When Distress Turns Inward: Self-Harm and Suicidal Thoughts

This episode is a collaboration between School Can't Australia and Yellow Ladybugs made possible through funding from the Information, Linkages and Capacity Building Grant.

This is the second of two special episodes with Yellow Ladybugs, who are dedicated to the happiness, success, and celebration of autistic girls, women, and gender diverse folk.

Leisa is joined again by founder Katie Koullas and Natasha Staheli. In the first episode of this series, they talked about distress that is channelled outwards. This time, the conversation turns to distress that is channelled inwards: self-harm and suicidal ideation in our young people, and what it is like to parent through it.

Content warning: This episode contains detailed discussion of parenting young people who are self-harming and experiencing suicidal ideation. Please take care of yourself as you listen. Hit pause whenever you need to, and come back when you're ready.

If you or your young person are not safe right now, please call Triple Zero (000) for assistance. If you are feeling overwhelmed or distressed, please reach out to Lifeline: call 13 11 14, text 0477 13 11 14, or chat online at lifeline.org.au.

This is a conversation that almost never happens in public. Katie, Natasha, and Leisa talk about why families carry this so privately, why autistic and high-masking young people are especially vulnerable, particularly in the early teen years, and why well-meant reassurance and problem-solving can land as not being heard.

They explore what it means to respond rather than react, starting with "I believe you". They cover safety planning, protective factors such as peer connection, a safe place to unmask, and access to joy, and the difference between an acute crisis and the chronic, long-running experience that many families quietly live with. They also talk honestly about how hard it is to judge when hospital is the right call, and about the hypervigilance, guilt, and exhaustion that parents carry along the way.

There is no fix-it list in this episode, and no perfect response. What there is: three parents speaking plainly about a reality many families are living, and the reminder that many young people do come through this and look back grateful for the adults who stayed alongside them.

Nothing in this conversation replaces professional advice about your own child's safety. If you are worried about immediate risk, please seek help straight away.

You are not alone.