Connected Relationships Jim Lynne Jackson Ep 222

Connected Relationships Jim Lynne Jackson Ep 222

For day two of Don’t Mom Alone Live, Jim and Lynne Jackson are back to talk all about relationships and answer listener questions.

If you’ve ever felt like a bad parent because of your child’s disobedience or struggle to referee the sibling arguments and fights in your home, this episode is for you! The Jackson’s share their Peace process and how to be confident before God in how you are parenting.

It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon. So we need to have confidence in our ability to be peaceful and not let this child’s behavior define me or tell me that I’m a bad parent. And have the long-term view that God can do anything in a child’s life as I persevere in encouraging and teaching and training.

They share great practicals for blended families and for how to navigate parenting when you and your spouse or co-parent aren’t on the same page. We also dive into teaching your children empathy and social cues as a way to foster great friendships.

In the end, our goal can be to equip our kids to be conduits of God’s grace to the world both through their relationships with others, but it starts with their relationship with us.

When I thought about that the kind of relationships in life that Jesus bought for our kids on the cross, not just with each other but whatever relationships they’d have. I just had this image of “trickle down grace” starting from the cross and just trickling down through us to our kids and then out to the world and our kids. We can grow to become profound dispensers of grace in life to others.

What we chat about:
  • Getting feedback about our kids that makes you feel like a “bad parent”
  • Keeping the long-view when you are training your children
  • There is a dramatic increase in anxiety and depression in children, teens and young adults. It is five to eight times greater than it was 50 years ago.
  • What to do when you and your spouse aren’t on the same page with parenting
  • Ask penetrating questions when your spouse is struggling to parent in kindness.
  • “What are you hoping our kids will learn right now?”
  • Blended family dynamics and how to co-parent well
  • You are building trust with your kids and when you are confident before God in how you are parenting, you can be at peace with how someone else is parenting
  • Ask kids: What do you want to tell me about how you’re feeling and how your time went?
  • Sibling rivalry and how conflict is an opportunity to teach our children how to reconcile
  • The Peace Process the Jackson’s teach: Calm > Understand > Solve > Celebrate
  • Celebrating that your kids reconciled is an important step to future success
  • When your kids feel encouraged and successful when working through conflict, you can see the momentum begin to change
  • Learning empathy as a family and equipping your kids to be more successful in friendship
  • Quick connects with individually with your kids can be more effective than playing with them for longer periods. Find ways to show that you delight in who they are!
  • Use mission trips and giving back to the community as your vacation/connection time as a family
Links Mentioned:

Episoder(500)

Week Two Summer of Mentorship 2020 :: Dorena Williamson

Week Two Summer of Mentorship 2020 :: Dorena Williamson

Many of us avoid and struggle with conversations about race or disabilities because it’s uncomfortable. When our children ask innocent questions about someone who is different than they are, it can make us feel tongue tied or embarrassed. Author Dorena Williamson has created some lovely children’s books to help parents respond and invite their children to join them on the journey of learning to love and speak worth over every person that God created. And I kept feeling frustrated thinking that’s not the solution to teach your children to be colorblind because that’s minimizing the beauty of God’s handiwork. And as Christians we should be the biggest proponents of celebrating the beauty of our racial diversity and not minimizing it or sort of washing it away and this colorblind land. She shares powerfully about how to engage with your children about racial and cultural differences and how we can model what it looks like to grow in the area of loving and accepting people who are different than us. As our children get older, I think that these are valuable conversations to have with them because the beauty of it is that it tells your children you are teachable and that you don’t get it right all the time and that you’re continuing to learn and grow. What we chat about: All about Dorena’s family and their multiracial church, Strong Tower Bible Church Her book ColorFull and the background behind why she wrote it The creativity of God and how he uses color in all that he created Looking for opportunities to share the beauty of racial differences with our children Language for parents to use to help teach children and avoid shaming Reinforcing the idea that “Different is not bad” and calling out the worth of people Why equipping kids early is important Modeling how we are all growing when it comes to loving and accepting people who are different than us Encouraging our children to ask questions even when they are uncomfortable Engaging with our kids about other cultures whether we can travel internationally or experience cultures in our own cities Connect with Dorena: Links Mentioned: ColorFull: Celebrating the Colors God Gave Us** ThoughtFull : Discovering the Unique Gifts in Each of Us** GraceFull : Growing a Heart that Cares for Our Neighbors** Other books/sites that Dorena recommends:  Brownicity.com site with helpful resources (created by a Godly woman Dr. Lucretia Berry) The Beatitudes by Carole Boston Weatherford The Other Side  by Jacqueline Woodson Beabridgebuilder.com A list of 28 picture books (aren’t about boycotts, buses or basketball)  –listed created by ScottWood

13 Jul 202048min

Week One Summer of Mentorship 2020 :: Rachel Anne Ridge

Week One Summer of Mentorship 2020 :: Rachel Anne Ridge

Rachel Anne Ridge is an author, professional artist, and speaker in Texas. Together with her husband Tom, she bootstrapped her way through the Great Recession, raised a family, and rediscovered her purpose in the midst of the everyday juggle of life. Her books, Flash, The Homeless Donkey Who Taught Me About Life, Faith, and Second Chances, and Walking with Henry are inspired by the stray donkeys (yes, donkeys) who interrupted her juggling act and revealed how ordinary (and sometimes hilarious) events help us find our higher purposes and deeper faith. Rachel is mom to three adult children and Nana to five littles.   Little did I know when I asked Rachel to be on the podcast, that the day before our interview she wrote a viral blog post encouraging the lonely mom of older kids (click here to read it).   Her honest, yet hopeful words, are what I’m sure caused 37,000 + people on Facebook to like her words. She admits the hard parts but encourages moms to keep their eyes on the bigger purpose. Show Highlights:  Rachel shares personal parenting challenges and what she (and her husband) did to overcome them. Discover a variety of ways to get God-centered (none of which include getting up early). Hear Rachel’s parenting regret and advice on how to avoid it. Be encouraged by Rachel’s greatest parenting strength. For the mom of older children, listen to Rachel’s thoughts on how discipline changes during this stage to a coaching role Most importantly hear the Truth of God’s great love for you and your family. Links:  Growing Kids God’s Way: Biblical Ethics for Parenting* Rachel shares they attended training in this parenting approach. She also alludes to the fact they did not agree with all the information in this program. She shared with me later how attending the course together allowed them to get on the same page and then toss what they couldn’t use. After some research I found parents strongly divided on this training approach. If you are looking for other grace-based parent training, then here are some other resources: Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) by Foster Cline & Jim Fay Heartfelt Discipline by Clay Clarkson Grace-Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman Connect with Rachel: Blog :: Facebook :: Twitter :: Pinterest :: Instagram Featured Sponsor:  Thrive Market  go to https://thrivemarket.com/dma use DMA to get $20 of store credit.

6 Jul 202035min

How to Avoid Power Struggles :: Stacy Bellward and Chad Hayenga [Ep 292]

How to Avoid Power Struggles :: Stacy Bellward and Chad Hayenga [Ep 292]

With more family togetherness than ever before comes the potential for a lot more arguing and nagging our kids to obey. If you’re stuck in a parenting rut or negative cycle, then our friends from Connected Families are here to help.  Stacey Bellward and Chad Hayenga join me to talk about breaking the patterns of defensiveness in our kids and how the power of curious questions can create productive conversations and build wisdom. “I think as we look at scripture and we consider how Jesus approached people, you know, it was surprising to me when I first learned that Jesus asked 307 questions that are recorded in the gospels. And that's a lot of questioning. And we think about Jesus as being a great teacher. Jesus is a great teacher, but he often times uses questions to build wisdom and to hold people accountable.” If you want to go deeper after listening to this show, Connected Families is offering a special promo code for Don’t Mom Alone listeners for their Power of Questions online course. With the code DMA20 it’s just $30.  Connect with Connected Families:  Website: connectedfamilies.org Facebook: facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies Instagram:  @connectedfams   Links Mentioned:   The Power Of Questions Online Course **DMA20 gets you 20% off Heather, Chad and Stacy do a role play of asking questions instead of nagging Past Connected Families Interviews   Featured Sponsor: GoMacro -- check out Macro Bars GoMacro.com . Get 30% off your order with the promo code DMA (free shipping on orders over $60).

29 Jun 202041min

Focus on Growth vs Guilt  :: Lisa Bevere [Ep 291]

Focus on Growth vs Guilt :: Lisa Bevere [Ep 291]

Author and speaker Lisa Bevere is back to give us a powerful message as we head into summer with our kids: “push aside the guilt and celebrate growth.” She shares some personal stories from very hard places in her life as a young mom and how God led her to work through her anger and underlying fears.  “God said to me: ‘Children inherit one of two things, either my promises or your fears.’ And that I needed to face off with these things. I leaned into that process because of my son. Not because of me. I just came to the place where I realized that in my weakness, he is strong. I've watched God take every weak place in my life and inhabit it with his strength.” I’m so thankful for how Lisa takes us into her story and points to God’s faithfulness to heal and restore our brokenness. She also encourages all of us to set aside the unnecessary guilt and heavy expectations we may be carrying in motherhood and to accept God’s mercy which is new every morning.  Connect with Lisa:  Website:  https://messengerinternational.org/lisabevere/ Facebook: facebook.com/lisabevere.page Instagram: @lisabevere Links Mentioned:   Ep 204 Centering Truth :: Lisa Bevere [PODCAST] Strong: Devotions to Live a Powerful and Passionate Life [BOOK] Sponsors: Go Macro -- Save 30% off your order https://www.gomacro.com/ with code: DMA Sun Basket -- Get $35 off your first order sunbasket.com/dma  use promo code: dma

22 Jun 202043min

Build Lasting Faith in Your Kids :: Dr. Kara Powell [Ep 290]

Build Lasting Faith in Your Kids :: Dr. Kara Powell [Ep 290]

From learning to walk to tying their shoes and eventually learning to drive (coming up for me soon!), so much of parenting is teaching, training and encouragement.  When it comes to faith in God, we do all we can to teach our kids about God’s Word and engage kids in church, but research from the Fuller Youth Institute is helping to shine a light on the potential gaps that cause a high number of youth to abandon their faith in college. My guest Dr. Kara Powell shares a number of research findings that can be game changers for our families as we seek to help our kids develop a faith that sticks with them their whole lives, or “sticky faith.” As a mom of three, she talks about how she’s parented differently in light of her research and why now is the perfect time to start making small changes that could make all the difference.   “One of the things that surprised me in our research is that when young people feel close to their parents, they're also more open to what's important to their parents, including their faith. And so it's not just good for our family relationships. It's also good for the long-term trajectory of our kids.” Connect with the Fuller Youth Institute:  Website:  fulleryouthinstitute.org  Facebook: facebook.com/fulleryouthinstitute Instagram: @fulleryouthinstitute  Links Mentioned:   Growing With: Every Parent's Guide to Helping Teenagers and Young Adults Thrive in Their Faith, Family, and Future [BOOK] Resources for building Sticky Faith Sponsor: Text DMA to 303030 to get a free trial of Beachbody On-Demand

15 Jun 202044min

Strengthening Our Friendships :: Susan Seay [Ep 289]

Strengthening Our Friendships :: Susan Seay [Ep 289]

Deep friendships are essential to our lives. Whether we’re extroverted or introverted, have a lot of friends or a few, we all need someone else to walk through life with. I’m excited for you to hear from Susan Seay, a mom of 7 and a mentor to many. She shares some great advice on keeping our friendships strong during life’s challenges. “We're all in the same storm. We're just not all dealing with it in the same way. We don't even have the same viewpoint on just how big this issue is or how small it is. If I need to remember, that's not why I chose them as friends. I didn't choose them because we agree on everything. We're always going to be different and unique and varied. It's our foundation that keeps our relationship strong.” We talk about fighting back against insecurity and comparison which can break down friendships. And we get into how to have a healthy disagreement with a friend and stay close. Susan also shares tips for staying connected with friends and extending grace for misunderstandings and miscommunications that happen in our hyper-connected world.  Connect with Susan:  Website: susanseay.com Facebook: facebook.com/SusanLSeay Instagram: @susanlseay  Links Mentioned:   Ep 52: Focused Instead of Frustrated :: Susan Seay  Mentor 4 Moms Podcast Sponsors:  Thrive Market --become a member risk-free. Go to https://thrivemarket.com/dma get $20 in shopping credit! StoryWorth -- go to http://storyworth.com/dma get $10 off your first purchase

8 Jun 202045min

Working from Home :: Jehava Brown [Ep 288]

Working from Home :: Jehava Brown [Ep 288]

My guest today Jehava Brown takes us into how she started a blog as a side project while staying home with her kids and transitioned that site into a full-time job.  We talk about work/life balance, setting health boundaries and trusting God to be in charge of the things we can’t control.   “I know that God is the one who provides every job and every dime. And so when I can rest in that, I don't feel the pressure to hustle 24 hours a day. I was working sometimes even 60 hours a week, which was just crazy. And most of it was at night, so it wasn't getting good sleep. I realized I'm not willing to live that way. So I really had to trust God to a different level” Jehava is a mom of three boys and she blogs at www.onlygirl4boyz.com. She also shares how she’s connecting with her teenage son differently and some changes she’s made since the quarantine to keep up with housework. Connect with Jehava:  Website: www.onlygirl4boyz.com Facebook: facebook.com/onlygirl4boyz Instagram:  @onlygirl4boyz

1 Jun 202036min

Tough Transitions with Toddlers and Newborns :: Hailey Bain and Meredith Woodruff [Ep 287]

Tough Transitions with Toddlers and Newborns :: Hailey Bain and Meredith Woodruff [Ep 287]

In the past two years, a lot has changed in the lives of my friends Hailey and Meredith. They came on episode 199 to talk about discipline and toddlers. Since that conversation their families have grown and changed.  Today we’re chatting about tough transitions with parenting young kids. Whether it’s a newborn who won’t stop screaming or the anticipation of being outnumbered by a third child, change is hard for both parents and kids.  Hailey and Meredith share how they’ve found hope in God during some difficult situations and how their community of friends have helped them not mom alone.  “They reminded me that God is working in this. He has not left you. He is working in this situation. And that gave me a lot of hope. One specific friend said: You are serving the Lord when you are holding your screaming baby, when you are in there trying to teach her how to go to sleep. That is service to the Lord.”   Links Mentioned:   Discipline & Toddlers :: Hailey Bain & Meredith Woodruff [Ep 199] Meredith shared scripture from Lamentations 3:16-24 Foundations Book by Ruth and Troy Simons ** Meredith's business : Concrete Conversations Hailey's business : Hey Honey Clothing Company and her Facebook Store Sponsors: Sunbasket -- Get $35 off your first order of meals over at Sunbasket.com/dma. Use code DMA. Exploring the Bible Together --Now through May 25, 2020, Don’t Mom Alone listeners can pick up a copy of Exploring the Bible Together along with a selection of ESV children’s Bibles for 40% off with a free Crossway+ membership. For more information, visit  crossway.org/DMA8.

25 Mai 202040min

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