HAIRY FOREARMS

Are you looking for advice? Do you have a saucy story from travelling the globe? Leave us a voicemail and we might never get back to you...

Titty is in San Diego, Georgie is in Grand Cayman, and a stranger has recognised Titty out of drag… by her hairy arms. Georgie can top that: a man in a café with hair right down to his knuckles, trailing his forearm through his eggs Benedict.

In What Are You Wearing, Titty is surfing in California, with a not-so-small surfboard taped to her body, Hawaiian flowers, rhinestone goggles and neoprene stiletto wetsuit heels. Georgie has raided the charity shop: a patchwork ball gown with the price tags still on, six-inch flip-flops and a ginger wig with the whole shop front in it, window display and all.

In Excess Baggage, a fire station that's now a Starbucks, Georgie's big night out at Tyla, and who would last longest in the new Hunger Games (not Titty, she'd be dead in five minutes looking for a snack). Then Georgie has discovered spicy hockey romance novels, and the pages are sticking together.

In Message in a Bottle, Sarah from Clitheroe has the perfect husband: great job, lovely hair, wonderful dad. There's just one problem in the bedroom, and our advice is, as always, entirely unqualified.

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🎙️ Got a dilemma, a saucy story or a burning question? Leave us a voicemail and we might play it on the show: https://rss.com/podcasts/uptheaft/voicemail/ (or DM us on Instagram @uptheaft).

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Titty Kaka: @titty_kaka

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Until next time, stay salty (and keep your forearms out of the eggs)!