Changing Your Relationship to Shame

Changing Your Relationship to Shame

Shame is one of the most complex and difficult emotions we experience on a regular basis, and one that can have seriously negative impacts on our sense of self-worth and ability to experience healthy connection with others. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson take a deep dive into what shame is, how it develops, and what distinguishes it from guilt and other related emotions. They then focus on questioning our assumptions about shame, which can help us identify where it comes from. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:40: The biological roots of shame 4:00: Shame's ties to our assumptions about the world 7:00: Impropriety, and shame as a psychological stage of development 9:55: Distinguishing shame from guilt 14:00: Unnecessary shame, healthy remorse, and your own integrity system 21:55: Who decides what being good looks like? 25:40: Morality in the service of power 32:20: What helps us work with experiences of shame 38:25: Isolation and the value of sharing with others in some way 43:50: Working with your shame story 49:00: Shame, group belonging, and personal change 51:25: Recap Rick's Grief and Loss Workshop: We all face losses in life, from separation and disappointment to shocking, even traumatic events. Join Rick August 13 and 14 for 7 hours of LIVE, online teaching focused on learning simple, powerful practices that help us come to terms with them, heal, and find happiness again. Use coupon code BeingWell50 at checkout for an additional $50 off the registration price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episoder(463)

Limerence, Love, and Life Transitions: January Mailbag

Limerence, Love, and Life Transitions: January Mailbag

Dr. Rick and Forrest begin the mailbag by exploring limerence – an obsessive form of romantic attraction – and offer practical recommendations for working with one-sided infatuation. They then discuss...

13 Jan 20251h 4min

Navigating Situationships: How to Get What You Really Want

Navigating Situationships: How to Get What You Really Want

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore "situationships" – those poorly defined, boundary-free relationships that exist in a gray area between friendship and committed dating. They unpack why these arrangements ...

6 Jan 20251h 5min

Beyond Resolutions: Discover What You Want in 2025

Beyond Resolutions: Discover What You Want in 2025

Why do New Year's resolutions usually fail by February? Forrest and Dr. Rick explore why traditional goal-setting falls short and offer a new approach to creating lasting change. They discuss how we c...

30 Des 20241h 15min

Attachment Masterclass: Sue Johnson, Rick Hanson, Julie Mennano, and Elizabeth Ferreira

Attachment Masterclass: Sue Johnson, Rick Hanson, Julie Mennano, and Elizabeth Ferreira

Why do some people navigate the social world with such ease while others feel like they're swimming upstream? In this special episode of Being Well, Forrest is joined by four leading experts for a mas...

23 Des 20241h 59min

Working with Your Parts: Complex PTSD, Dissociation, and Hypervigilance with Elizabeth Ferreira

Working with Your Parts: Complex PTSD, Dissociation, and Hypervigilance with Elizabeth Ferreira

Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins the show to discuss complex trauma, dissociation, and working with challenging emotions. Forrest and Elizabeth start by exploring the relationship between In...

16 Des 20241h 19min

Anxious and Avoidant in Relationship: The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic

Anxious and Avoidant in Relationship: The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic

We all have different needs for closeness and distance, for intimacy and independence. You might have heard terms like anxious or avoidant attachment to describe this, and these tendencies can create ...

9 Des 20241h 21min

Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn

Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn

Why does change feel so difficult, even when we desperately want it? Dr. Ross Ellenhorn joins the show to explore our resistance to change, and the many good reasons we might have to stay just as we a...

2 Des 20241h 16min

Now What? What to Do When Things Fall Apart

Now What? What to Do When Things Fall Apart

Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs: a sudden job loss, a relationship ending, a health crisis, or losing faith in something. These moments can leave us feeling overwhelmed, lost, and uns...

25 Nov 20241h 11min

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