Dan Harris

Dan Harris

This week on The One You Feed we have Dan Harris.
Dan is best known for his work on ABC News, Nightline and Good Morning America, but we invited him on the show because of his latest book: 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works--A True Story.
I was fascinated by this book. Dan was driven to meditation and self help out of a self imposed crisis after he had a panic attack on national TV. His journey through that landscape mirrored my own to some degree. He had a degree of skepticism from the beginning that he retains today. He also was perplexed by the paradox that most fascinates me: What is the degree that serenity can erode our ambition?
Going from the esoteric teachings of Eckhart Tolle to the down to earth practical modern buddhism of Mark Epstein (author of the classics Going to Pieces Without Falling Apart and Thoughts without a Thinker) he was able to find an approach that worked for him. The book is insightful, hilarious and very instructive.
In This Interview Dan and I Discuss...

The One You Feed parable.
That the mind can be trained for compassion and happiness.
Exercising the brain just like the body.
The science of meditation.
The message for people who are skeptical of meditation.
The voice in my head is an asshole.
10% happier not unicorns and rainbows.
What meditation isn't.
Reading Eckhart Tolle.
Our tendency to focus on the bad things and ignore the good.
The difference between constructive anguish and useless rumination.
The difference between pain and suffering.
"the craving to be elsewhere, to be otherwise, permeated my life"
The tendency to project into the future.
"The background static of perpetual discontent".
How we are like colicky babies who are never quite satisfied.
His conflicted view on the tendency to never be satisfied.
How dissatisfaction can drive us forward.
When it is useful to keep pushing and when is it better to back down?
The happiness set point theory.
Raising our emotional set point.
Ambition versus satisfaction.
Motivation coming from happiness versus pain.
Not being attached to the results.
Romanticizing melancholy.
How a certain amount of stress is necessary.
Being happy does not work at cross purposes to being successful.
Dealing with failure.
How when our minds wander we are less happy.
Meditation in less than 140 characters.
Remembering to feed the good wolf.
How one of the meanings of mindfulness is remembering.
Training to be less of an asshole.

Dan Harris Links
Dan Harris page on ABC News
Purchase 10% Happier
Dan Harris on Twitter


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Episoder(942)

Finding Hope When Life Isn’t Okay and the Power of Micro Joys with Cyndie Spiegel

Finding Hope When Life Isn’t Okay and the Power of Micro Joys with Cyndie Spiegel

In this episode, Cyndie Spiegel discusses finding hope when life isn’t okay and the power of microjoys. Cyndie shares her personal journey through profound loss and illness, explaining how micro joys, the simple, everyday pleasures, helped her heal. She explores the difference between happiness and joy, the importance of presence and gratitude, and practical ways to notice and appreciate micro joys, offering listeners compassionate tools for resilience and self-acceptance.Discover the six hidden saboteurs that quietly derail your best intentions—like autopilot behavior, self-doubt, and emotional escape. Download our free guide to uncover what’s getting in your way and learn simple strategies to take back control. Get it now at oneyoufeed.net/ebook.Key Takeaways:Concept of “micro joys” as small moments of joy amidst grief and hardship.Personal experiences of loss and challenges faced in 2020.Distinction between happiness and joy, emphasizing joy as a deeper, more enduring state.The importance of acknowledging both joy and pain in life.Critique of the self-help industry and the pressure to achieve constant happiness.The role of mindfulness and presence in recognizing micro joys.Strategies for cultivating gratitude and awareness in daily life.The significance of reflection and memory in appreciating past joys.Discussion on the balance between distraction and facing emotions during grief.Encouragement to adopt simple daily practices to foster appreciation and presence.If you enjoyed this conversation with Cyndie Spiegel, check out these other episodes:Navigating Fear and Hope: the Everyday Courage That Shapes Our Lives with Ryan HolidayFinding Your Way to Healing, Hope, and Peace with Seth GillihanThe Path to Inexplicable Joy: How Self-Friendship Can Change Everything with Susan PiverThis episode is sponsored by AG1. Your daily health drink just got more flavorful! Our listeners will get a FREE Welcome Kit worth $76 when you subscribe, including 5 AG1 Travel Packs, a shaker, canister, and scoop! Get started today!LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more.For full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

26 Aug 1h 2min

The Science of Emotions: How Your Brain Predicts Your Feelings with Lisa Feldman Barrett

The Science of Emotions: How Your Brain Predicts Your Feelings with Lisa Feldman Barrett

In this episode, Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett explains the science of emotions and how your brain predicts your feelings. She further explains that because emotions are made and not hardwired, this means we can change them by retraining our brains. Lisa also delves into the science of prediction, the body budget, and why taking care of your physical health is one of the most powerful emotional regulation tool you have.Want tiny nudges that spark real change? Join our text list for free Good Wolf reminders - short, inspiring messages to bring you back to what’s important. Sign up here!Key Takeaways:The nature of emotions from a neuroscientific perspective.The concept that emotions are constructed by the brain rather than hardwired.The brain’s predictive nature and its role in emotional experience.The principle of degeneracy in neural pathways and its implications for behavior.The significance of interoception in shaping emotions and internal bodily sensations.The relationship between physical states (like hunger and fatigue) and emotional experiences.The importance of emotional granularity in identifying and labeling emotions.The connection between mood disorders and physical health.Practical strategies for emotional regulation, including mindfulness and self-care.The integration of neuroscience with philosophical perspectives on perception and experience.This episode is sponsored by AG1. Your daily health drink just got more flavorful! Our listeners will get a FREE Welcome Kit worth $76 when you subscribe, including 5 AG1 Travel Packs, a shaker, canister, and scoop! Get started today!For full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

22 Aug 46min

Be the Change You Want to See with Ukeme Awakessien Jeter

Be the Change You Want to See with Ukeme Awakessien Jeter

In this episode, Ukeme Awakessien Jeter explores the importance of learning to be the change you want to see. She shares her journey as an immigrant and Black woman in a predominantly white suburb, discussing adaptability, leadership, and civic engagement. She reflects on raising her daughter, building inclusive communities, and the unique leadership strengths immigrants bring. The conversation also touches on feeling overwhelmed in life as Ukeme reminds us that when our days feel full to bursting, it might just mean they are filled with things that we deeply value.Every Wednesday, we send out A Weekly Bite of Wisdom – a short, free email that distills the big ideas from the podcast into bite-sized practices you can use right away. From mental health and anxiety to relationships and purpose, it’s practical, powerful, and takes just a minute to read. Thousands already count on it as part of their week, and as a bonus, you’ll also get a weekend podcast playlist to dive deeper. Sign up at oneyoufeed.net/newsletter!Key Takeaways:Adaptability and its importance in navigating new environments and challenges.The personal experiences of an immigrant and a Black woman in a predominantly white community.The impact of racial isolation on children and the importance of fostering inclusion.The significance of civic engagement and community involvement in driving change.The role of leadership in addressing systemic issues and promoting diversity.The concept of “feeding the good wolf” as a metaphor for nurturing positive qualities.The value of asking “how” questions to encourage understanding and collaboration.The challenges and strategies for building authentic connections in diverse communities.The importance of cultural intelligence and authenticity in leadership.The need for intentional efforts to create inclusive environments for future generations.Your daily health drink just got more flavorful! If you head to drinkag1.com/feed you’ll also get a FREE Welcome Kit worth $76 when you subscribe, including 5 AG1 Travel Packs, a shaker, canister, and scoop!” Visit drinkag1.com/feed to get started.If you enjoyed this conversation with Ukeme Awakessien Jeter, check out these other episodes:Conscious Leadership with Eric KaufmannDiscovering Your Inner Resilience and Strength with Mark NepoFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

18 Aug 1h 7min

How to Build a Family Culture That Brings You Closer and Makes You Stronger with Steven Shapiro and Nancy Shapiro Rapport

How to Build a Family Culture That Brings You Closer and Makes You Stronger with Steven Shapiro and Nancy Shapiro Rapport

In this episode, Steven Shapiro and Nancy Shapiro discuss how to build a family culture that brings you closer and makes you stronger. They are a brother and sister duo, educators and creators of the “Our Family Culture” system. Steven and Nancy discuss the importance of intentionally shaping family culture to support children’s emotional well-being and resilience and they share practical strategies for identifying core values, developing shared language, and practicing consistent, meaningful actions within families. They highlight how conscious culture-building can strengthen family bonds, foster healthy development, and create a positive legacy across generations.To receive a 33% discount on the Our Family Culture app, enter the code WOLF at checkout!Key Takeaways:The concept of “family culture” and its impact on children’s emotional and mental well-being.The importance of intentionality in shaping family culture versus allowing it to develop by default.The role of core values in guiding family dynamics and behaviors.The significance of creating a supportive emotional environment for children.The challenges parents face in raising children, including mental health concerns and societal pressures.The idea of generational legacy and how parenting styles are often replicated or opposed by children.Practical strategies for families to engage in culture-building, including small, manageable actions.The dynamic nature of family culture and the importance of collaboration among family members.Tools and resources to facilitate meaningful conversations about values within families.f you enjoyed this conversation with Steven and Nancy, check out these other episodes:How to Manage Family Relationships with Nedra Glover TawwabHow to Make Great Relationships with Dr. Rick HansonPurposeful Living: Strategies to Align Your Values and Actions with Victor StrecherFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

15 Aug 55min

When Success Hides Suffering: Understanding High Functioning Depression with Dr. Judith Joseph

When Success Hides Suffering: Understanding High Functioning Depression with Dr. Judith Joseph

In this episode, Dr. Judith Joseph explains what happens when success hides suffering, and the importance of understanding high-functioning depression. She explores why many people who look fine on the outside are quietly suffering on the inside with something we rarely talk about: anhedonia, the loss of joy, or the loss of ability to feel pleasure. This is an important conversation that highlights this often overlooked and underplayed challenge of high-functioning depression that so many of us deal with, and most importantly, how to overcome it.Key Takeaways:Concept of high-functioning depression and its characteristicsSymptoms of anhedonia and their impact on daily lifeLimitations of current diagnostic criteria for depressionImportance of early recognition and intervention for mental health issuesBiopsychosocial model for understanding mental healthRole of personal agency and choice in managing mental healthStrategies for emotional validation and expressionThe significance of reconnecting with personal values for joyImpact of technology and social connections on mental well-beingImportance of celebrating small wins and planning for future joyIf you enjoyed this conversation with Dr. Judith Joseph, check out these other episodes:How Identity Can Affect How You Deal with Depression with Kimi CulpEmerging Perspectives on Depression with Alex RileyStrategies for Depression with Therese BorchardFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

12 Aug 58min

Why Ethics and Joy Belong Together with Peter Singer

Why Ethics and Joy Belong Together with Peter Singer

In this episode, Peter Singer explains why ethics and joy belong together. He offers a moral wake-up call as he shares his now-famous “drowning child” thought experiment: if we saw a child drowning right in front of us, we’d act without hesitation. So why do we so often fail to act when suffering is farther away?Peter challenges the idea that ethics is about rigid rules or self-denial. Instead, he argues that living ethically is a path to a more joyful and meaningful life. This conversation explores how generosity, purpose, and even activities done purely for pleasure—like surfing—can all be part of a good life.Feeling overwhelmed, even by the good things in your life?Check out Overwhelm is Optional — a 4-week email course that helps you feel calmer and more grounded without needing to do less. In under 10 minutes a day, you’ll learn simple mindset shifts (called “Still Points”) you can use right inside the life you already have. Sign up here for only $29!Key Takeaways:[00:02:31] Ethical obligations in everyday life.[00:06:45] Helping those in extreme poverty.[00:10:46] Happiness and moral responsibility.[00:11:45] Moral progress in civilization.[00:16:12] Saving children from malaria.[00:21:02] Measuring happiness effectively.[00:25:02] Happiness and money connection.[00:27:43] Personal identity and change.[00:32:00] Spiritual path and personal satisfaction.[00:43:05] Enjoying non-competitive activities.If you enjoyed this conversation with Peter Singer, check out these other episodes:Purposeful Living: Strategies to Align Your Values and Actions with Victor StrecherHow to Create a Life Strategy for Meaningful Change with Seth GodinFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

8 Aug 45min

The Path to Inexplicable Joy: How Self-Friendship Can Change Everything with Susan Piver

The Path to Inexplicable Joy: How Self-Friendship Can Change Everything with Susan Piver

In this episode, Susan Piver discusses the path to inexplicable joy and how self-friendship can change everything. She shares this powerful statement, “I can’t defeat my enemies, but I can strengthen my friends,” which offers a different kind of hope that shifts our focus from fighting battles we can’t win, to caring for the people and communities closest to us. Susan shares what real power looks like, not dominance, but care, and also shares five practical ways to cultivate personal power in everyday life. This is an episode about moving from overwhelm to meaningful action. One friendship, one moment of care at a time.Feeling overwhelmed, even by the good things in your life?Check out Overwhelm is Optional — a 4-week email course that helps you feel calmer and more grounded without needing to do less. In under 10 minutes a day, you’ll learn simple mindset shifts (called “Still Points”) you can use right inside the life you already have. Sign up here for only $29!Key Takeaways:Personal empowerment and its significance in daily life.The practice of mindfulness and its role in self-awareness.Exploration of Buddhist teachings, particularly the Heart Sutra.The concept of interconnectedness and its implications for personal and communal well-being.The parable of the two wolves and its relevance to nurturing positive qualities.The importance of self-care and creating a supportive physical environment.Practical steps for cultivating personal power and confidence.The relationship between meditation and self-acceptance.The distinction between relative and absolute views in understanding existence.The role of compassion in personal growth and community connection.If you enjoyed this conversation with Susan Piver, check out these other episodes:How to Discover Your Way of Being Through the Enneagram with Susan PiverThe Four Noble Truths of Love with Susan Piver (2021)Ancient Wisdom Meets Modern Life: Finding Ease and Clarity with Charlie GilkeyFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

5 Aug 1h

Finding Meaning Through Caregiving, Loss, and Writing with Nickolas Butler

Finding Meaning Through Caregiving, Loss, and Writing with Nickolas Butler

In this episode, Nickolas Butler explores finding meaning through caregiving, loss, and writing. At just 20 years old, Nick became his father’s legal guardian after a sudden brain aneurysm — a role he held for 23 years. What began as a family emergency became a long, complex journey that shaped his identity, his values, and his voice as a novelist. In this honest and moving conversation, Nick shares the emotional toll and unexpected wisdom that caregiving can bring, the power of presence, and how life’s hardest roles can also become its most transformative. Nick also discusses his latest novel, A 40 Year Kiss — a tender, hopeful story of second chances, aging, and old love — and how paying attention to real people’s stories fuels his fiction. If you’re navigating caregiving, grieving a loved one, or wondering how to stay open to creativity during hard seasons, this episode offers comfort, insight, and quiet strength.Feeling overwhelmed, even by the good things in your life?Check out Overwhelm is Optional — a 4-week email course that helps you feel calmer and more grounded without needing to do less. In under 10 minutes a day, you’ll learn simple mindset shifts (called “Still Points”) you can use right inside the life you already have. Sign up here for only $29!Key Takeaways:Caregiving and the emotional complexities involved in becoming a legal guardian at a young age.The impact of caregiving on personal identity and life experiences over a long duration.The evolution of storytelling and the importance of listening to others’ stories in writing.The contrast between Butler’s darker previous works and his latest novel, which focuses on themes of love, family, and redemption.The exploration of “old love” and the realities of long-term relationships versus contemporary portrayals of romance.The challenges and nuances of aging, wisdom, and the search for guidance in later life.The personal relationship between the writer and their craft, including the writing process and routines.The complexities of addiction and recovery, particularly in relation to alcohol use.The significance of community and shared experiences, as illustrated through sports and personal anecdotes.The importance of embracing ambiguity and the nuanced nature of human relationships in both life and art.If you enjoyed this conversation with Nickolas Butler, check out these other episodes:How to Embrace the Important Elements of Life with Nickolas ButlerA Journey to Self-Discovery and Sobriety with Matthew QuickFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

1 Aug 1h 5min

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