness: feeling loved. Dr. Lyubomirsky explains the key difference between being loved and feeling loved, why self-improvement (usually) isn’t the answer, and how giving love leads to getting love. They then walk through five mindsets that help people both get more love and feel more loved. Other topics include the vulnerability paradox, capitalization and the importance of enthusiasm, using the mindsets to evaluate our relationships, polyamory and non-monogamous love, and AI companions. You can find Sonja's diagnostic quiz at howtofeelloved.com About our Guest: Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky is a Professor of Psychology at UC Riverside, and the author of a number of bestselling books including How to Feel Loved with Dr. Harry Reis. She is one of the most frequently cited well-being researchers in the world. Key Topics: 0:00: Intro: connection as the key to happiness 2:31: The difference between being loved and feeling loved 6:58: What love is 9:09: If only beliefs and the vulnerability paradox 19:36: Mindsets to embrace if you're looking for more love and connection 23:26: The relationship “sea”saw 31:44: Five mindsets to embrace if you want to feel more loved 51:51: AI companionship, polyamory, and MDMA 1:08:03: Recap Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Visit Rula.com/BEINGWELL to find affordable, high-quality therapy that’s actually covered by insurance. Level up your bedding with Quince. Go to Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Episoder(481)

Burnout: A Practical Guide for Normal People

Dr. Rick and Forrest explore burnout: what it is, why it’s so common, and what people can do about it. They begin by framing burnout as largely a structural problem that individuals are forced to mana...

3 Aug 1h 15min

The Grieving Body: How to Heal After Loss with Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor

We all understand the emotional impact of grief, but its effects on the body are often overlooked. Forrest is joined by clinical psychologist and researcher Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor to explore the ph...

27 Jul 1h 28min

Healing from Parentification: When the “Gifted Child” Grows Up

Some kids learn early on that the way to be loved is to be useful. They take on the emotional or practical care of their parents in a process known as parentification, and today Dr. Rick and Forrest e...

20 Jul 1h 15min

Understanding Dissociation and DID: What It's Really Like, and How People Recover w/ Dr. Milissa Kaufman and Dr. Lauren Lebois

Most of what people know about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) comes from movies and short videos, and those media portrayals often have little to do with what DID is actually like. To get the re...

13 Jul 1h 26min

From Insight to Action: How to Face the Fear You Keep Avoiding

Dr. Rick and Forrest continue last week’s conversation on avoidance coping, this time focusing on how to move from insight into meaningful action. They explore why self-awareness often isn’t enough to...

6 Jul 1h 15min

Breaking the Avoidance Loop: Why You Keep Repeating the Same Patterns

We all have patterns we can see clearly…and still can't seem to stop. Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how avoidance fuels these patterns, and how we can break the avoidance loop by updating our expectati...

29 Jun 1h 7min

How to Repair: The Key to Successful Relationships

Last week, Dr. Rick and Forrest discussed why healthy conflict is a vital part of strong and intimate relationships. Today, they focus on the how-to of effective repair: what it looks like, why it’s s...

15 Jun 1h 24min