The Authentic Man Podcast with David Chambers: Dating, Relationship, Masculinity & Intimacy Guidance For Men30 Aug

Avoidant Men Series: Why Do I Shut Down Emotionally

She asks how you feel about something that matters — and your mind goes blank. Completely empty. You've got a hundred things you want to say, and you tell yourself it's fine, you don't need to say any of it. So you give her nothing.

In this episode I break down what's actually happening in your nervous system when you shut down. It isn't weakness, and it isn't a lack of feeling — it's a protection strategy you built long before this relationship.

You'll learn the belief that keeps you numb, why your silence reads as abandonment to her, and the five steps I used to come back out — catch it, ground it, name it, say it, and build the capacity.

This is episode 3 of the Avoidant Men series.

chapters:

00:00 Why You Go Quiet When It Matters Most

00:54 The Deer In The Headlights Moment

01:29 I Lost My Voice — How I Destroyed 3 Relationships

02:49 The Belief That Keeps You Numb: "Your Feelings Are Too Much"

05:11 Where It Comes From — Emotional Neglect

07:37 The Damage: To You, To Her, To The Relationship

09:00 The New Belief: Your Feelings Do Matter

10:00 I Used To Lie To Avoid Her Tears

12:22 1. Catch It — Notice The Shutdown

12:50 2. Ground & Breathe — Regulate Your System

13:25 3. Name It — "I Feel Numb / Tight Chest"

14:10 4. Say What's Happening — Speak The Struggle

15:15 5. Build Capacity Daily — Like Learning A Language

16:00 6 & 7. Safe Spaces & Why Mistakes Are The Practice

17:06 Where To Go From Here

RELATE:

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____________________

What To Do Next:

1️⃣ Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_/

2️⃣ Get specialised relationship and dating advice: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe

3️⃣ Go bag one of the resources below

____________________

🧨 RESOURCES 🧨

✅ Modern dating feels impossible? It doesn't have to stay that way. The Men's Dating Accelerator, master the most important skills: https://www.theauthenticman.net/mda-landing-page-direct-update-v2

Check out these FREE resources:

👉🏽 5 mistakes in embodying healthy masculinity: https://mailchi.mp/theauthenticman/masculinity-mistakes-in-dating-giveaway

👉🏽 The Hidden Mistakes Men Make in Dating & Relationships: https://mailchi.mp/faaf98ceedd8/hiddenmistakes

👉🏽 30 Dating App Conversation Starters: https://www.theauthenticman.net/app-openers-landing-page

👉🏽 Why You Keep Pulling Away: https://www.theauthenticman.net/why-you-keep-pulling-away-page

👉🏽 Why you are REALLY fighting - https://mailchi.mp/theauthenticman/why-you-keep-fighting?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=video&utm_campaign=conflict-guide

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