Mini Episode #6-Rumination

Mini Episode #6-Rumination

Eric explores rumination and how damaging it can be to our mental health.

What is it?
What's the difference between rumination and self reflection?
Hebb's Law and the role it plays in rumination.
How to escape rumination.

Rough Transcript:

A few weeks ago I was at one of the local meditation centers and people were doing walking meditation. There was a guy walking incredibly slow and everyone was backing up behind him because no one but a disabled snail can move at that pace. So people weren’t doing walking meditation they were standing and looking at this guy with a grouchy look on their faces.
So I decided to stop him and explain that no one else could enjoy the meditation experience and it would be helpful if he could go just a bit faster.
A few minutes later we sat back down for sitting meditation and my mind began racing. Should I not have said anything? Was I rude? Was this guy angry? So I decided that when we got up I would go over to him and explain myself and make sure we were good. Problem solved….except not for my mind. On and on it went re-playing the scene and thinking about the upcoming conversation.
This is commonly know as rumination or brooding.
Rumination is the compulsively focused attention on the symptoms of one's distress, and on its possible causes and consequences, as opposed to its solutions. Rumination is generally considered differently than self-reflection. Self-reflelction tends to offer new insights wheras rumination is just playing the same negative thoughts and feelings over and over.

You will never plow a field by turning it over in your mind-
Irish Proverb

The challenge with rumination (or brooding) is that it feels like we are doing something about the issue or problem by continuing to think about it and ponder it. However rumination is extremely destructive and has been strongly linked to deep depression and anxiety. In fact a The UK's biggest ever online test into stress, undertaken by the BBC's Lab UK and the University of Liverpool, has revealed that rumination is the biggest predictor of the most common mental health problems in the country.
The tricky thing is that worry and rumination can seem essential part of coping effectively. The idea of letting go of rumination and worry can be frightening. The ironic thing is that rumination tends to increase anxiety and effectiveness in problem solving goes down as anxiety increases.
In addition a mind that ruminates becomes more likely to continue to do it. We have talked on the show about how we create pathways in our brain that become every easier to fall into the more reengage them. This is not a fanciful idea or silly positive thinking. Neurosccience has something called Hebbs Law. The phrase, “neurons that fire together wire together” The meaning of Hebb’s axiom is that each experience we encounter, including our feelings, thoughts, sensations, and muscle actions becomes embedded in the network of brain cells, that produce that experience. Each time you repeat a particular thought or action, you strengthen the connection between a set of brain cells or neurons.
Think of it like taking a walk in the woods. Your thoughts are like hikers. The first hiker has to blaze her own trail. But over subsequent trips a trail gets worn in to the ground and more and more hikers will take that trail. The more hikers that take the trail the clearer it becomes and the more likely that future hikers will take it. It takes much more energy to go off the trail. Our brains work the same way, there is a need to conserve energy. Our brains use about 25% of the body’s total energy so the brain is going to default to the neural circuits that take less energy.
So it’s important to determine whether we are ruminating or problem solving. If the thinking does not lead to a course of action within a reasonable period it is probably rumination.
Back to my story above, the first few minutes while I thought about the situation and came up with a plan of action was useful self- reflection and problem solving. Everything after that was useless rumination.
in our interview with Dan Harris he talks about the difference between useless rumination and what he calls constructive anguish . The question he asks himself is “Is this useful?” If it doesn’t lead to meaningful effective action then it is useless rumination.
If we are ruminating the most important thing is to come to a hard stop. As soon as the ruminative thought begins – that one that doesn’t lead to new insights but is the same path – you immediately have to distract yourself with something that requires concentration. The key at this point is to stop the cycle. We have to stop the brain cold, we need to stay off the path. So anything that distracts us and requires concentration will work. Play a game, solve a puzzle, anything is better than the rumination.
So a quick summary, brooding is the process of playing negative thoughts and emotions over and over. It is also extremely destructive. It is a key indicator of depression, anxiety, high blood pressure and heat disease. We need to interrupt the brooding as soon as it begins. The best way to do this is to immediately switch the brain to something that requires concentration.
Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:
Kino MacGregor
Strand of Oaks
Mike Scott of the Waterboys
Todd Henry- author of Die Empty
Randy Scott Hyde

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Episoder(942)

What If and Why Not? A Mantra for Living with Curiosity and Courage with Bobbi Brown

What If and Why Not? A Mantra for Living with Curiosity and Courage with Bobbi Brown

In this episode, Bobbi Brown explores the questions “What if?” and “Why not?”—her mantra for living with curiosity and courage. Renowned makeup artist, entrepreneur, and founder of Jones Road, Bobbi shares how choosing decency over drama and normalcy over fabulosity shaped both her career and her life. She talks about the power of kindness, the myth of “always-on” authenticity, and how the outside—our clothes, lighting, and even a touch of makeup—can support the inside without replacing it. The conversation also delves into bio-individuality in health, the art of reinvention, and why making small choices, day by day, adds up to resilience and joy.We need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it’s a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You!Key Takeaways:Bobbi’s life and career journey as a makeup artist and entrepreneur.The importance of kindness and authenticity in personal and professional life.The concept of normalcy versus fabulosity and its impact on self-acceptance.Bobbi’s approach to makeup, focusing on enhancing natural beauty rather than drastic changes.Transition from the beauty industry to becoming a functional health coach and the idea of bio-individuality in health and diet.The significance of flexibility and self-compassion in health and lifestyle choices.The role of naivety in fostering creativity and resilience in pursuing new ideas.The emotional complexities of leaving a successful business and navigating new beginnings.The influence of family dynamics and personal history on self-identity and growth.The pursuit of joy and authenticity in life, including personal interests and passions.If you enjoyed this conversation with Bobbi Brown, check out these other episodes:From Toxic Perfection to Honest Care: Boundaries, Healing, and Wholeness with Sophia BushLiving Skillfully with Gretchen RubinFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by:NOCD If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/FEEDGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

23 Sep 46min

Why Good Relationships Are the Key to Living a Long and Happy Life with Robert Waldinger

Why Good Relationships Are the Key to Living a Long and Happy Life with Robert Waldinger

In this episode, Dr. Robert Waldinger explores why good relationships are the key to living a long and happy life. Drawing from more than 85 years of research, Robert shares why deep, supportive relationships are stronger predictors of health and happiness than wealth, success, or status. He also explains how relationships regulate stress, why loneliness can be as harmful as smoking, and how we can proactively cultivate social fitness. Listeners will walk away with practical ways to strengthen existing relationships, build new ones, and approach connection as an essential practice for well-being.We need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it’s a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You!Key Takeaways:The significance of relationships for health and happiness.Insights from the Harvard Study of Adult Development on what constitutes a good life.The complexities and challenges of living well despite societal pressures.The impact of loneliness and social isolation on physical and mental health.The critique of cultural messages equating happiness with material success.The importance of self-acceptance and acknowledging both positive and negative aspects of oneself.Strategies for nurturing and maintaining meaningful relationships.The role of curiosity in enhancing social connections and overcoming discomfort.The intersection of scientific research and Zen practice in understanding human well-being.The concept of “social fitness” and the ongoing effort required to cultivate relationships.If you enjoyed this conversation with Robert Waldinger, check out these other episodes:The Midlife Makeover: Redefining Success and Happiness After 40 with Chip ConleyThe Happiness Formula: Using Your Body to Transform Your Mind with Janice KaplanFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by:NOCD If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/FEEDGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

19 Sep 1h

Unlocking the Secrets to Better Sleep: What You Need to Know with Diane Macedo

Unlocking the Secrets to Better Sleep: What You Need to Know with Diane Macedo

In this episode, Diane Macedo unlocks the secrets to better sleep as she shares what you need to know. From her personal experiences with sleep challenges, she shares something counterintuitive: how sleep isn't something we do, it's something that happens when we stop trying so hard. Diane talks about retraining a wired brain and the systems that actually govern sleep. This episode is packed with helpful strategies to improve your sleep.We need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it's a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You! Key Takeaways:Discussion of common sleep problems, including insomnia and restless leg syndrome.Exploration of the psychological impact of stress on sleep quality.Overview of the two systems governing sleep: homeostatic sleep drive and circadian rhythm.Personal experiences and struggles with sleep from the guest.Practical advice for improving sleep quality, including writing down worries and actionable steps.Introduction of the concept of a "reverse curfew" to enhance sleep drive.Examination of the effects of food and diet on sleep, including the role of carbohydrates and melatonin.Insights into various sleep disorders, such as sleep apnea and narcolepsy.Strategies for managing circadian rhythm issues, including light exposure and consistent meal schedules.Discussion of sleep inertia and the myth surrounding waking up fully refreshed.If you enjoyed this conversation with Diane Macedo, check out these other episodes:How to Eat for Better Mental Health with Dr. Drew RamseyUnderstanding Choice Points for Lasting Changes in Eating and Exercise with Michelle SegarFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by:NOCD If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started: https://learn.nocd.com/FEEDGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

16 Sep 1h 1min

From Toxic Perfection to Honest Care: Boundaries, Healing, and Wholeness with Sophia Bush

From Toxic Perfection to Honest Care: Boundaries, Healing, and Wholeness with Sophia Bush

In this episode, Sophia Bush discusses the complexities of human nature, spirituality, and emotional maturity. She explores the dangers of toxic positivity and the challenges of authenticity in public life. Sophia also reflects on intergenerational trauma, activism, and the importance of self-compassion. Through candid stories and practical insights, Sophia encourages listeners to embrace vulnerability, nurture the “good wolf” within, and take small, meaningful actions toward personal and collective healing.We need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it’s a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You!Key Takeaways:The parable of the two wolves and its symbolism regarding internal emotional struggles.The importance of embracing both positive and negative emotions, avoiding toxic positivity.The challenges of maintaining authenticity and boundaries in a public life.The concept of spirituality as a connection to nature and the critique of organized religion.The impact of intergenerational trauma and the shared legacy of harm and healing.The evolution of human societies beyond tribalism and the complexities of historical progress.The significance of self-narratives and affirmations in shaping emotional well-being.The role of external validation and trusted feedback in countering negative self-perceptions.The universal nature of fear, self-doubt, and the importance of self-compassion.The call for collective action and the need for sustained effort in addressing social injustices.If you enjoyed this conversation with Sophia Bush, check out these other episodes:Being Heart Minded with Sarah BlondinLiving Skillfully with Gretchen RubinFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

12 Sep 54min

Slow Productivity: How to Do Less, Focus More, and Not Burn Out with Cal Newport

Slow Productivity: How to Do Less, Focus More, and Not Burn Out with Cal Newport

In this episode, Cal Newport explains slow productivity and how to do less, focus more, and not burn out. Cal argues, our obsession with busyness is pseudo-productivity and while it may look like progress, it isn’t. In his new book, Slow Productivity, he shows how we can accomplish more by doing less with focus and intentWe need your help! We all know ads are part of the podcast world, and we want to improve this experience for you. Please take 2 minutes and complete this survey, it's a quick and easy way to support this podcast. Thank You! Key Takeaways:The impact of technology on productivity and focus.The struggle between distraction and meaningful work in the digital age.The moral implications of smartphone use, particularly among children.The distinction between deep work and shallow busyness.The concept of “slow productivity” as an alternative to traditional productivity metrics.The challenges of measuring productivity in knowledge work.The importance of quality over quantity in work output.Strategies for managing workload and reducing distractions.The psychological and evolutionary roots of digital distraction.Balancing ambition with practicality in creative work to avoid perfectionism.If you enjoyed this conversation with Cal Newport, check out these other episodes:How to Find Focus and Master Attention with Dr. Amishi JhaDigital Minimalism with Cal NewportFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramGrow Therapy - Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Sessions average about $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0, depending on their plan. (Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plans. Visit growtherapy.com/feed today!Persona Nutrition delivers science-backed, personalized vitamin packs that make daily wellness simple and convenient. In just minutes, you get a plan tailored to your health goals. No clutter, no guesswork. Just grab-and-go packs designed by experts. Go to PersonaNutrition.com/FEED today to take the free assessment and get your personalized daily vitamin packs for an exclusive offer — get 40% off your first order.BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

9 Sep 1h 4min

Embracing the Full Spectrum of Emotions: A Guide to Mindfulness and Self-Discovery with Tara Brach

Embracing the Full Spectrum of Emotions: A Guide to Mindfulness and Self-Discovery with Tara Brach

In this episode, Tara Brach explores embracing the full spectrum of emotions, providing a guide to mindfulness and self-discovery. She helps us experiment with a variety of approaches that are guided by a simple compass intention. Tara also discusses stepping out of a trance, the tight story of what’s wrong with me or what’s wrong here, and in the direct experience, where kindness and awareness can flourish. If you’re ready for practical ways to be here, not perfectly, but more fully, this episode is for you.Key Takeaways:Meditation and mindfulness practicesEmotional awareness and self-compassionChallenges in meditation and dealing with difficult emotionsThe metaphor of the two wolves representing good and bad aspects of ourselvesBalancing acknowledgment of difficult emotions with cultivating gratitude and joyThe impact of trauma on meditation practice and presenceThe importance of intention in meditation and personal growthStrategies for overcoming feelings of numbness and depressionThe concept of “trance” and its effect on perception and sufferingUniversal practices for awakening: awareness and compassionIf you enjoyed this conversation with Tara Brach, check out these other episodesThe Path of Aliveness: Exploring Mindfulness and Awakening with Christian DilloInner Freedom Through Mindfulness with Jack KornfieldFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by AG1. Your daily health drink just got more flavorful! Our listeners will get a FREE Welcome Kit worth $76 when you subscribe, including 5 AG1 Travel Packs, a shaker, canister, and scoop! Get started today!BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

5 Sep 45min

The Hidden Costs of Technology and Our Search for Selfhood with Vauhini Vara

The Hidden Costs of Technology and Our Search for Selfhood with Vauhini Vara

In this episode, Vauhini Vara discusses the hidden costs of technology and our search for selfhood. She explains how we live in a world where technology functions as both a lifeline and a trap—offering connection, convenience, and possibility while also shaping our choices, exploiting our attention, and redefining how we see ourselves. Together, Eric and Vauhini explore the tension of relying on tools we can’t seem to live without, the subtle ways algorithms alter our communication, and what it means to hold onto authentic selfhood in the digital age.Feeling overwhelmed, even by the good things in your life? Check out Overwhelm is Optional — a 4-week email course that helps you feel calmer and more grounded without needing to do less. In under 10 minutes a day, you’ll learn simple mindset shifts (called “Still Points”) you can use right inside the life you already have. Sign up here for only $29!Key Takeaways:Exploration of the dual nature of technology as both beneficial and exploitative.Discussion on the impact of major tech companies like Amazon, Google, and OpenAI on personal identity and society.Examination of the ethical implications of consumer choices in a global capitalist system.Reflection on how technology alters human communication and relationships.Analysis of the concept of "algorithmic gaze" and its effects on self-perception and identity.Personal narratives intertwining technology with experiences of grief and loss.Consideration of AI's role in creative processes and its limitations compared to human expression.Discussion on the commodification of identity in the age of social media and audience capture.Insights into the ongoing negotiation between convenience and ethical considerations in technology use.Emphasis on the importance of individual agency and conscious decision-making in navigating the digital age.If you enjoyed this conversation with Vauhini Vara, check out these other episodesDistracted or Empowered? Rethinking Our Relationship with Technology with Pete EtchellsCan Radical Hope Save Us from Despair in a Fractured World? with Jamie WhealHuman Nature and Hope with Rutger BregmanFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramThis episode is sponsored by AG1. Your daily health drink just got more flavorful! Our listeners will get a FREE Welcome Kit worth $76 when you subscribe, including 5 AG1 Travel Packs, a shaker, canister, and scoop! Get started today!BAU, Artist at War opens September 26. Visit BAUmovie.com to watch the trailer and learn more—or sign up your organization for a group screening.LinkedIn: Post your job for free at linkedin.com/1youfeed. Terms and conditions apply.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

2 Sep 57min

Why Chasing Goodness Keeps Us Stuck with Elise Loehnen

Why Chasing Goodness Keeps Us Stuck with Elise Loehnen

In this episode, Elise Loehnen explains why chasing goodness keeps us stuck and how to choose wholeness instead. For so many of us, the drive to be “good” shapes how we show up – as friends, partners, coworkers, even in how we speak to ourselves on hard days. But what does it cost us to live that way? Elise invites us to see that the real challenge isn’t to feed only the good wolf, but to become a whole wolf; one who integrates all parts of ourselves, even the ones we’d rather hide. She explores the hidden price of goodness, the surprising usefulness of envy, the roles we unconsciously inherit, and the stories that keep us small. This conversation will help you rethink what wholeness means and how embracing it can lead to a more authentic, empowered life.Discover the six hidden saboteurs that quietly derail your best intentions—like autopilot behavior, self-doubt, and emotional escape. Download our free guide to uncover what’s getting in your way and learn simple strategies to take back control. Get it now at oneyoufeed.net/ebook.Key Takeaways:Exploration of inner conflict and personal growth.Discussion of the concept of wholeness versus goodness.Examination of the parable of the two wolves and its implications for self-identity.Reframing the seven deadly sins as energies rather than moral failings.Identification of common obstacles to personal growth, such as self-doubt and emotional escapism.Introduction of practical tools for recognizing and transforming personal narratives.Importance of setting boundaries and learning to say no.The role of envy as a complex emotion and its potential for self-discovery.Discussion of the influence of cultural narratives on personal desires and behaviors.Emphasis on flexibility in self-understanding and the ongoing journey of personal integration.If you enjoyed this conversation with Elise Loehnen, check out these other episodesMimetic Desires in Everyday Life with Luke BurgisHow to Embrace the Wisdom of the Women Mystics with Mirabai StarrFor full show notes, click here!Connect with the show:Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPodSubscribe on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyFollow us on InstagramSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

29 Aug 1h 13min

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