Dear Rachael: Am I Too Nice? The Myth of Women Loving Bad Boys and Men Loving Bitches

In this episode of STRIPPED, I answer a listener’s heartfelt question:

“Dear Rachael, I get the ‘You’re such a great guy’ speech more than I’d like to admit. I have good conversations, I listen, I try to be emotionally available. But I still somehow end up in the friend zone. Am I supposed to be an asshole, and why am always attracted to the girls who seem to prefer them?”

We dig into the truth behind the myths that women love bad boys and men love bitches.

Here’s the real story:

• Why we pick incompatible partners early on – We tend to repeat subconscious patterns that feel familiar, even if they don’t serve us.
• The work of healing those patterns – I share my own vulnerable story of breaking my old attraction patterns and how doing this opened me up to far more compatible, fulfilling relationships.
• Clarifying your values – Once you know what you truly want and value in a partner, you strip away the old patterns and create space for relationships that actually align with the kind of connection you’ve been craving.

Key Takeaway:

• It’s not that women actually want bad boys or that men love cruel women; it’s that they’re choosing these incompatible partners based on sub/ unconscious fears, insecurities, limiting beliefs, familiar dynamics, etc that serve some beneficial purpose. Once they investigate what the perceived benefit is, they can do the work to strip their patterns. Until then, my friend, they just won’t be ready to receive your greatness.

If you’ve ever wondered why you keep ending up with people who aren’t a great fit—or why the “good ones” don’t seem to spark your interest—this episode is for you.

Reflect: Ask yourself: What is MY dating pattern and how is it serving me?

Review: Please like, subscribe, and share this podcast so that your dating pool gets wider and filled with conscious daters like yourselves!

Reach Out:

Have a dating question? DM me on LinkedIN or send me an email at connect@hkrcoaching.com

Join my free monthly MeetUp: Free Dating Advice for Men From a Woman

Explore whether private coaching is the right next step by scheduling a complimentary Kick-Off Call!

Download my FREE Speed Dating Survival Guide for Men – for when you’ve only got a few minutes to make a connection and you wanna make them count!