20210910 - Include Space

Today I want to share my current understanding of what being a human Being means. In my experience there are two modes of being: Personality or Being. *Personality* This is the ego structure that holds our our coping strategies, reactive patterns and compulsive reactions. It’s built on fear for our survival, of abandonment, rejection, loosing autonomy, etc. At its foundation it is the rejection of Self / Being in favour of something in the outside world. The development of the Personality structure happens automatically during childhood as the outside world rejects our Being again and again in different ways, remember that a child is very sensitive. When we operate in the world from this place we see the world from the eyes of the hurt and fearful child. We live in the past. Other names used in different frameworks: Ego, Mind (as an opposition to spiritual Heart), Jackal mind (non-violent communication), Threat system (from the 3 emotion regulation systems in psychology) How to recognise it: - NO to the present moment - Thinking in terms of Right/Wrong + Good/Bad + Black/White - OR thinking - Judgemental mindset towards oneself or others - A sense of needing to protect oneself - Contraction and tension in the body - A general sense of fear or unease - Obsession with “fixing the problem” through thinking about it - A sense of being trapped inside our experience (thoughts and emotion) - Oriented around passed and future more than the present moment - Feeling stifled by self-awareness - Blocking natural impulses, spontaneous expression and intuitive action - A sense of acting or “not being oneself” - Lack of space and awareness - Believing in or identifying with “The Inner Trojka” = The Inner Critic + Inner Perfectionist + Inner Pusher - Hierarchical thinking - Better than, Worse than - Transactional relating *Being* This is what we long for! Whenever we feel a lack, an unmet need or that something is ‘wrong’, Being is what we long for! This is the core of what / who we are as humans and spiritual Beings. According to Almaas, reconnecting with Being is what it truly means to grow up and become an adult human. Often called: Heart / Spiritual Heart, True Self, Giraff mind (non-violent communication), Essence (Diamond approach by Almaas) - YES to the present moment - Non-rejection - A sense of general ease - A sense of being in “the natural flow of life” - AND thinking - Thinking in terms of Useful / Not useful + Works / Doesn’t work - Oriented around Needs - Can embrace paradox - Relaxation and ease in body - “I am not my feelings”, “I am not my thoughts” - Focus on present moment - Allowing experience without effort or resistance - Comparison with others become meaningless - Feeling connected to one-self - Giving and Receiving happens with joy - Love and kindness feels natural and unconditional - Non-judgemental awareness towards experience - Self-compassion and compassion with others *The path* As I see it, all spiritual work that we do are different ways of reconnecting and realising our Being: - Acknowledging the vulnerability that you are resisting - Feeling the feeling instead of thinking about it - Connect with the present moment in all kinds of ways: Eating excellent food, doing things that put us in flow state, being in nature, making love, practising mindfulness - Meditation - Prayer - Tantric work - Inner child work - Breath work - Yoga - Authentic relating - Impro theatre - Spontaneous creativity and art - Ecstatic dance - And on and on I'm so happy to share some of my ways back with you ❤