Chasing Pleasure, Finding Meaning: What I Got Wrong in 7.5 Years of Sobriety

Chasing Pleasure, Finding Meaning: What I Got Wrong in 7.5 Years of Sobriety

Most people don't relapse because they wanted to drink. They relapse because they were still chasing pleasure — just in a legal package.

Anthony had 7.5 years of sober time before he picked up. In this episode, he breaks down the real reason long-term sobriety unravels: the war between pleasure and meaning, and why the recovery world is full of people white-knuckling a life they were never trained to actually want.

Covered in this episode: – The hedonic treadmill and why every "high" eventually feels like baseline – Anna Lembke's pleasure-pain balance (from Dopamine Nation) – Bruce Alexander's Rat Park study and why connection beats the lever – Cross-addiction: gym, golf, Instagram, work, achievement — the "ism swap" – Viktor Frankl, Dr. Joseph Lee, and the iPhone-vs-house metaphor that changed how Anthony sees addiction – Why "I don't need to feel good. I need to do good." is the line he comes back to

If you're newly sober and bored, or years in and quietly restless — this one's for you.

New episodes Tuesdays. Recovering Out Loud — real stories of addiction and recovery, no clinical voice, no guru energy.

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Episoder(139)

Surrender in Recovery — Why Letting Go Isn't Giving Up

Surrender in Recovery — Why Letting Go Isn't Giving Up

Surrender sounded like giving up — until it became the thing that finally let me stop losing.For years I thought surrender meant waving the white flag: defeat, quitting, rolling over. My ego hated it....

27 Aug 15min

The 12 Principles That Actually Keep You Sober

The 12 Principles That Actually Keep You Sober

Working the steps gets you sober. Living the principles keeps you there. All 12 — and why they hold.My mentor asks me one question: "How are you living today, Anthony?" It's easy to be a star in the r...

25 Aug 26min

10 Things Alcoholics Do That Normal Drinkers Don't

10 Things Alcoholics Do That Normal Drinkers Don't

Ten things I thought were normal until I got sober — supply math, pre-gaming, the morning panic. I'm not a doctor. I'm just a guy who did all ten of these, and didn't realize nobody else was living li...

22 Aug 19min

The Hidden Opportunities in Recovery (The Wins Nobody Claps For)

The Hidden Opportunities in Recovery (The Wins Nobody Claps For)

The wins nobody claps for are the ones that built your recovery. Here are the hidden ones.We throw parties for the first sober birthday and the first sober holiday. But nobody warns you about the firs...

20 Aug 24min

10 Weird Things My Alcoholic Brain Does in Recovery

10 Weird Things My Alcoholic Brain Does in Recovery

Ten weird things my alcoholic brain still does in recovery — and why none of them run my life anymore.I've been in recovery since 2015. I relapsed around seven and a half years in, and I'm back — a ye...

18 Aug 20min

Everything I Knew About Getting Sober Was Wrong (10 Myths)

Everything I Knew About Getting Sober Was Wrong (10 Myths)

Ten recovery myths that keep people stuck — from someone sober again after a hard relapse. Almost everything I thought I knew about getting sober turned out to be wrong, and some of it nearly cost me ...

15 Aug 23min

Staying Sober While Travelling, the Strivers' Curse & "We Could Have Missed It All"

Staying Sober While Travelling, the Strivers' Curse & "We Could Have Missed It All"

CHEF DEV IS BACK...A counsellor once asked Devan: what's wrong with the way you feel? This is that conversation. Chef Devan Rajkumar Today, he travels and cooks across different cities, constantly lea...

13 Aug 49min

The 5 Reactions to “I Don’t Drink” And How to Handle Them

The 5 Reactions to “I Don’t Drink” And How to Handle Them

What happens when you tell people you're sober — and how to handle every reaction.Getting sober is one job. Telling people you're sober is a completely separate one — and it never really ends. New par...

11 Aug 20min

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