Is this going to help me end my porn struggle?

Is this going to help me end my porn struggle?

When I meet with a client for the first time during one of my free consults, I often hear this question asked in a variety of ways. “Is this going to help me eliminate my pornography struggle?“ What they are usually looking for is a confirmation that the work I do with people is going to be the very last thing they need to solve their pornography struggle. My standard answer is, “I don’t know if this is the last thing you need to know or just the next thing that you need to know. But everyone who struggles needs to know what I teach.” So, let me tell you guys what I do that helps people solve their pornography struggle in a way that sets them up for success. I want to start by saying that if you keep working at it, you aren’t failing, you are succeeding. The process I teach is a simple one that uses the techniques I’ve learned from the life coach school and the CTFAR model that was developed by Booke Castillo and Acceptance and Commitment Coaching developed by Steven C. Hayes Within those two systems, I help people learn how to solve for pornography with a variety of skills that I teach in three different settings. The three coaching settings that I have right now starts with individual coaching, where you and I work together for about 6 months and we focus on your individual needs. I teach and coach you alone during 12, 30-minute sessions. This gives us a thread of work to follow and a lot of people see their best work happen during these sessions. The second way that I get people moving in the right direction, is with my coaching membership. The coaching membership includes 4 open coaching calls each month, 2 for men and 2 for women. This usually breaks down along the lines of people struggling with Pornography and their wives, but that is not always the case. There are a number of women who participate in the women’s calls that also struggle with pornography. In this setting, I coach along with Darcy on the women’s calls and we help those who volunteer to be coached to get a different perspective on where they are and how they can move forward. The third way I help people is, once a year, I set up a group coaching program. If you’re a part of my mailing list, you will have gotten a coupon code to join that for 55% off this year. In the group coaching program, we get together weekly and coach just those in the group. Many of whom go on to be highly successful in their path away from their pornography struggle. If you want to learn more about how each of those work, feel free to set up a consult with me by going to zachspafford.com/workwithme. Or you can just email me at info@zachspafford.com So the next thing that you’ll want to know is, what do I teach. A lot of the things I teach are things I teach on this podcast. There are also some that I don’t teach on the podcast. That said, one of the main things that I teach is to become aware of the thoughts and feelings that are going on for you. I teach you how to become more aware and how to use that awareness to improve your ability to make the decisions that you want. I also teach you some really important things that your brain is doing, like, the motivational triad, confirmation bias, and feeling good in ambiguity among other things. These simple things that your brain does automatically, are part of the reason that pornography has such a powerful draw. Understanding how they work and what they do in your life that is helpful and not helpful is an ally in the process of retraining your responses to improve your outcomes when it comes to pornography. Being aware and understanding how your brain works give you a base to start from. Add that to skills designed specifically to deal with urges,...

Episoder(169)

Will More Sex Will Solve My Porn Problem?

Will More Sex Will Solve My Porn Problem?

I used to think that once my wife and I could have sex because we were married that my pornography problem would go away. Then when we got married and my pornography problem kept going, I used to thi...

22 Aug 202212min

If you watch porn again, I'm divorcing you

If you watch porn again, I'm divorcing you

Find more at zachspafford.com

15 Aug 202235min

How do I trust my spouse after pornography use

How do I trust my spouse after pornography use

Create realistic expectations - Not expecting my husband to commit to things I know he doesn’t have skills for. Looking honestly at yourself Could you honestly commit to eliminating your coping mech...

8 Aug 202226min

How do I get my wife to trust me again

How do I get my wife to trust me again

Three secrets to creating trust after pornography Here is the truth of it. You can not make your wife trust you again. You do not have control over if your wife trusts you. All you can do is be someo...

1 Aug 202223min

Becoming More Desirable

Becoming More Desirable

One of the books that I have often recommended to my clients is a work by Dr. Robert Glover. His book, No More Mr. Nice Guy is a guide to men who have struggled to get what they want in “love, sex, ...

25 Jul 202221min

Overcoming Pornography Takes Time - Just like your yard

Overcoming Pornography Takes Time - Just like your yard

I had a conversation with a friend of mine who while we are about the same age, he started his family well after I did. His two kids are the same age as our youngest two kids. We worked together in ...

18 Jul 202211min

Overcome Pornography Client Interview - Josh and Amber

Overcome Pornography Client Interview - Josh and Amber

In this interview with Josh and Amber, we discuss their success and how overcoming pornography has made their lives better.

11 Jul 202234min

Overcoming Pornography Even When We Feel Shame

Overcoming Pornography Even When We Feel Shame

This week in the membership one of my members was talking about the question that another member had asked during our previous session. The man I was coaching said, “when That guy asked that questio...

4 Jul 202221min

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