016: Ask David — How can I cope with a complainer? How can I help a loved one who is depressed?

016: Ask David — How can I cope with a complainer? How can I help a loved one who is depressed?

How can you help a depressed friend or family member? You may be surprised to discover that the attempt to "help" is rarely effective, and may even make the problem worse. In contrast, the refusal to help is nearly always helpful. But to understand that paradox, you'll have to give a listen to this fascinating edition of "Ask David!"

David and Fabrice also address a related problem nearly all of us confront from time to time: How do you deal with a friend who is a relentless whiner and complainer? When you try to help them or suggest a solution to the problem, they just say, "That won't work" and keep complaining. You end up feeling frustrated and annoyed, because the other person just won't listen! David and Fabrice illustrate a shockingly easy and incredibly effective solution to this problem.

Finally, David discusses some disturbing recent research indicating that the ability of therapists—as well as friends or family members—to know how suicidal someone is, is extremely poor. David and Fabrice explain how to assess how suicidal someone actually is, and what to do if you discover that he or she really is at risk of a suicide attempt.

Episoder(512)

103: Ask David — Dealing with Intrusive Memories, Is Depression Inherited?

103: Ask David — Dealing with Intrusive Memories, Is Depression Inherited?

Today we answer six questions submitted by listeners like you: Harald: How can I find the Show Notes for the Feeling Good Podcasts? Kristin: How do you help patients who obsess about past traumatic e...

27 Aug 201844min

102: How to Deal With a Suicidal Patient

102: How to Deal With a Suicidal Patient

Suicidal thoughts and urges are very common among depressed patients. The vast majority of depressed individuals have thoughts of suicide from time to time, and some struggle with serious suicidal urg...

20 Aug 201832min

101: Ask David — Therapy Wars: REBT vs. TEAM-CBT

101: Ask David — Therapy Wars: REBT vs. TEAM-CBT

13 Aug 201834min

100: The New Micro-Neurosurgery — A Remarkable Interview with Dr. Mark Noble

100: The New Micro-Neurosurgery — A Remarkable Interview with Dr. Mark Noble

The famed neuroscientist, Dr. Mark Noble, from the University of Rochester, has developed a strong interest in TEAM-CBT and has visited our Tuesday group and Sunday hikes on three occasions this year....

6 Aug 20181h 45min

099: Lisa Nicole Bell Interview — Behind the Brilliance

099: Lisa Nicole Bell Interview — Behind the Brilliance

Lisa Nicole Bell is the host of the highly regarded podcast, Behind the Brilliance. In this lively interview, Nicole and David talk about David's path into the mental health field the difficulties an...

30 Jul 201859min

098: Live Session (Lee) — Methods, Five Secrets (Part 3)

098: Live Session (Lee) — Methods, Five Secrets (Part 3)

David and Jill do M = Methods, and show Lee how to respond to his wife more skillfully, using the Five Secrets of Effective Communication (link). Like everyone who is trying to learn the Five Secrets,...

23 Jul 20181h 25min

097: Live Session (Lee) — Agenda Setting (Part 2)

097: Live Session (Lee) — Agenda Setting (Part 2)

David and Jill do A = (Paradoxical) Agenda Setting with Lee, starting with the Invitation: Jill asks Lee if he wants help with the relationship conflict, and if this would be a good time to roll up ou...

16 Jul 20181h 38min

096: Live Session (Lee) — Testing, Empathy (Part 1)

096: Live Session (Lee) — Testing, Empathy (Part 1)

For the past couple months, Fabrice has asked me to set up a live therapy session to illustrate how to treat troubled relationships using TEAM-CBT. I was fortunate to get an email request from a colle...

9 Jul 20181h 8min

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