Surviving the IFB: Shelly Snow Pordea on Trauma, Healing, and Fiction

Today’s episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.  We made you a mixtape of some of our fave segments from our full episodes with Daniel Shaw, LCSW,  Dr. Ramani, and Dr. Natalie Feinblatt. Think of this as our Chicken Soup for the Culty Soul power-medley. We’ve got Dan Shaw dropping knowledge on why traumatizing narcissists are so…traumatizing. We’ve got Dr. Ramani on how to recover from narcissistic abuse. And we’ve got Dr. Natalie Feinblatt on Trauma, Addiction & Cult-Informed Therapy. It’s practically a super group!  Pull up a box of tissues, and get ready for all the feels. If you’ve heard these chats before when they were first born as full ALBC episodes, we still think you’ll get some good nuggets out of them. And yes, we love the word ‘nugget’ in any form in a way that may border on problematic. We’ll be sure to talk to our therapist about that.    NOTES: Daniel Shaw, LCSW  is a psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City and in Nyack, New York. He originally trained as an actor at Northwestern University and with the renowned teacher Uta Hagen in New York City, and later worked as a missionary for an Indian guru. His eventual recognition of cultic aspects of this organization led him to become an outspoken activist in support of individuals and families traumatically abused in cults. Simultaneous with leaving this group, Dan began his training in the mental health profession, becoming a faculty member and supervisor at the National Institute for the Psychotherapist in New York. His book, Traumatic Narcissism: Relational Systems of Subjugation, was published by Routledge in 2014 and was nominated for the distinguished Gradiva Award. In 2018, the International Cultic Studies Association awarded him the Margaret Thaler Singer Award for advancing the understanding of coercive persuasion and undue influence. Shaw’s book Traumatic Narcissism and Recovery: Leaving the Prison of Shame and Fear will be published by Routledge in 2021. Dan joined Sarah and Nippy to share his story, drop some knowledge about the shameless ways of traumatizing narcissists, and provide insights on the recovery process. Dr. Ramani Durvasula is the author of two books on the subject: Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving A Relationship with a Narcissist and Don’t You Know Who I Am?: How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility. Her work has been featured at SXSW, TEDx, the Red Table Talk, the Today Show, and Investigation Discovery. You can also find her on her wildly popular YouTube channel where she dispenses wisdom on protecting yourself from hoovering, gaslighting and other narc trademarks. Or put her Navigating Narcissism podcast in your ears, on repeat: It’s good stuff. Dr. Natalie Feinblatt is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Los Angeles, California who specializes in the treatment of addiction and trauma. And one of her trauma sub-specialties is working with former cult members. She received her BA from UCSD and her Masters & Doctorate from Pepperdine University, where she wrote her doctoral dissertation on psychotherapy with former cult members and has specialized in helping them ever since. She also does EMDR, Brainspotting, and other trauma-specific therapies. She was also featured on the series finale of ‘Leah Remini: Scientology & The Aftermath.’ Follow her on Instagram for tips, tools, and healing resources.     Also…Let it be known far and wide, loud and clear that…   The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.   OTHER LINKS: Check out our lovely sponsors Join ‘A Little Bit Culty’ on Patreon Get poppin’ fresh ALBC Swag Support the pod and smash this link Cult awareness and recovery resources   CREDITS:  Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony Ames Production Partner: Citizens of Sound Producer: Will Retherford Co-Creator & Writer: Jess Tardy Theme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel Asselin  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

1 Jan 202459min

This is a short preview of an episode Sarah & Nippy recorded for the A Little Bit Culty Patreon. If you want to hear the whole thing, plus get bonus to ad-free episodes and other exclusive content, sign up at: www.patreon.com/alittlebitcultySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

28 Des 20237min

Today’s episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.  Just in case you’re thinking about joining that incredible business opportunity selling a life changing product…don’t give them your credit card info until you’ve listened to this A Little Bit Culty remix. We’ve put together a special Anti-MLM 101 Starter Kit episode with some of our favorite crusaders in the war on schemes, scams, and other internet flim-flams especially for you. Our upline on this one is pretty solid. We dug into our archives and Roberta Blevins came out swinging, so a segment from our Season 2 episode with the LuLa Rich fan fave is at the top of the batting list. She chats with us about the dangers of moldy leggings, #bossbabe energy, pricey sea cruises, other MLM tomfoolery. After Roberta, we move on to a clip from our more recent episode with Emily Lynn Paulson, an author and mother who believes that all MLMs—which form a $180 billion industry—are cults. Spoiler alert: We violently agree. And last but not least, we go all the way back to our Season 1 chat with Douglas Brooks, an attorney and MLM-buster with insights on what it takes to seek justice for people who’ve been screwed over. Take heart: When prosperity gospel grifters write big checks that their sneaky asses can’t cash, there can be legal consequences. NOTES: Roberta Blevins was a Trainer with LuLaRoe, had a team of 75 women under her, and made over $65,000 in bonuses alone. But when she came to the conclusion that it was a rigged, losing game she didn’t just leave the business: she testified in the Washington State vs. LuLaRoe Pyramid Scheme lawsuit as a witness for the state. Since leaving MLM, the fan favorite from the LuLaRich series has educated herself on the systemic structure of the business model, the psychological manipulation, the seedy underbelly and governmental ties, the cult indoctrination, and the history of Multi Level Marketing. She educates daily on TikTok, and podcasts in her "free time" on her own podcast, Life After MLM, which explores the dangers of Multi Level Marketing through the eyes of the victims and survivors. Her work has been featured on Amazon Prime Video, Vice Media, Bloomberg News, Split, and Business Insider among others. Learn more on her website or find her on Instagram @therealrobertablevins Emily Lynn Paulson is the author of Highlight Real: Finding Honesty and Recovery Beyond the Filtered Life, and Hey, Hun: Sales, Sisterhood, Supremacy, and the Other Lies Behind Multilevel Marketing. She has given two powerful TEDx talks, both challenging the status quo of parenting, alcohol use, and feminism as we know it. Paulson has also been featured in major publications such as the Today Show, New York Times, Washington Post, The Seattle Times, Chicago Tribune, Next Question with Katie Couric, and the Tamron Hall Show. She resides in Central Oregon with her husband and their five children.   Also…Let it be known far and wide, loud and clear that… The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.   OTHER LINKS: Check out our lovely sponsors Join ‘A Little Bit Culty’ on Patreon Get poppin’ fresh ALBC Swag Support the pod and smash this link Cult awareness and recovery resources   CREDITS:  Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony Ames Production Partner: Citizens of Sound Producer: Will Retherford Co-Creator & Writer: Jess Tardy Theme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel Asselin  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

25 Des 20231h 16min

This is a replay of an episode Sarah & Nippy recorded for the A Little Bit Culty Patreon. If you want to access to all of our content bonuses, ad-free episodes and other goodies, sign up at: www.patreon.com/alittlebitcultySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

21 Des 202351min

Today’s episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.  Brandie Hadfield woke up from a good-then-ultimately-nightmarish tour through the MLM world, and today she’s telling us her story without naming the organization because, well, you know culty types: They are soooooo lawsuit-happy. She got out, and today she’s a self-described recovering wellness influencer on her way to becoming a Registered Psychotherapist. She’s also working on her cult memoir, titled The MLM Recovery Handbook. She’s on a mission to warn people, new moms especially, about the dark side of the wellness space. We’ll also chat with her about her take on influencers, recruitment, and wellness coaches - and what happens when those things come wrapped in a glossy celebrity seal of approval. And hey, we love a wellness supplement, and even have some show sponsors from that space that we trust and can really stand by. But we also have no problem with calling bullshit on the culty side of the wellness world, and the MLM we’re going to discuss in this episode has been on our radar for a while. Let’s do this.    NOTES: Brandie Hadfield is a mother, writer, speaker, and advocate speaking out about commercial cults, wellness scams, and legalized labor trafficking. She believes everyone deserves freedom of mind, so she speaks out about abuses of power and coercion perpetrated by MLM scams. Her memoir is forthcoming. In the meantime, you can read her writing on on Substack and find her profile on Instagram with especially relevant-to-us hashtags #commercialcult #MLMrecovery #igotout.    Also… Let it be known far and wide, loud and clear that…   The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.   OTHER LINKS: Check out our lovely sponsors Join ‘A Little Bit Culty’ on Patreon Get poppin’ fresh ALBC Swag Support the pod and smash this link Cult awareness and recovery resources   CREDITS:  Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony Ames Production Partner: Citizens of Sound Producer: Will Retherford Co-Creator: Jess Tardy Writer: Holly Zadra Theme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel Asselin  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

18 Des 20231h 6min

This is a short preview of an episode Sarah & Nippy recorded for the A Little Bit Culty Patreon. If you want to hear the whole thing, plus get bonus to ad-free episodes and other exclusive content, sign up at: www.patreon.com/alittlebitcultySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

14 Des 20237min

Today’s episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.  Dr. Robin Stern is not your average psycho-therapist – she’s renowned for her work in emotional intelligence, relationships, and well being. And she’s the psychological sleuth who’s highlighted one particularly culty behavior: gaslighting. Fun fact: Dr. Stern actually coined the phrase “the gaslight effect.”   As we know, gaslighting is straight out of the culty charismatic coercive fuckwad playbook. But we want to get specific and don’t mean to merely call names. So in this episode, we go full CSI on gaslighting with Dr. Stern. We dissect the term with the expert who wrote several books on the subject: The Gaslight Effect and The Gaslight Effect Recovery Guide.   NOTES -  Dr. Robin Stern is co-founder and associate director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and is a licensed psychoanalyst who’s been in private practice for over 30 years. She hosts the Gaslight Effect podcast. She’s developed and co-created social emotional learning apps including HowWeFeel and OjiLifeLab. She writes and is interviewed regularly for her insight into socio-emotional matters for Psychology Today, The Hill, Time Inc., and Harvard Business Review.    You can find her on Twitter and Facebook.   If you’re looking for more, here’s an early ALBC episode specifically about narcissism and gaslighting: Shameless: Dan Shaw on Gaslighting, Narcissists, & Recovering from Cultic Abuse   Also…   Let it be known far and wide, loud and clear that…   The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.   OTHER LINKS: Check out our lovely sponsors Join ‘A Little Bit Culty’ on Patreon Get poppin’ fresh ALBC Swag Support the pod and smash this link Cult awareness and recovery resources   CREDITS:  Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony Ames Production Partner: Citizens of Sound Producer: Will Retherford Co-Creator: Jess Tardy Writer: Holly Zadra Theme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel Asselin  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

11 Des 202355min

This is a replay of an episode Sarah & Nippy recorded for the A Little Bit Culty Patreon. If you want to access to all of our content bonuses, ad-free episodes and other goodies, sign up at: www.patreon.com/alittlebitcultySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

7 Des 202333min