Preparing Now for Future Puberty and Masturbation Questions Megan Michelson and Mary Flo Ridley Ep 243

Preparing Now for Future Puberty and Masturbation Questions Megan Michelson and Mary Flo Ridley Ep 243

Depending on your personal background with puberty, sex and the often avoided topic of masturbation, having open conversations with your kids on these topics may feel daunting.

You may want to avoid it or get “the talk” over and done with as quickly as possible. Or maybe your kids are really young and you don’t want to think about it right now. My guests Mary Flo Ridley and Megan Michelson walk us through why starting early talking with our kids about body awareness and establishing our family story about sex is so important.

“What we're trying to get rid of is this idea that this is a one-time conversation in parenting. The world that we are raising our kids in has changed so drastically that the way we as parents talk about sex has to change drastically as well. We can have multiple age appropriate conversations and a little-by-little approach where we establish a conversation pattern where we are the loving authority in our child's life on this topic.”

They have great book recommendations and advice on talking with your pediatrician so you know when puberty is imminent for each child. We cover ways to pursue conversations with your kids and how to talk to them calmly without overreacting.

Finally, we dive into the deeper waters of talking to your older children about masturbation, dealing with our emotional baggage when it comes to sex and how to strike the difficult balance of teaching what is normal and beneficial.

“We're hearing from a lot of youth ministers and pastors that work with college kids that this is an epidemic of a great addiction. So there needs to be more of a warning of how this is normal, but not beneficial. That why it's such a difficult topic. You can say, yes, honey, this is absolutely normal. You're learning about your body and how it works, but it can become a habit of comfort. And if this is where you go when you're upset or when you're angry, if this is how you comfort yourself, then this is not beneficial to you in your future.”

Episoder(500)

The Power of Pausing:: Kirsten Watson [Ep 364]

The Power of Pausing:: Kirsten Watson [Ep 364]

Do you remember commercial breaks? They were built-in pauses, breaks from the drama or sitcom. With DVR’s or streaming services we can easily skip or minimize the pauses. But what if “pause” is what your everyday really needs? Not a week-long, pick your favorite vacation spot pause, but a quick moment to stop and say, “God, where are you leading? What are you saying?” or “Help me today because I don’t have what it takes to make it through the day.”   Kirsten Watson is a busy woman - a wife, a mom to seven, an author and podcast host - but all those responsibilities only lead her to pause more. Whether it’s in the moments just after her alarm goes off, or in the middle of after-school stories, she challenges us to slow down and first ask God for the help we need, and then to see where he is at work. She encourages us to practice discernment for what is most helpful in our kids’ sanctification - either stepping in or stepping back. She invites us to tap into the power of the Holy Spirit available to us if we will only ask.  Kirsten’s book, Sis, Take a Breath: Encouragement for the Woman Who’s Trying to Live and Love Well (but Secretly Just Wants to Take a Nap), releases May 3, 2022.   Connect with Kirsten Watson:  Website:  https://thewatsonseven.com/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kirstenwatsonofficial  Instagram:  @_kirstenwatson_ Podcast: Why or Why Not with the Watsons   Links Mentioned:    Sis, Take a Breath: Encouragement For the Woman Who’s Trying to Live and Love Well (but Secretly Just Wants to take a Nap)  by Kirsten Watson   Related Episodes: Talk to Your Kids About Race :: Kirsten Watson [Ep 314] Wild and Free :: Hayley Morgan [Ep 118] Breathe…{replacing “me” with “He”series} Blogpost  Featured Sponsors:  Ana Luisa. Make Mom's Day and treat her to new jewelry pieces with Ana Luisa's Buy One, Get One 40% OFF sale! One piece for her, and one piece for you at  shop.analuisa.com/alone. StitchFix. Sign up today at StitchFix.com/DMA and get $20 off your first purchase. StoryWorth. Save $10 on your first purchase for a limited time at StoryWorth.com/DMA.

25 Apr 202241min

Gentle Christ-Centered Parenting :: David and Amanda Erickson [Ep 363]

Gentle Christ-Centered Parenting :: David and Amanda Erickson [Ep 363]

“Peaceful” and “parenting” aren’t words we usually put together. Think about the parenting moments that stick out to you from the last week – was there anything peaceful about them? What if there could be? What would it change for you if parenting didn’t feel like moving from one fight to another? My guests this week, Dr David and Amanda Erickson of Flourishing Homes and Families, encourage us that it IS possible. Peace and grace can be meaningful parts of your parenting – not only for your kids, but for you. The gospel always brings freedom. Gentle Christ-Centered Parenting will not only change the dynamic of your house, but it will set your kids up for success in the hardest parts of life – responding with grace when someone hurts them, learning to hold boundaries and communicate their needs in a way that still respects the dignity and honor of the person who hurts them or crosses those boundaries and how to collaboratively problem solve. Ultimately, there is no better place for them to see reliance on the Holy Spirit’s work in life than through us fighting against sin by his power in our own lives. David and Amanda have fostered children and are raising two biological kids. They too have had to work against the patterns of their own childhoods to transform their parenting.  Connect with David and Amanda Erickson:  Website:  https://flourishinghomesandfamilies.com/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/flourishinghomesandfamilies  Instagram:  @flourishinghomesandfamilies TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@flourishinghomesfamilies  Links Mentioned:   Instagram Stories on “the rod” verses  Good and Angry: Exchanging Frustration for Character in You and Your Kids! By Scott Turanksy and Joanne Miller   Related Episodes: Connected Relationships (LIVE Event) :: Jim & Lynne Jackson [Ep222] How to Avoid Power Struggles :: Stacy Bellward & Chad Hyenga [Ep 292] Grace According to Our Needs :: Beth Moore [Ep 270] The Mom Game Changer :: Kat Lee [Ep 41] Featured Sponsors:  Caraway–Visit carawayhomore.com/DMA to get 10% off your next purchase. Nontoxic cookware made modern. Hello Fresh-Go to HelloFresh.com/dma16  for up to 16 free meals and 3 free gifts. Peloton-Visit onepeloton.com to learn more.

18 Apr 202254min

Walking Through Seasons of Unbelonging :: Shauna Niequist [Ep 362]

Walking Through Seasons of Unbelonging :: Shauna Niequist [Ep 362]

We all walk through seasons of transition, whether we leave something behind by choice or it was chosen for us. Life after a disruptive event or during life transitions can feel like “starting over” just as much as a move clear across the country. You may be asking the question, “who am I here?” even in familiar places and routines. Author Shauna Niequist encourages us in what to hold on to and what to let go of, through seasons of loss.  She equips us with three tools for the journey - curiosity, self-compassion, and courage. We discuss how prayer can tenderize an angry heart, and Shauna shares how hanging on to writing and hospitality, even when they felt like impossible disciplines, helped her journey forward through grief and change. Shauna Niequist is a wife, mom, and author to numerous books including, Present Over Perfect, Cold Tangerines, and Bread and Wine. Her new book, I Guess I Haven’t Learned that Yet, releases on April 12, 2022   Connect with Shauna Niequist:  Website:  https://www.shaunaniequist.com  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sniequist  Instagram:  @sniequist  Twitter: @sniequist  Links Mentioned:   I Guess I Haven’t Learnd that Yet by Shauna Niequist   Related Episodes: Soulful over Frantic :: Shauna Niequist [Ep 127] How to Get Real and Savor More :: Shauna Niequist [Ep 65] When Moms Walk Through Grief :: Stacey Thacker [Ep 76] Quiet Your Inner Critic and Practice Self-Compassion :: Kim Frederickson [Ep 188] Recovering from Mom Burnout :: Nicole Zasowski [Ep 357] Featured Sponsors:  Rothy’s. Step up your shoes and accessories this Spring and get $20 off your first purchase at rothys.com/DMA. The Biggest Story Bible Storybook by Crossway and Kevin DeYoung. Pick up a copy wherever books are sold or visit crossway.org/plus to find out how to save 30%. Athena Club. Show your skin you care with the Athena Club Razor Kit! Get 20% off your first order at AthlenaClub.com with promo code DMA.

11 Apr 202247min

Mom, You Are Important but Not Essential, and That’s Good News :: Brittany Turner [Ep 361]

Mom, You Are Important but Not Essential, and That’s Good News :: Brittany Turner [Ep 361]

As moms we do carry a big burden – we have a God-give responsibility to love and care for our children, but how often do you feel crushed under that burden? It’s hard to do all the tasks to take care of everyone – especially if you’re measuring yourself by how many meltdowns (your kids or yours) did or didn’t happen this week. What if that responsibility came with the freedom to not hold it all together? What if there were someone more loving and more powerful than you to shape all the details of life for the good of everyone involved? This week, Brittany Turner encourages us that the same God we trust to take all the hard in our lives and turn it into good is God for our kids too! We can rest in his capabilities and invite others into our lives to help carry the load. You do not have to mom alone!  Brittany Turner is a wife, mom of four, speaker, and writer who loves to help people take what they say they believe and put it into practice in their everyday lives.   Connect with Brittany Turner:  Website:  https://brittanyjturner.com/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/iambrittanyjturner  Instagram:  @iambrittanyjturner YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPGJooyyxRuC4iM5Th1tC8w?view_as=subscriber    Links Mentioned:   Mary Van Geffen–Parent Coach for Spicy Ones  Body Awareness in Parenting :: Mary Van Geffen [Ep 333]  NYTimes Article “Harsh Realm of Gentle Parenting”   Related Episodes: Postpartum Depression :: Brittany Turner [Ep 277] Sunday Planning :: Retha Nichole [Ep 349] Encouraging the Exhausted Mom :: Summer of Mentorship Week 5 When You Carry the Burden of Perfection :: Aubrie Norman [Ep 284] Featured Sponsors:  Stitch Fix Get started today by filling out your FREE style quiz and advantage of free shipping and returns. StichFix.com/DMA The Biggest Story Bible Storybook by Crossway and Kevin DeYoung. Pick up a copy wherever books are sold or visit crossway.org/plus to find out how to save 30%. Simply Be Box Use Code DMASpring10 to receive $10 off Your Subscription or Spring Box Purchase at SimplyBeBox.com

4 Apr 202235min

Creating Digital Safe Spaces :: Chris McKenna [Ep 360]

Creating Digital Safe Spaces :: Chris McKenna [Ep 360]

Does keeping your kids safe on the internet ever feel like a game of Whack-a-mole - frenzied and unending, always trying to fend off the threats that pop up? Or maybe you’ve been afraid your kids would be or feel left out if you had more limits on their screens? You’ve seen the documentaries and the research of how addictive social media can be and the average age in which kids are exposed to pornography keeps going down and yet, we know on some level what we forbid our kids to do has the potential to become the only thing they want. Families around you probably have a wide range of tech norms in their households. Kids relentlessly request screen time. Honestly, sometimes we long for the quiet of a kid mesmerized by a screen.  What’s a mom to do?  Enter this week’s guest, Chris McKenna, dad of four and founder of Protect Young Eyes, an organization devoted to helping parents create safe digital spaces for their kids. Chris encourages us that while there are real things our kids need protecting from on the internet, there are real ways we can foster digital trust and create safe digital spaces for our kids. Chris helps us understand that rather than a controller, our kids want a coach - someone to teach them how to use technology in ways that honor God, themselves, and others.    Connect with Chris McKenna & Protect Young Eyes:  Website:  https://protectyoungeyes.com/  Twitter @protecteyes  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/protectyoungeyes/  Instagram:  @Protect Young Eyes  Protect Young Eyes App - iPhone  Protect Young Eyes App - Android   Links Mentioned:    Birds and Bees - Mary Flo Ridley - tools for talking to your kids about sex Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr. by Kristen A. Jenson https://www.amazon.com/Good-Pictures-Bad-Jr-Protect/dp/0997318724  Protect Young Eyes TheUltimate Guide to Understanding Routers blog post  Gryphon Router Digital Trust Download Related Episodes: Let’s Talk about Sex :: Mary Flo Ridley and Megan Michelson [Ep 328] Porn-Proofing Our Kids :: Kristen Jenson [Ep 256] Parenting in the Digital Age :: Ashley Januszewski [Ep 207] Time & Space for Flourishing :: Andy Crouch [Ep 208] The Screen Struggle is Real :: Arlene Pellicane [Ep 331] Featured Sponsors:  Thrive Market. Join today to get 40% off your first order AND a FREE gift worth over $50! Join at ThriveMarket.com/DMA StitchFix. Get started today by filling out your free style quiz at StitchFitx.com/DMA  and take advantage of free shipping and returns. The Biggest Story Bible Storybook by Crossway and Kevin DeYoung. Pick up a copy wherever books are sold or visit crossway.org/plus to find out how to save 30%.

28 Mar 202252min

How to Help a Friend Process Life  [Ep 359]

How to Help a Friend Process Life [Ep 359]

How do you respond when a difficult situation comes your way? One that feels out of the blue, or that doesn’t have a clear solution, or all the solutions you’ve tried haven’t worked?  In this birthday episode (Happy Birthday Heather!) join Heather and DMA team member, Stephanie Snow, as they talk through what it looks like to process through all those thoughts that circle around our brains as we deal with the difficult stuff of life. We talk about not only how to sort out your own thoughts, but how to come alongside friends, family, and even your children to listen well and ask good questions.  Links Mentioned:    Relational Needs Card–Townsend Institute  Related Episodes: Bruce Learns to Label His Feelings [Ep 316] Recovery for Life :: Lynn Hoffman [Ep 129]  Featured Sponsors:  Caraway Home. Get 10% off this great line of non-toxic cookware made modern at CarawayHome.com/DMA. Use DMA at checkout for 10% off. HelloFresh: Go to HelloFresh.com/dma16 use the code: dma16 to get 16 free meals AND a free gift. Stitch Fix– Receive 25% off when you keep everything in your Kids Fix at www.stitchfix.com/DMA

21 Mar 202246min

Mentoring with Lisa Bevere [Ep 358]

Mentoring with Lisa Bevere [Ep 358]

Have you ever wished for a fairy godmother? Someone to wave a wand and make your troubles disappear? The next best thing just might be a real godmother - a woman to see you in your distress and to offer help and encouragement. What’s hard for you in this season of motherhood? Your reactions to your kids? Seeing how your kids react to one another? Maybe you need to break free from life centering around your kids.  In this mentoring episode we take a proverbial walk with author and speaker Lisa Bevere through anger, growth, idolatry, guilt and hope in the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives and sibling rivalry. Her most recent book, Godmothers: Why You Need One. How to Be One encourages women to live with and for one another and to ask for help from those who have gone before you - which she graciously does with us in this episode! Lisa and her husband John raised four boys and she has written numerous books on womanhood, identity, anger, and much more.  Connect with Lisa Bevere:  Website:  https://lisabevere.com/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisabevere.page  Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/lisabevere/  Links Mentioned:    Godmothers: Why You Need One. How to Be One by Lisa Bevere   Related Episodes: Focus on Growth vs Guilt :: Lisa Bevere [Ep 291] Centering Truth :: Lisa Bevere [Ep 204] Anger Management, Hollywood, & Sacrificial Faith :: Amber Lia [Ep 75] Featured Sponsors:  Rothy’s. Step up your shoes and accessories this spring and get $20 off your first purchase at rothys.com/DMA. Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it. Go to Prose.com/DMA for your FREE in-depth hair consultation and 15% off. Athena Club Razor Kit! Show your skin you care, sign up today and you’ll get 20% off your first order at AthenaClub.com and use promo code dma for 20% off.

14 Mar 202256min

Recovering from Mom Burnout :: Nicole Zasowski [Ep 357]

Recovering from Mom Burnout :: Nicole Zasowski [Ep 357]

Every mom will experience burnout. It’s as simple as our energy output exceeds our energy input, but it can be debilitating and discouraging. You may wish for a vacation, or spa day or even just 15 minutes of silence, but what if those typical self-care strategies are out of your reach? Where can you find rest when it seems like your circumstances just don’t allow for any?  “You may find that if someone pours water all over you, you are damp and distracted, but not cured of your sadness, the way a fire department can douse a fire but never recover what has been burnt down.” —Lemony Snicket, The Bad Beginning This week we talk with Nicole Zasowski, a mom of three, therapist, and author of the new book, What if it’s Wonderful? Through her own life journey that has included deep sorrow and deep joy, Nicole encourages us to fight burnout with regular rhythms of celebration. No, not another party for you to plan, she’s not looking to douse water on burned-out you, but to help you recover joy that has been lost.  She gives you an invitation to look at the good God is doing all around you, in every season.  Connect with Nicole Zasowski:  Website:  https://www.nicolezasowski.com/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nicolezasowskiwriter  Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/nicolezasowski/  Links Mentioned:   Pre-Order What if it’s Wonderful?  Related Episodes: The Gift of Celebrating Biblical Feasts :: Amber Lee [Ep 217]  Not Alone in Overwhelm :: Kay Wyma Sunday Planning :: Retha Nichole [Ep 349]  Featured Sponsors:  Stitch Fix– Receive 25% off when you keep everything in your Kids Fix at www.stitchfix.com/DMA Thrive Causemetics–Get 15% off your first order when you visit www.thrivecausemetics.com/DMA Indeed– Receive a $75 credit to upgrade your job post at www.indeed.com/DMA

7 Mar 202250min

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