When Disability Changes Again

Sometimes pushing forward looks like going faster. And sometimes it looks like recording a podcast from bed. In Episode 155 of Pushing Forward with Alycia, Alycia Anderson welcomes her husband, Marty Anderson, back to the microphone for one of their most personal conversations yet. Over the past several months, Alycia and Marty have found themselves navigating an unexpected medical journey that has included multiple hospitalizations, a bowel obstruction, a uterine embolization and the placement of a nephrostomy tube to protect Alycia’s functioning kidney while her body heals. But this episode is not simply a medical update. It is a conversation about aging with disability, something Alycia and Marty are discovering requires continuously getting reacquainted with bodies that change over time. Both are wheelchair users. Both live with different disabilities. And after nearly fifteen years of marriage, the couple is experiencing one of those seasons when the vows “in sickness and in health” become very real. When the Body Changes the Plan Alycia has spent a lifetime adapting. Born with a congenital disability, she describes herself in the episode as a “science project that’s gone right.” From the outside, people may simply see a wheelchair user. Internally, however, her anatomy and health are far more complex. Now, aging, disability and perimenopause are colliding in ways she could not have predicted. The physical challenges have also introduced something emotionally difficult for a lifelong achiever: being forced to slow down. Alycia admits that one of her greatest fears has not simply been the medical uncertainty. It has been losing momentum. After an incredibly successful Disability Pride Month, nine events, the company’s first live webinar and Alycia's Pitch Perfect competition win at Disability:IN, suddenly the body demanded something completely different. Rest. Running a Business When Life Says Stop Being self employed might seem like it would make dealing with illness easier. Alycia and Marty explain why the opposite can be true. There is no traditional medical leave. No department waiting to absorb the workload. No manager to tell that you will be unavailable for the month. When one partner becomes sick, the other is balancing caregiving, household responsibilities, client needs and the business itself. It has forced Marty into an even larger role while simultaneously asking Alycia to release control over work she deeply cares about. And for a self described Type A personality, that surrender has not come easily. When Both Partners Have Disabilities One of the most compelling parts of the conversation explores a question people have asked Alycia and Marty throughout their relationship: How will two disabled people take care of each other? Their answer is beautifully simple. They adapt. When Alycia became unable to transfer as easily after her hospitalization, Marty drew from years of disability experience and ordered a transfer board. They modified routines. They used equipment differently. They accepted home healthcare. They figured it out together. And while their disabilities can create additional logistical complications, Alycia says they also create something extraordinarily valuable within their relationship: understanding. Marty does not need an explanation of what it feels like when the body suddenly stops cooperating. Alycia does not need to translate disability for him. That shared understanding creates an intimacy rooted in lived experience. “I Don’t Have to Be the Strongest Person in the Room Every Day” Perhaps the most vulnerable moment comes when Marty asks Alycia what this season is teaching her. She does not manufacture an inspirational answer. Instead, she admits that she does not know yet. She is still inside it. But she is beginning to understand something important. It is okay to rest. It is okay to say she is too tired. It is okay to receive help. And it is okay not to be the strongest person in the room every single day. For someone whose career has been built around resilience, achievement and pushing forward, that may be one of the biggest adaptations of all. Love as an Accessibility Tool There is also a love story woven quietly through this episode. Alycia talks about lying in bed while recovering, looking over at Marty and feeling safe. She describes this medical season as a reminder of the depth their marriage has developed over time. Not because everything has been easy. Because it has not. But because when things become difficult, they know how to turn toward one another. Their marriage becomes another form of adaptation. Another form of access. Another reminder that independence does not have to mean doing everything alone. Episode Themes ♿ The Things Disability Keeps Teaching Us ♿ Aging with disability and adapting as bodies and needs change ❤️ Disabled love and marriage through unexpected medical challenges 🫶 Caregiving when both partners have disabilities 🩺 Navigating complex medical care and repeated hospitalizations 🛏️ Learning to rest without feeling like you are giving up 💼 Running a business during a health crisis 🧠 The emotional weight of losing independence and momentum 🔄 Adaptation as a lifelong disability skill 🤝 Letting other people show up for you 💛 Receiving care instead of always being the strong one 🦽 Accessible caregiving, transfers and changing mobility needs 🌱 Aging, disability and reengaging with your body 🙏 Surrendering control and trusting your support system 💡 Finding light while you are still inside the difficult season Unforgettable Quotes “There’s no other way for me to get better or to find what I am to learn and where I’m to grow from here than going straight through it.” ~ Alycia Anderson “Things can get complicated. Things can get severe. Things can get critical. But it’s how we carry ourselves.” ~ Marty Anderson Episode Chapters 00:00 Podcast Welcome 00:25 Medical Journey Update 03:32 Aging With Disability 05:47 Self Employed Stress 08:41 Procedures And Setbacks 11:49 New Normal Adapting 14:05 Lessons And Rest 15:50 Dual Disability Care 22:53 Pushing Forward Moments 26:58 Closing And Gratitude Connect with Alycia Anderson Visit⁠ ⁠⁠AlyciaAnderson.com⁠⁠⁠ to learn more about Alycia’s keynotes, disability inclusion programs, accessibility resources, and consulting services. Explore more episodes of⁠ ⁠⁠Pushing Forward with Alycia⁠⁠⁠. Pushing Forward is how we roll. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices